When it was just sex with Noah, I hadn't known what to tell them, so saying nothing was easier. Now that there was the possibility of something more, maybe it was okay to talk about it.

At the very least, saying that Noah and I were kind-of sort-of dating was less embarrassing than admitting I was letting a rock star use me as his sexual muse.

"I can't believe I get to watch Darkest Days perform from the front row!" Natalie brought her clenched fists to her flushed cheeks.

Despite the rock star boyfriend, Nat had never gotten over her excitement at seeing her favorite bands perform.

"Who's playing first?" she asked, shouting so we could hear her over the noisy crowd of people surrounding us.

"Does it matter?" Ivy shouted back.

"I need to save my energy for Morris," she said, referring to her boyfriend Morris Edwards, Feral Silence's drummer. "but I'm afraid if Darkest Days goes on first, I'll end up fainting from sheer awesomeness."

"You might end up fainting from the heat." Ivy scanned the concert venue. "Ren said it's going to be a full house. It's already cramped and it's probably going to get very hot. Why couldn't we watch from backstage?"

"Because!" Natalie and I both insisted.

"Being in the audience is a million times better," Nat explained.

"The viewing angles are all wrong backstage," I said. "You don't get the full concert experience."

"It's not as much fun if you can't cheer and scream and dance and rush the stage."

"There's nothing better than being in the middle of a rock concert surrounded by the energy of thousands of fans."

"If it's that important..." Ivy looked befuddled.

Ivy wasn't a rock music fan like Nat and me. Her preferred instrument was the cello. She was only here because her childhood sweetheart and current boyfriend Ren Sada was the bass guitarist for Feral Silence. Her first rock concert had been where she'd met Ren again after five long years.

"And what about you?" Nat grinned at me. "Are you going to be saving your energy for Noah Hart?"

I stammered, not knowing what to say.

"You're blushing!" Nat pointed an accusing finger at me. "Is there something to blush about? Have you been holding back on us? Is there something going on between you and him? How dare you not tell your best friends every detail of your life!"

"Nat, calm down," I hissed, batting her finger out of my face. I looked around surreptitiously. We were surrounded by throngs of fans. "Noah and I-"

Nat and Ivy leaned in close, eyes wide.

"I think we're sort of, maybe, in a kind of relationship," I hedged.

Nat gaped at me, astonished.

"What's a maybe, kind of, sort of relationship?" Ivy asked.

"We're sleeping together," I admitted.

Nat threw her arms around me with a cheer. "Jen's having sex with the lead singer of Darkest Days!" She pulled back and looked me directly in the eye. "Please tell me it's amazing. Please tell me it's kinky. Please tell me he has an enormous-"

"Nat!"

The lighting in the concert venue dimmed and cheers rose up.

"You're going to tell us every single detail after this concert is done," Nat demanded.

An explosion of lights and sound dazzled us. Every fan in the audience held their breath with anticipation. Nat gave me one last look and turned back to the stage as a four member band was revealed, instruments in hand.

Feral Silence's lead singer and front man Kell Pierce, with his curly blond hair flopping over his forehead, grinned madly at the audience as they cheered the band's name. He brought his hand to his ear and leaned forward, teasing the fans, indicating that we should scream louder, to which the crowd dutifully obeyed.

"Ohmigod Morris is so hot!" Nat squealed.

Although almost hidden behind his drumset, Morris's large frame, with a wide torso and chest, made him visible from the front row. He practically dwarfed Natalie in person. On stage he seemed larger than life.

Ivy's mouth popped open as a spotlight hit Ren, lighting up the long, black, glossy hair that fell over one shoulder and illuminating his sharp cheekbones and exquisite jawline. I'd wondered if he'd be playing violin for the first song, but he was holding his bass guitar loosely in his hands, long fingers caressing the strings. I saw Ivy flush and I knew she was having naughty thoughts about those fingers.

The last member of the band Jayce Evans, lead guitarist and world renowned sex god, scanned the audience with a heated gaze, causing spontaneous orgasms as his dark eyes passed over each fan. His shirtless abs were on display, causing a flurry of swoons and sighs of delight. It wasn't that Jayce only got by on his sex appeal. He was an accomplished musician. It was just that his movie star good looks didn't hurt.

I swooned and squealed and fangirl'd along with the rest of the audience, enjoying the concert as much as I always did, but some small part of me was distracted.

The last time I'd seen Noah on stage, I'd been overwhelmed by his musical prowess. I'd started having second thoughts. I didn't want that to happen this time. I wanted to enjoy his performance without drowning in self-doubt.

I just had to remind myself of all the times Noah had called me talented. I had to remember that Noah trusted me, that he had opened up to me. Noah was counting on me to help him write a song that reflected his heart and spoke to his fans.

I wasn't going to let him down.

When Feral Silence's set came to a close, Nat and Ivy turned to me, their faces shining with excitement.

"That was so awesome," Nat gushed.

