"No, it's the opposite, actually. He hasn't kissed me yet."

Mike laughed. I could almost see him tilting his head forward, scratching his brow. "How long have you been official?"

"Well, how long were you and Bec official before you guys did more than just kiss?"

"That's different. I'm an adult and you're a kid. Did you ever think that that might be his problem? You being under eighteen?" Mike concluded. "How old is this guy, anyway?"

"He's a little older." I brushed over that one. "And yes, I did consider the fact that we're not technically adults." Well I wasn't, but David was. "But we are at the legal age of consent here, and he's a hot-blooded male-and there have been opportunities. I just don't get it. A kiss can't hurt, right?"

"Unless you're a hot-blooded male, Ara," he said dryly. "A kiss can make you want a lot more, and maybe he just has-" he paused for a second, "-self-knowledge? He might think he won't wanna stop if you were to ask him to go further. And maybe he's afraid if he did have the willpower to stop, it might hurt your feelings." His voice dropped on the end.

"That could have something to do with it. But it makes me feel-" I knew the word, but didn't want to admit it.

"Undesirable?"

"Yes," I muttered.

He laughed-a loud, full bellow.

The tightness in my stomach spread to my teeth. "Mike. Stop it. Don't laugh at me, you know I hate that!"

He stopped instantly. "I'm sorry, Ara, it's just that...I've always thought you were cute. I'm not stupid, I have eyes, and I promise, you are not undesirable."

"Mike, you can't say that. You're my friend."

"Yes, I'm your friend, which means I can say that."

I typed pick up Mike on Tuesday in my desktop calendar then went back to iTunes.

"What're you doing?" Mike asked, sensing my absence, I guess.

"Downloading a song." I clicked on search.

"A legal download, I hope," he muttered in his stern 'cop' voice.

"Yes," I hissed, rolling my eyes.

"What song?"

"It's by this band called Live. You know them, right?"

"Yeah," Mike scoffed. "Why would you be listening to them, though? It's a little old for you, isn't it?"

"Mike, I'm three years your junior. If it's old for me, it's old for you."

Overcome started downloading so I looked up the song David said reminds him of me-the one by Muse. I just had to hear it again. My playlist of David was getting very long.

"So, what song then?" Mike asked after a moment.

"Oh, um, the Live one?"

"Yeah."

"Overcome."

"Where'd you hear that one?"

"David likes it. He played it today on his iPhone. Why?"

"You know me, baby; I judge how you're feeling by your playlist. Don't you think that song's a little...?"

"What, depressing?"

"Maybe," he said reluctantly.

"Mike. Are you worried that I'm suici-"

"No. Ara. Please don't think that. I just-you normally listen to such happy music. I just thought-"

"Really, I'm fine." Just tired of people thinking I'm depressed. "I know Vicki and Dad think I'm suicidal and, to be honest, if you all don't leave me alone, I might have to do something rash just to get you off my back. So, shut it! Okay? I'm fine."

The line went dead silent. He should've been used to my outbursts, but I guess, with all the miles between us, it was harder to just brush it off like normal. "I'm sorry," he said.

"Good. 'Cause I'm okay. I have David. My life is about him now. Look-" I exhaled and softened my tone. "I love you, Mike. I know you're just worried. But it's really an insult to my character that everyone keeps watching me all the time for the wrong move. I live with a former psychiatrist, for God's sake. I'll go crazy soon." I took a breath and the smell of Vicki's cooking filled my nostrils. "I need to feel free to make mistakes or listen to depressing music, and I need you to be with me on that." It was supposed to be an attempt at reason, but unfortunately for Mike, he'd just become victim to two months' worth of saved-up ranting. "Mike?" His quiet breath revealed his presence. "Mike?"

"You're not a little girl anymore, Ara," he concluded softly. "What's happened these last few months has...well, it's changed you. A lot. You've really had to grow up and...I'm sorry for that." I rested my hand over my belly button to quiet the flutters his words formed there. "But I'm also really proud of you. I just need to see you again-make sure you're still my girl."

"I'll always be your girl, Mike. You're my best friend."

"But you have David now. You won't be needing me for much longer."

"Don't say things like that, Mike."

"Why? You know it's true. But it's okay," he assured himself. "It'll just be an adjustment, that's all-not having you all to myself whenever I wanna talk to you."

"It was the same for me when you were dating Lyndall. It's just the way things are. But I'm sure we'll always be friends."

"Yeah, I'm sure we will." After a second, he laughed softly. "I'm really looking forward to seeing you. I can't wait to pick you up and squeeze you until you can't breathe."

"Ha! No way. I'll totally squeeze you harder."

"Sure, those skinny spider arms'll do so much damage."

"Shut up, Hercules!" I chuckled the words out.

"Miss you." Mike sighed, his laughter ceasing.

"I know you do."

