He rolled his eyes. "I'm one hundred percent certain you're on a first-name basis with my nightstick, baby, but that's not what I'm talking about. I was okay with this 'friends with benefits' thing at first, but after all these months, is it still what you really want?"

If only she could say no, and let him into the dark parts of her heart. Pulling free of his grip, she shrugged. "I'm pretty happy the way things are, but I understand if you're not. Just say the word."

"Damn it, I'm happy with you. You make me happier than I can even put into words. I just wanted to take you out. That's all. Now, come back to bed. You didn't get much sleep before I woke you up." He tugged at her arms, drawing her toward the bed behind him.

"I don't really feel like sleeping. I think I'm going to go read a book in the living room. You can go back to sleep, though. I'll make sure you're up in time to shower for work." She pressed a quick kiss to his mouth and pulled free from his grip, leaving him standing there alone in her bedroom as she made her escape.

That had been too close for comfort. She needed to consider her next move carefully, or they were both going to wind up hurt.

Colby picked her up Friday evening in his pickup truck, and they spent the drive to Minot comparing their list of favorites.

"How can you possibly say that Maroon 5 has had a bigger impact on music than Vince Gill? That's sacrilegious, coming from a girl raised in the country."

Elizabeth's shoulder rose and dropped sharply. "Adam Levine is sexier than Vince Gill."

Colby's mouth fell open. "You actually like that skinny, pretty boy?"

"What's not to like? He's covered in tattoos, worth a fortune, and the man can sing his ass off."

"Well, it wouldn't take much. His ass is smaller than my right leg," Colby grumbled, making Elizabeth giggle.

She reached across the console that separated their seats and patted his thigh. "Very recently I've found myself more and more attracted to thicker thighs. Ones with muscles that can hold my ass up while the man..." She sighed loudly and pretended to get lost in her fantasies and Colby squirmed uncomfortably in his seat.

"Stop that, woman. We have at least another hour's worth of drive and I damn sure don't want to do it with a hard-on." He winked at her, and she leaned forward with her chin on her hand.

"I could help you with that, you know?"

The look he gave her melted her panties, and she felt a wicked zip of desire skitter through her.

"Why Miss Elizabeth Newcomer, are you suggesting something completely naughty and illegal?" he teased.

"I would never proposition an officer of the law with something illegal." She released her seatbelt and turned to kneel on her seat. "That could get me arrested."

"Fuck, baby. I want you so much, but this ain't safe. Sit back down. My cock and I will be just fine until we get to Minot." His jaw was as tight as the denim over his cock, and Elizabeth considered her options.

"There's a rest stop about ten minutes ahead, I think. It's not a truck stop one, just a park with bathrooms and trucker sleeping areas. I could use a stretch." She stretched her torso across the console and reached to stroke her hand over his erection.

"I'm stretched to the max already," he hissed, his hips rocking up to meet her touch. "The rest stop's less than five minutes away, so sit down and buckle up. I want to see if we can make it in two."

Laughing, she resumed her seat until they could reach a safe, secluded place to play. She loved how easily he agreed to her dirty demands. He was by far the best lover she had-even if she didn't have much to compare it with-but more than that, he'd become the best friend she needed in her life.

They spent hours talking about everything and nothing as they lay in bed, only to turn to each other and wind up exploring passion and kink together. Colby was willing to try anything once, and he loved fulfilling the dirty fantasies she came up with. Even this trip was an opportunity to fulfill a few items on her wish list. She had an inkling they'd be making the most of their private time. Which was good, because when they got back to Montford, she was going to have to end things. He'd already invested his heart, and if she kept this up, she was going to lose hers too. She couldn't risk it. She'd barely managed to hang on the last time she let someone steal her heart.

Guilt filled her mouth with a sour taste, and she stared out the window at the sunset as Colby drove. Eventually, they were going to have a heart-to-heart. He deserved to know why she couldn't give him everything.

8.

Elizabeth tried her damnedest to come up with an easy way to break things off with Colby the whole time they were in Minot, and then after they'd returned to Montford. She'd been more distant and withdrawn. She'd been a bit bitchier, and harder to please, but nothing seemed to work. It was like he was truly determined to stay put, no matter what. That's how she found herself snuggled up in bed with him a couple of weeks after their romantic weekend, being confronted with the question she'd dreaded.

"How did you end up divorced?"

"That's quite a question."

