"Oh thank G.o.d." Relief floods her face and for the first time, I notice the small wrinkles that line her eyes, intensifying her look of concern.

She's only in her mid-thirties and not a fan of aging. I learned that the hard way when I pointed out she had a gray hair once. She dropped everything and went directly to the salon. Over one gray hair!

She's rich and therefore all about appearances. If I point out the obvious signs that she's getting older, she will be on the phone scheduling Botox before anyone will be able to try and talk some sense into her.

"Cause you know I am way too young to be a grandma." She thinks on the statement. "Great aunt." She tosses it around. "Nope, either way, it just makes me sound old." She wrinkles her little nose in disgust, throwing her light brown hair behind her shoulders.

"Again, not pregnant." I don't try to hide my annoyance over this conversation.

"Then what is it?" She hits me with big hazel eyes; eyes that are almost an exact match to mine. "And don't say it's nothing. We both know you'd be lying."

"How did you know you loved Jack?" I ask, referring to her late husband.

She c.o.c.ks a brow at me and studies me curiously for a long moment before finally answering my question.

"I don't know. How does anyone know they love someone? I think you just know." She shrugs, swirling her manicured fingertip over the rim of her tea gla.s.s. "Why do you ask?" She bolts upright before I have a chance to respond. "Oh. My. G.o.d. Did you meet someone?" She looks at me like I have five heads.

"Why do you seem so surprised?"

"Really?" she blurts sarcastically, crossing her arms over her surgically-modified b.r.e.a.s.t.s as she leans back in the chair. "This from the girl who couldn't stand to go on a date with the same boy twice. I guess I just find it hard to believe that any guy would be special enough to tie you down."

"Two." My voice comes out strained.

"Two?" she questions, clearly not picking up what I'm trying to tell her.

"There are two of them." I bite my bottom lip. Just thinking about my situation makes my stomach want to reject everything I've managed to put in it in the last few minutes.

"Well don't just leave me sitting her in antic.i.p.ation. Tell me everything." She leans forward, resting her elbows on the table in front of her.

She seems overly eager to hear what I have to say. Like a paparazzi waiting for me to reveal some huge celebrity secret that's going to skyrocket their career instantaneously. Oddly enough, though, her reaction somewhat puts me at ease. It's hard enough talking to her about these things. I'm not the most open person. h.e.l.l, I've been seeing Bryan for weeks now and this is the first time I am even mentioning him to her.

Taking a deep breath, the words start flowing from my mouth. Once they do I can't make them stop. They pour from my lips one on top of the other, and before I know it, I have relived every last detail of the last three months out loud, including my last encounter with Gavin three days ago.

"What do you think I should do?" I finally let out a long sigh and relax back into my chair.

"I can't tell you what you should do, but it sounds to me like you already know," she says, taking a long drink of her iced tea.

"No, I don't. That's why I'm asking you," I object.

"It's clear who you want. I'm a firm believer in going with your gut. Had I listened to everyone when they warned me about marrying Jack, I would have missed out on the best ten years of my life. We didn't make sense and most of his family a.s.sumed I was marrying him for his money, but he knew better. He knew I loved him. G.o.d help me did I ever." Her eyes gla.s.s over as she speaks. "Every time that man stepped foot in the same room with me, my body would come to life. Even if I couldn't see him, I could always tell when he was near."

"Gavin." His name falls from my lips without even a thought. The moment it does I want to suck it back in and swallow it down.

I don't want it to be his name that falls from lips- his name makes my heart speed up- his name makes my skin burn. I don't want anything to do with him and yet, he's all I want. I know it without a second thought.

But that doesn't change the way I feel about Bryan, either. Over the last few weeks, I have come to really care for him. He makes me laugh. He holds me when I'm upset. Brings me flowers when I'm sad or stressed. He does everything he can to bring a smile to my face. Something has to be said about that too, right? It can't all be in the physical pull you feel toward someone.

"My advice," Joy interrupts my raging thoughts. "If you're really that torn, talk to Gavin. Feel things out. See where he stands. I can see in the way you speak his name that he has a hold on you. But I also get your reservations about not wanting to throw away what you could have with Bryan over a guy who may or may not want more from you."

"So what are you suggesting? That I just show up wherever he is and demand to know what his intentions are with me? Cause that's not completely desperate or anything." I drop my head into my hands on a frustrated growl.

"All I'm saying is give it time. You don't have to figure it out today. The answer may find you when you least expect it. You can't force these things, no matter how badly you may want to. I know how desperately you need to control this situation, but some things are simply beyond our ability to control."

"Easier said than done," I whine, looking back up to meet her gaze.

"Find the one that speaks to your soul. When you've made your choice, you'll know it. It won't even be a choice anymore."

"G.o.d, who are you and what have you done with Joy? Here I expected some off the wall advice like- like sleep with them both and decide which one's d.i.c.k you like better." I let out on a frustrated groan.

