I gazed at her for a very long time. I hated what I saw.

She looked much uglier than she had in life. Worthless. I wanted her dirty body out of my car. And yet ... something. Something wasn't right.

The fabric.

That thought screamed at me, froze my limbs. My mouth unhinged. I stared at the sack of flesh, that bent neck-and I understood. understood.

My life opened up before me.

I reached for the glove compartment and reverently removed the black silk cloth. Suddenly it was no longer a mystical unknown. It had become my purpose.

I ran it through my hands. Closed my eyes and smelled it.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

I pushed the woman's body up straight. Wound the cloth tight around her neck and tied a knot.

Sitting back, I surveyed my work.

No. Still not right.

My fingers found the fabric again. Over the knot I formed an awkward bow.

Again I pulled away and gazed, like an art critic before a painting.

Yes. This was it. Perfection. I felt it in my gut. She looked like a wrapped present. A gift. To me. me.

I smiled.

For a moment I leaned back in my seat and simply breathed breathed.

Logistical details began to surface in my head. I forced the body down over the console, where it couldn't be seen by anyone else. Just in case. I drove farther into the woods. Dragged her out of the car and into the trees about a hundred feet from the dirt road.

I laid her on her back, chin tilted up. My last lingering look focused on the cloth. Even though I had more, much more, I felt sorry leaving it behind.

Under the sliver moon, I made my way back to the car and drove off.

My heart floated. Relief and joy wrapped around me like an oven-warmed blanket.

On the way home I threw the woman's purse in a dumpster behind a closed grocery store.

By the time I reached my place, I was exhausted. That night I enjoyed the best sleep I'd had in the past week. Before going to bed I felt compelled to cut another strip of the black silk.

The next day I awoke wondering if it was all a dream.

Reality hit. I had killed. killed.

Why would I do that? would I do that?

The fabric. It was the fabric.

On a gut level I knew this. Yet still that cloth sang to me. I couldn't imagine getting rid of it.

By noon I would talk myself out of the silly notion that it was to blame.

In my car I found a couple brown hairs. Dirt on the floor. I'd just washed and vacuumed the car the day before. I washed and vacuumed it again. Removed the vacuum bag, took it across town and threw it in a dumpster.

I worried about the parking lot. Had anyone seen me pick up the woman? But I knew it had been empty.

Leaving her car there was good. Very good. That would throw detectives off the trail. They'd think she left with someone in the bar. They'd question everyone there that night. If I were investigating, that's the first thing I'd do.

Why did I kill her?

Too much to drink at the party maybe.

No matter, it wouldn't happen again. I'd been driven beyond myself, the victim of some sinister compulsion. But no more. Now I was in charge of my own life.

The next day I went back to work feeling normal. normal.

On the news that night I heard the story. A couple of hikers headed up into the hills saw a flash of color some distance off the dirt road. Something made them check it out.

No report of the most crucial detail. A bow of black silk cloth with green stripes tied around the victim's neck.

Of course I understood why.

CHAPTER twenty-six

As Kaitlan walked away from Chief Barlow, Craig lasered her with his eyes. Hand at her back, he steered her toward Hallie.

"Kaitlaaaan!" Hallie sang the name in that lilt of hers, flinging an arm around Kaitlan's neck. "Thanks for coming to my party!"

Hallie was tanned and athletic, with large brown eyes. Coa.r.s.ely textured and straight, her hair was highlighted in varying shades of honey blonde. She'd starting coming to Kaitlan for styling two months ago. Good thing. Her cut had been all wrong for the shape of her face.

Hallie, if you knew the trouble I was in, would you help me?

"Wouldn't miss it." Kaitlan managed a smile.

Craig kissed Hallie's cheek. "Happy birthday, Sis."

Kaitlan shuddered at the thought of those lips on her own skin.

"Thanks." Hallie rolled her hand in the air. "Everybodyyyy! Does everyone know Kaitlan, the very best hairstylist in in the world? I should know because she made me look terrific." She pushed up one side of her hair in an animated primp. the world? I should know because she made me look terrific." She pushed up one side of her hair in an animated primp.

Kaitlan heard laughs and a chorus of "Hi, Kaitlans." She tried to nod to each person.

Hallie bounced her hand from one friend to the next, introducing each one. Patty from work and her husband, Mike. Sheila and Leslie, also from the counseling service. And their dates, somebody and somebody. Then seven or eight more people. Kaitlan tried to focus, but the faces and names started to run together.

"And of course my wonderful dad, who's paying for this night on the town!" Hallie picked up a gla.s.s from a nearby table and raised it high in the air.

