Dark By Default - 10 A Sociopath's Stale Transition
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10 A Sociopath's Stale Transition

-F. d.i.c.kson

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Whatever obscurity that took place that eventide, I considered obsolete in my memories as dwelling in the past can't help me do anything at all. That...is undoubtedly correct. Although the saved images in my mind can't seem to let me go for the better, haunting me to my quotidian living up to my worst nightmares, I compelled myself to move on, towards a future so opaque and colorless, that it is enough to induce someone into the highest extent of nausea, or into the deepest part of the abyss, where a single ray of hope can't enter and where a minuscule of gargantuan despair can't even abscond.

"Insignificant."

If I were to describe how the years came and go from that grotesque night of derangement, it was to be that one word.

Every day, I would wake up in the same room and follow the same path, to dully live the recent day the same as yesterday. As Spencer Cathcart would say, "every day is a new adventure", yet along the way of that pilgrimage, nothing changed, for me...at least. I am now 18 years old and is currently attending a life of humility and simplicity with a bit of mixture of a supernatural element, yet with great satisfaction. And today, a big alteration to my daily paradigm is about to unveil.

What? Don't tell me you expected more?

Well, as far as it concerns me, I am currently enrolled in an elite educational inst.i.tution where if you lack intelligence, you are of no meaning and merit. Oh right, every educational inst.i.tution is like that, may it be elite or not...my bad. Education today fail to fathomless extents that calling it "education" would be a stereotypical insult. How can I say so, you ask? Well, there are barrels of rational reasons and a few arguments that support the idea of education as a daunted system. Hear me out as I extrapolate a few, with my experiences as the pedestal...

First. Teachers would offer more of their attention to students that are already intellectually stellar and have a clear future up ahead and just discard those students that need help in discovering their potential and capabilities from the get-go. Simply put, if we are to not have these 'innate" talents to reign supreme in any academic endeavors, we are hereby given the sobriquet 'Nimrod', a name of petty humiliation, as it means nothing more but foolishness and uselessness in the fastly improving economy.

Second. Instead of going to school to learn, the majority of parents would desperately make their children binge study the whole d.a.m.ned academic book before the school year would even start or even enroll them on cramming schools and pay a fortune, for them to notch an easy honor roll when cla.s.s officially starts. That, dear parents, destroy the core purpose of the existence of education, and most of the time just makes me wonder if the school is a place for learning or is it just a mad dominance filled with selfish pa.s.sion and compet.i.tion. Tell me, which is it? School as a place of learning? Or school as a place for your children's' compet.i.tion, where we deem ourselves as pokemons that never questions their owners' decisions, and are exploited from time to time.

Compet.i.tion overall is not bad of course, yet as to how it was implemented in the system falter in ways that are a.s.sured to give off unauthentic aftermaths. Yet, I can neither blame the parents or the learners as it is the system's fault on brainwas.h.i.+ng the ma.s.ses, that education is "life's greatest equalizer" which is not and never will, as it failed to reach even a quarter of life's worth.

As an excursus, school is supposed to be a place of failure as it was preordained to be filled with our "firsts" in life. Yet that was not the case, as the system made it seem like a place of consecutive achievements making us unprepared for the unprecedented ups and downs on the upcoming chapters of our individual fairy tales. Not conventional enough?

How about setting our perspectives in a more sophisticated monetary way? Education as many claimed, is a primeval gateway to what is referred to as "success", where anyone who completes it will have a decent job one day and be "happy to no bounds". Moreover, nah. I can't find myself believing in such idealistic balderdash. If education is that potent in developing "life-long learners", then society would have had a lot of iconic personas which already made their names or sparked any legacy in different sectors of businesses, and the world as we could have known had long- won the fight against poverty and economic crisis. Yet what happened? 53 % of graduates according to reliable statistics find themselves unemployed and financially struggling just a year after receiving their college or university diplomas.

And let us say, 100 % of college graduates are employed (which is quite impossible), there is one out of eleven personas that are not receiving a paycheck, five out of ten whose monthly wages don't reach the recommended median and two out of ten, find themselves in a pinch after being recruited by corrupt leaders. Now tell me. Is education a gateway to success? Or does it simply just move the course of life to a more intricate and harder level. Levels filled with elevated stress and escalated financial needs. Not to mention our days, under these systems are in continuous hectic schedules.