"Ren's amazing," Ivy sighed happily.

"You guys are lucky," I agreed.

"Who's the lucky one?" Nat raised an eyebrow. "I think I remember you saying something about having kinky sex with the lead singer of Darkest Days."

"When did I ever say anything about kinky?"

"I've listened to his lyrics as much as you have. That man has got to be into some weird stuff."

"You can't tell that from song lyrics."

"Are you saying the sex isn't kinky?"

I felt myself flushing.

"Come on, dish. It's fine. I'll go first." Nat gave me a smug grin. "Morris likes to tie me up."

"What?" Ivy squeaked.

"It's not that weird. Noah just..." I mumbled the last few words, "likes to have sex in public."

Nat nodded appreciatively. "Nice."

"And make me beg."

Ivy looked appalled. "Oh my god."

"And do you?" Natalie asked with a naughty grin.

I flushed. "Yeah."

"Can we not be having this conversation right now?" Ivy's face was flaming.

Nat patted Ivy on the head. "Poor innocent soul. I'm sure Ren's been having a lot of fun teaching you things bit by bit, hasn't he?"

Ivy looked like she wanted to die on the spot.

The lights dimmed again, giving Ivy a reprieve. Five shadowy figures made their way on stage. I held my breath as Noah took position at the front.

Spotlights hit every member of the band as the music started with a crash of drums and heavy bass.

My heart expanded in my chest as I watched Noah sing, his expression open, eyes full of sorrow, voice filled with pain. This Noah Hart, the one on stage, was the Noah I'd first fallen for all those years ago as a teenager. Now that I knew the real man underneath, I couldn't help falling for him even further.

He thought of himself as a sell out, but I knew that wasn't true. There was no way the Noah Hart I was seeing on stage was anything except one hundred percent authentic.

I just had to figure out a way to show him that he needed to let this Noah out of its cage more often.

And I didn't know if I could do it alone.

Chapter Twenty-Three.

After the concert we headed backstage, flashing our passes to prove we weren't a bunch of groupies trying to sneak in.

Ivy and I followed Natalie's lead as she weaved and darted through event venue staff and bodyguards. I assumed she'd been backstage at enough concerts by now to know the drill.

We ended up in front of a closed door with the words artist lounge.

"Are we allowed in there?" Ivy asked.

"No," Natalie said as she pushed the door open anyway. Her face lit up as she ran inside, throwing herself at a large, muscled man with short brown hair, clinging to him with both arms.

"Morris! You were amazing! I can't believe how hot you are on stage, all the other girls in the audience were probably picturing you naked and it's not fair because you're all mine and they can't have you."

Nat babbled at her boyfriend as he gave her an indulgent look. Natalie had been worried at first that her exuberant nature would annoy someone as solemn and stoic as Morris Edwards. He found her adorable and charming instead.

A tall man with long black hair tied back in a low ponytail approached Ivy from the side and kissed her cheek.

"Hey beautiful," Ivy's boyfriend Ren murmured in her ear. "Did you enjoy the show?"

"It was loud."

Ren gave her a soft smile. "I'll buy you earplugs next time."

"It's okay. I don't want to miss a second of your performance. You were great on the violin tonight."

"It's all that duet practice with you."

"It has nothing to do with me. You've always been amazing."

"You're the one who's amazing."

They gazed into each other's eyes as Ren pressed a kiss to each of her fingertips. I left the two of them alone to be sickeningly sweet together before I threw up rainbows and kittens.

An arm caught me by the waist and swung me around, nearly sweeping me off my feet. I smiled to myself, happy that Noah was being so openly affectionate.

"You looking for a good time, gorgeous?"

Cameron swung me into his view until we were face to face. His bright red hair fell over his eyes, which were heavily rimmed with black eyeliner. He gave me a sultry look, full lips titled upward as if he knew a secret and I didn't.

I pushed at his bare, sweaty chest. He had taken his shirt off on stage again. Those abs of his were even more impressive this close up. No wonder all the girls swooned.

"If I was looking for a good time, it wouldn't be with you."

"Ouch," He faked a wince and squeezed me tighter. "Shot down again. If you keep on rejecting me, I might start feeling unloved."

"I'm sure you can find dozens of girls willing to give you their love."

"But we always want the ones we can't have, don't we?"

"What are you doing?"

Noah's flat voice rang out from behind me. I turned in Cameron's arms to find him glaring at us. Noah was dressed in his rock star best, all black, mesh top, leather pants, and the barest hint of kohl around his eyes, much more restrained than Cameron's heavy gothic look.

My insides fluttered, heat pooling between my legs at the sight. Noah was already an attractive man, but the primal sensuality of Noah in leather pants and eyeliner was going to be my undoing.

"Just getting in some snuggle time with my favorite girl." Cameron threw Noah a smug grin and he cuddled me close to his chest.

Noah's expression twisted as he marched over.

"Hands off," he growled.