"Hear, hear!" The others joined in her toast.

"Thank you," Chief Barlow boomed. "It's costing me a fortune, but hey. Anything for family."

He slid a look at Kaitlan.

"So go ahead, Hallie." Patty waved her fingers in the air. "You were telling us about the crazy guy at work."

"Oh, yeah." Hallie looked to Kaitlan. "This was a few years ago, and the people are long gone, so I can tell the story."

Sheila shook her head. "We counsel some of the nuttiest people."

Hallie guzzled a quick drink. "So like I was saying this woman and her husband come in, say they can't pay the bills, are always fighting about money, blah, blah. The husband says the wife's spending too much, and the wife says well maybe if he'd get a job job ..." ..."

Her audience laughed.

"So I say to him, 'You're not working?' 'No,' he says, 'I don't see the need.' " Hallie rolled her eyes. "Right. 'I don't see the need.' Then I turn to the wife. 'You working?' 'Yes, two jobs.' 'Two jobs?' I point to the husband. 'And he's not doing anything?' Hubby speaks up. 'I'm doing something. I'm cutting out coupons.' "

"Oh, good grief." Eddie shook his head.

"See what I mean?" Sheila's eyebrows raised.

Hallie pushed hair off her forehead. " 'Coupons,' I say. 'You mean like for the grocery store?' 'Yeah.' He looks proud. 'I save us a good twenty dollars a week.' "

She c.o.c.ked her head with an "I can't believe this" expression. " 'Twenty whole dollars.' I drag out the words, like-wow, you know. 'Wonder how much you'd make make if you if you worked worked all week.' He looks at me like I'm crazy. 'But then I couldn't clip coupons.' " Hallie gurgled a laugh. " 'Try clippin' 'em at night,' I tell him. 'Working moms do that all the time.' 'Oh,' he says, 'but I read too slow.' " all week.' He looks at me like I'm crazy. 'But then I couldn't clip coupons.' " Hallie gurgled a laugh. " 'Try clippin' 'em at night,' I tell him. 'Working moms do that all the time.' 'Oh,' he says, 'but I read too slow.' "

"Read too slow!" Steve guffawed.

Hallie giggled. "No, no, wait, doesn't stop there. He says, 'And my fingers are stiff, so I cut slow too.' "

Everyone howled.

"Oh, get outta here," Joe said. "I don't believe this."

"I'm telling you, it's true!" Hallie pushed his shoulder. "This is the kind of idiots we have to deal with."

"Yeah, well, try working on the police force," Chief Barlow said. "You see a few nuts there too."

Not to mention a murderer ... ...

A few latecomers arrived, interrupting the conversation. People broke into smaller groups. Kaitlan didn't know where to go. She didn't want to stay near Craig, and Hallie was in too much of a party mood.

Craig gestured toward the open bar. "I'll get us some wine."

"No. Thanks, but ... I'll take some 7UP."

He gave her a long look. "You never drink 7UP."

"My stomach's kind of queasy. Maybe that'll settle it."

Oh, no, why' d you say that?

Craig scratched his jaw, eyes still on her. Like he was looking right into her soul. "I've never known you to have stomach trouble before."

Surely he couldn't know she was pregnant. Could he?

Kaitlan went hot. The pregnancy test kit. The pregnancy test kit. He'd been in her apartment... He'd been in her apartment...

No, no wait. She'd taken the garbage out this morning.

Kaitlan suppressed a shudder. "I haven't exactly had the easiest day."

No response.

Craig moved away to get their drinks. She watched him approach the bar, trying to hear what he ordered. What if he didn't come back with 7UP? She wasn't about to drink alcohol, not now.

Joe appeared at her side, navy blue T-shirt showing off the biceps he spent every day in the gym maintaining. His block-shaped face and one-inch flat top added to the don't-mess-with-me look, but Kaitlan saw concern in his brown eyes. "You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure. Why?"

"You seem a little tense."

Was she that obvious? Kaitlan glanced across the room at Chief Barlow-and their eyes met. She looked away.

"I'm fine." And she smiled. Widely.

Craig returned and handed her a gla.s.s. "7UP." He shook his head at Joe. "Girl's gone nonalcoholic on me."

Joe shrugged. "Happens to the best of us."

Was it just Kaitlan's imagination, or did she sense underlying meaning in their casual comments?

Craig-she's acting different. Should I be worried?

Joe-It's nothing, relax.

Did Joe know about Craig too?

Would he do that-protect Craig? Would Steve and Eddie?

Cops were so tight. Day in, day out, they protected each other, laid their lives on the line for each other. Hard to turn that around when one of their own became the criminal.