You see, the healthiest of human beings have an utmost 115 years of lifespan, of which 93% of the current population would even fail to reach their 90's. And in that 90 years of life (If you are lucky that is), you spent approximately 27 years in the school including the fruition of your master course, which if converted is a whopping 41, 760 hours, excluding the time you spent on doing extracurricular activities and your daily home works and lesson reviews. You are then expected to be married somewhere between your 20's and 30's and is forced to work until you are 65 years of age only to get a dime of time left to be spent with your family before your last breath. Now, does that seem rational to you?

Why am I saying this? For no special reason.

Out of my self-thought of philosophic hatred against the educational system, a soft voice came in, disturbing me from the little chitchat I had with my mind.

"I am not dumb to not understand any of the drivels you just thought, but could you cease these cringe claims? Stop making this narrative a statistical data presentation!" Lacrimosa, who was by a giant gla.s.s window beside me, spoke with a facade that spells boredom from giving attention to my thoughts.

"On what criterion did you rate that as 'cringe'? You know, I would appreciate it if you would stop doing that. It's high time for you to 'really' respect my right to privacy" I responded, out of a minute of embarra.s.sment.

"No can do. By the way... Why are we so early again?" She replied, with yet another question.

Ah right, I completely forgot. It is still Six AM and here I am with a G.o.ddess who concealed her presence entirely, in a not-so-crowded bullet train in the way to a gargantuan city of renown.

(...)

Looking back prior that day, my grandma was quite desperate for me to be early at the start of this academic year, which unfortunately starts today. And by the way, It may seem far-fetched, but to introduce the updated setting of my teenage life, I can't just forget to mention that the j.a.panese succeeded in their endeavor to build an artificial island besides Asia, just north from the Philippines with the aid of other countries. They were to name it 'X-seed 2000' and are to be exclusive for j.a.pan only, yet for some reason decided to make it a city with no racial bounds. To this day, it is named 'The International Clark City' or the ICC which is about the size of New York. The city hosts establishments, ranging from the rich industries, residential areas, to entertainment facilities that are, by which, second to none.

Now, my school is situated in that artificial island. The 'Autonomous University' or 'AU' for short, which is an international inst.i.tution comprised of a population from different races and discrepant cultures. It was not always situated on this island, but as it pa.s.sed international standards, it was deemed worthy to be relocated to ICC and to be the first academic inst.i.tution to be there. That is just unfortunate. It was formerly an easy five-minute walk from my grandma's house, but now, I was forced to leave that haven of a home and rent a simple condominium inside the city for a more 'authentic' school life and to train me to be more independent (which I already am )as my grandma suggested. But, there is just no arguing with that woman.

As the train was continuously rus.h.i.+ng through the rails set ablaze, and as the G.o.ddess beside me spouted nothing but complaints about this 'early bird scenario', my vision s.h.i.+fted quickly from land to a vast blue sea, and in the distance, I can see the International City with its towering glories, in which one of it was unequivocally AU itself. The University, I am to attend. And don't get it wrong, I did not attend that school to look more or less like Ayanokoji Kiyotaka from the Cla.s.sroom of the Elite, nor to have a luxurious educational background. My grandma decided to enroll me there, as it boasted 'free quality education' for everyone whose admission is accepted. Having said that, and with a guardian who is so minimal in utilizing money, my monthly allowance would probably be just for the rent and for a basic head start of my new life as the old hag also encouraged me to work part-time for experience (which clearly, is a questionable excuse).

Just a few minutes pa.s.sed, we arrived at the destination. I, together with Lacrimosa, who suppressed her presence disembarked from the train. It may sound half-witted, for a powerful G.o.ddess who could have had transported us here in a snap of a finger to take on a train, but she implied that she put restraints in her divine authority over nature to hide from the others. The "others" she mentioned, I have no idea as to who or what it could be, all I know is that she will only utilize her power given certain situations that need immediate actions.

As we successfully got off from the means of transportation, the G.o.ddess let out a big sigh as she stretched her back."Finally, I never knew that transportation could be this inconvenient", she added.

"You should be thankful that it was not that crowded, or else you would have had used the snapping-finger teleportation Jutsu. You should bless my grandma for making us go early", I responded.

She replied nothing much, but a harsh "Hmmppp", yet whatever...

From my bag, I left out my digital ID provided just after my admission and logged in at the futuristic attendance terminal by the school gate. Lastly, I handed several requirements to the school registrar making my enrollment viable and validated.

"Thank you for your admission. We hope for you to have a great student life here at AU! Enjoy it to the fullest young man" the lady by the office said, in a cheerful manner that could have been enough to make anyone smile and reply with a lively tone.

Yet I am different, how could I enjoy it to the fullest, when I lost all of the reason to strive hard a long time ago? Most likely...it is impossible.