"It's something I've been wondering, but if it's too close or too personal, forget it. I just want to understand." Colby kissed her forehead, hoping she'd feel the need to share part of herself with him. He'd already spilled all of his own secrets. The fear he'd felt leaving for the Navy. The excitement of getting the job out in San Francisco, even the guilt for agreeing that his mother's disease had made caring for her too difficult recently. He and Abby were looking for a decent care facility to put her in.

"No, I get it. I'm sure everyone in town is wondering," Elizabeth paused and cleared her throat. "It's not easy to talk about, but when Matt and I met in high school, I thought all my dreams were coming true. He wanted family and security. He said he loved me. It seemed perfect. We talked about college and had so many plans..."

"You guys didn't date long in high school, did you?" Colby remembered Mathew Newcomer as a decent guy who never made it off the junior varsity baseball team in spite of his MLB dreams. He even recalled the day he'd seen Matt and Elizabeth share a quick kiss during a school dance. Elizabeth had looked lovely in a young, innocent sort of way, and Colby had admired her from afar as his much more worldly date danced against him.

"Not really. We met in March when he moved here. Graduated in June, and we were married in August."

He couldn't keep his mouth shut, and he heard himself ask, "Married in August? Like 'six months after meeting' August?

"Yeah, three weeks after I found out I was pregnant."

Colby couldn't believe his ears. Shock coursed through his system. She had a child? What was going on? Where was the kid? "So uh...you had a baby with Matt?"

"No, I didn't. We were pregnant and then we weren't. The doctor said it was nothing I did. Nothing anyone could have done. I miscarried at nine weeks. Matt seemed okay with it, in the beginning. It was me who was upset. Devastated. I felt like I'd let him down, let our child down. I just knew it was my fault. Somehow, I'd done something to kill our baby. And then things changed. By Christmas we were barely speaking, just existing. We slept in the same bed, ate at the same table, but we weren't together anymore. He dropped out of college after that fall semester. I hadn't even enrolled because of the pregnancy. I couldn't figure out how I would go to school and raise a baby. So we decided it was better if he went to school first. When he was done, I would go, or at least when the baby started kindergarten, but none of that happened. Everything just fell apart."

"So you divorced because of the miscarriage?" He was going to murder Matt if he ever saw him again.

"I'm sure it sounds like that, but I'm not sure that's even the case. I think we were just young and full of ideals and hopes and dreams we didn't understand. It's not easy to be married. Hell, it's not easy to commit to a relationship and be faithful and trust the other person-"

"Calm down, baby; if this is too much, we don't have to talk about it tonight."

"Thanks. I knew you'd ask eventually. I don't like talking about it. I feel like I gave up everything I ever dreamed of because I thought the grass was greener on the other side."

"The grass is usually greener on the other side because the sun is hitting it at a different angle," he said simply.

She laughed and shook her head. "Only you, Colby. Only you."

"What? It's true. Hell, they might mow it a different way, or maybe it's a different type of grass, or maybe they water it more. The point is, all grass is green."

She slapped his shoulder and rolled away laughing. Standing naked next to the bed, she turned back, and Colby lost his breath taking in the beauty of her lush curves. He loved wrapping his hands around her tiny waist and pounding against her soft ass.

"I'm gonna take a shower, and then I think I need a snack. Want something?"

"Whatcha thinking?"

"I think I have some microwave popcorn, or even some cheese and crackers."

"Oh, baby, I can do so much better than that. Get a shower and get dressed and we'll get dinner."

She gaped at him like he'd lost his mind. "At this hour? Nothing's open."

"Nothing's open in town, but Casa Bricker is open all hours."

"You want to take me to your house? Isn't your mother there? And Abby?" she asked, surprise registering on her face.

"Mama is there for sure. Abby probably is. That nurse has been coming in for a few hours three days a week until we can get Mama placed. Thank God for government health insurance or we wouldn't be able to leave her alone at all. Come on Bethie-baby, get in the shower. I want you all wet again."

She giggled as she led the way to the bathroom. Colby followed, hot on her heels like a lovesick puppy. Maybe he was. Maybe he was so lost in what could be, that he couldn't grasp what had been. The fact his Elizabeth had been pregnant by someone else was hard to swallow. What was Matt thinking, pulling away from her after that? That's when she needed her husband the most. That's when a couple should come together and fight for each other. How long after everything had they finally divorced? Why had she stayed there? Why hadn't she gone on to college and started her life?