The morning greeted me with a light, airy feeling, and the awakening floral scent of frangipanis sent shivers of normality through my chest. I snuck down the stairs and quietly opened the front door, hoping Vicki wouldn't realise how late I was today. But it wasn't my fault; ever since I met David, the world was just too good to leave behind for the sake of sleep. So, technically, it was his fault I slept through my alarm this morning.

The last of the minivan parade sped past my dad's house as I reached the edge of the driveway, and the glowing heat of the sun warmed my skin while the sight of David warmed my whole day. Completely distracted, as usual, he didn't even see me walk out.

As I cleared the windbreak of the house, the morning breeze blew in from the east, sweeping the dewy scent of roses in on its back. Strands of my hair caught the gust and wisped pleasantly along my shoulders like tickly feathers. I closed my eyes and lost myself in the sensation.

"Ara! Look out!"

My eyes shot open. The windshear of a speeding car nearly sucked me onto the road, but a hand gripped my arm and yanked me from the edge. "Jeeze, Ara!" Sam dropped my arm. "What the hell were you thinking?"

I swallowed hard and blinked. One more step and I would've been under that car. "Sorry, Sam. It wasn't there when I started crossing."

"I know." He watched the beaten-up old bomb scream around the corner-smoke billowing out from its exhaust. "He came out of nowhere."

"Sam." A smile spread over my shock. "You just saved my life."

"David. How come you didn't see that?" He looked over my shoulder just as warm hands clasped my waist; David spun me into him, ignoring Sam. "Man, you were looking right at her."

"Are you okay?" David asked in a soft whisper, cupping my cheek.

"Mm-hm." I nodded.

"I-" He shook his head and looked at Sam. "I was looking this way, but I was...I just didn't see it."

I touched my collarbone; it felt like my heart was trying to break through the skin. David placed his hand over mine.

"Well, I gotta get to school," Sam said, nodding toward the building as the last bell rang. "You need me to hold your hand across the road, sis?"

"Funny." I rolled my eyes.

"Take care, Ara. Okay?" Sam started walking backward. "Dad only just got you back. It'll kill him if you...do something stupid."

My mouth fell open. "It was an accident," I called out, standing on my toes to make my voice seem bigger.

He shrugged and kept walking.

"I'm sorry, Ara." David's eyes, still lost along the outline of my face, narrowed when I looked back at him. "I really-" his brow tightened, "-should have seen that."

"It's not your fault, David. I was totally in my own world." I laughed, but David just shook his head.

"Your heart. It's beating so fast." He wrapped one arm, then the other around my shoulders and squeezed me tight enough to trap my hands against my chest.

"It's because you're doing that."

He said something to me then, in a tone I interpreted as anger or maybe fear, but the words were in French.

"Huh?"

"Come on, let's just get to class." He started walking.

"David?" I said. "What is it? Is something wrong?"

"I-" His chest heaved, almost unnoticeably, as if he were regurgitating or maybe choking on words.

"Oh God, there is something wrong." My heart picked up again and everything around me disappeared to insignificance. He didn't move, didn't speak, just stood-motionless, wordless and unresponsive. Tiny bubbles of despair flitted around my stomach. I felt like everyone on the school grounds was watching us. But the field was empty; we were late, and I didn't care. "Does this have something to do with the reason you don't wanna kiss me?"

"What? Is that what you think? That I don't want to kiss you?" He shook his head and started walking away. "Honestly, Ara, I don't know where you come up with these things."

"Well, then, tell me what's wrong. What am I supposed to think when you act like this?" I stepped out onto the road, pointing back to the spot where we'd just been standing.

He stopped, but didn't turn around.

"David, what is it, what's wrong?"

His head rolled downward. "I spoke to my uncle last night."

"Okay, and?"

"And-" He turned to face me again. "When he comes to visit today, he has requested I return with him."

"Return? Return where?"

"New York."

"Why? For how long?"

David's eyes closed for a second. "For good."

"What? You're leaving?"

He looked up then, and I don't think he expected to see the hurt I could feel coming from my eyes. Without a word, he closed the gap between us and wrapped his body around me, pinning my face to his cool silk shirt. And though the warmth of his hands invited my soul to feel love, his heart betrayed the anguish in his eyes-seeming completely still, as if it weren't even beating-certainly not feeling the pain I was. "Ara, leaving was never optional for me."

My stomach sunk. "But...you said. You told me you weren't going anywhere."

His shoulders dropped. "I know. I-it was silly of me to say that. I got caught up in you, in this, and I made promises I knew, even then, that I probably couldn't keep."

"C-" My mouth hung open, stuck on a word. "Caught up? You don't just get caught up, then make fake promises."

"It wasn't fake. When I made that promise, my every intention was to try to keep it."

"Well, what's changed? Why can't you keep it now?"

"You might say reality came back to pay me a visit."

I stared at him. "What kind of answer is that? That tells me nothing, David."

"I know. I'm sorry. I've done everything the wrong way here. I just wasn't prepared to come here and fall in love, and now that I have, I need to rethink everything my life means."

"But...can't you rethink your life...with me in it?"