It didn't add up. He had more questions, but he didn't want to push her for answers. She'd agreed to come over to his place after all these months. He wasn't going to rock the boat.

Elizabeth wasn't sure she was ready to face Colby's family, but his offer to cook food was too sweet to turn down. Walking through the front door of his childhood home was nearly as intimidating as having her father force his way into hers for an introduction.

"Abby? Mama? I'm home," Colby called out as he dropped his keys and reached for her hand.

"Back here. The nurse just left," Abby's voice called out.

Colby led Elizabeth down the hallway to the family room where a hospital bed had been set up in the middle of the large space. Abby sat in a chair next to it. The back of the bed faced the doorway, so Elizabeth didn't get a look at Elaine until Colby moved all the way through the room. When she did her heart broke.

The once-proud woman with hair the color of coal that hung down her back, and baby blue eyes always smiling in spite of her struggles, was now hunched feebly in the bed, a shade whiter than her sheet, staring into space as her body convulsed at random, fighting against her.

"Hi, Elizabeth," Abby offered quietly, nodding her way. It sounded polite enough, but Elizabeth didn't miss the suspicion in the other woman's gaze.

"Hi, Abby, Elaine. It's good to see you both." Elizabeth noted that there was no response from Elaine, and for a moment she considered how hard this whole thing must be on Colby and Abby. It was hard enough to lose a parent, much less to have to sit back and watch them waste away to nothing.

"She's having a bad day today," Abby said despondently, patting her mother's hand gently.

"Did you hear back from any of the facilities?" Colby asked, bending and kissing his mother's forehead. Elaine's eyelids flickered, but otherwise, she didn't react.

"Not yet, but Mark said it might take a few weeks. He's put in a recommendation letter along with her medical records," Abby said, pushing to her feet. "She just had her meds, so she'll be asleep shortly. I'm going to go meet up with some friends for a drink, since you're home."

Colby nodded. "Anything else?"

"Nope." Abby started out the door and then paused. "Oh, I put in for Family Medical Leave because there were hints that if I kept taking time off, I might lose my job. You should probably do the same. Now that Bran is with that girl out there on the ranch, there's no telling what he'll do."

"Destiny is a nice person, Abby, and so is Bran. He'd never fire me for taking care of my mother." Colby rolled his eyes and glared across the room at his sister. "Go take a break. I've got this."

Abby disappeared without another word, and Elizabeth followed Colby back into the kitchen.

"Abby doesn't seem to like Destiny much," she said, trying to get a conversation going. "Or maybe it's the ranch in general?"

"It's Roman she doesn't like, and Franki. She was hooking up with Roman when he met Franki, so she's butthurt that he left her," Colby said, pulling out two pots and filling one with water.

"They weren't in a relationship, though, right? I mean, I remember when Franki came to town, and Abby got in her face. Franki really let her have it. I've never seen anything so funny."

"Abby's just lonely. She's always needed a man in her life to be happy. I think she thought Roman was the one," Colby answered, dumping sauce into the empty pot and turning on the burner. "I hope pasta is okay. It's the one thing I'm good at making-well, besides scrambled eggs."

"Sounds delicious," Elizabeth agreed. "You know, back then I had a bit of a crush on Roman, too."

Colby's shoulders tightened, and he turned to look at her with narrowed eyes. "What?"

"Oh, yeah, I think every woman in Montford had a crush on him at one time or another. It's the hair and his bad boy ways. Who doesn't want a bad boy?" She knew she was egging him on, but she liked the way jealousy glinted in his eyes.

"Really? You think you want a bad boy instead of a sheriff's deputy?" He turned her way and stalked closer with a sexy glint in his eye.

"Every good girl wants a bad boy, Deputy. You know that." She moaned when he tweaked her nipple through her shirt and bra.

"I'll have you know, Roman Freemont has nothing on me, baby. I'll teach you how to play with a bad boy..." he paused, and nipped the skin on her neck. "I can't wait to fuck you in my bed."

Her pussy dripped into her panties, and she squirmed in his arms. "Your mom's here."

"Mama is pretty much catatonic once her meds kick in. She won't hear a thing." He grabbed her ass, and squeezed hard. "Besides, I've been dying to spank this ass, and I think you need a punishment for all this teasing."

Heat rushed through her at the idea of his hands paddling her ass. "Yes!" she whimpered, kissing the underside of his jaw.

He stepped out of her reach so suddenly she wobbled on her feet and glared at him. "Hey!"