"Well you've already slept with them both," she reminds me, laughing when I give her an evil glare across the table. "I mean, sleep with both of them and find out which one's d.i.c.k you like better." She smiles widely. "Better?"

"Not at all," I laugh, feeling no better about my situation.

"Well when you do, you be sure to call me. And if you need me to check them both out and tell you which one I'd pick, I'd be happy to do that, too." She smiles wickedly. "Does whose d.i.c.k I like better count?"

"Don't be gross." I shake my head, her comment pulling the first real laugh from me in days.

"There she is." She smiles, leaning forward to lay a brief kiss to the top of my head before pushing into a full stand. "I have to go. Maria hates when I'm late." She winks. "Call me."

"I will," I agree, throwing her a small wave as she spins around and walks away.

Knowing I need to get some shopping done to prepare for my upcoming semester which starts in two days, I push into a stand, throwing my long pea coat over my shoulders before grabbing my phone from the table. I no more than get my fingers closed around it when it buzzes to life in my hand, an unknown number dancing across the screen.

I immediately hit ignore. I make it a habit to send any number I don't recognize to voicemail. Sliding it into my jacket pocket, it vibrates again just seconds after I step out onto the sidewalk.

Same number.

"Seriously?" I mutter to myself, once again hitting the ignore b.u.t.ton.

"You know, I don't much like being sent to voicemail." A familiar voice washes over me.

I look up to see Gavin leaning against his truck which is parked on the street directly in front of the sandwich shop.

I suck in a ragged breath at the sight of him. His dark hair is hidden beneath a black beanie. His muscular body accented by a pair of dark jeans and a gray shirt that is only partly visible underneath his black jacket.

"What are you doing here?" The question is off my lips before I've even fully comprehended that he's here.

"I was having lunch with my sister." He points to the little Chinese restaurant to the right of the deli.

"And you just happened to know I was here, how?" I question, not able to chalk this up to coincidence.

"Because I saw you through the window." He points through the large bay window that gives a clear view of the inside of the deli and its patrons.

"How did you get my number?" I bounce to the next question.

"Stole it out of Decklan's phone." He smiles like he's really proud of himself for that one.

"Well, maybe you should have gotten the hint the first time I sent you to voicemail." I shove my phone into my pocket and set off down the sidewalk, knowing he will follow me.

Sure enough, within moments he steps up next to me, matching me stride for stride.

"Do you mind?" I throw him an annoyed glance.

"Not at all." He smiles.

"What do you want?" I stop abruptly, causing a woman walking hand in hand with a small child to sidestep to get past me.

"Now is that any way to talk to a friend?" His lopsided smile may be enough to distract my eyes, but it's not enough to melt my resolve.

"We're not friends." I act bored by this exchange.

"Well, now my feelings are hurt." He huffs, prompting a laugh to bubble in my throat.

"You're really something else, you know that?" I shake my head, not able to rid the smile that has crept its way onto my face.

"What are you doing now?" He's like a curious child playing twenty questions.

"I have a few things to pick up from the store. Anything else you need to know?"

"Want some company?" His offer catches me off guard.

"You want to come to the store with me?" I hit him with a curious look.

"Not really," he answers on a laugh, his cheeks starting to turn red from the cold. "But I do want to spend time with you. So what store are we going to?"

"You have got to be kidding me right now?" I spin around and take off walking again, trying to ignore the fact that he's still directly by my side.

The fates must find some humor in my discomfort because for the life of me I can't figure out why I keep ending up in these ridiculous situations.

Chapter Seven.

Gavin Harlee tries to act like she's annoyed that I chose to follow her into the secondhand bookstore, but the sideways glances she keeps throwing in my direction tell me she's anything but annoyed.

I didn't actually expect my little play on her on New Year's to have such an effect, but it's clear that I have definitely ruffled her feathers a bit. I like that she's agitated. I like that she's frustrated. It will make f.u.c.king her again that much more satisfying. Just the thought of her taking out her frustrations on my back with her nails causes my d.i.c.k to spring to life.

Down boy.

"So what are we looking for?" I shove an old worn book back onto the shelf before turning toward Harlee who pretends not to hear me.

"What are you doing?" She finally spins toward me, tucking the book in her hand under her arm.

"Apparently, I'm shopping for used books," I say, a smile creeping across my face.

"No. I mean what are you really doing? You're not a student. You clearly have no need for used textbooks. You're here to rile me up. Why?" She narrows her eyes at me.

"I'm just catching up with a friend." I shrug casually, picking up another book off the shelf.

"Bulls.h.i.t." She rips the book from my hand, pulling my gaze back toward her. "We aren't friends, so why are you torturing me?"

"I didn't realize I was." Again I keep my tone light and casual.

Her nostrils flare slightly as a frustrated growl breaks from her lips. "Go away, Gavin," she bites, spinning around as she stomps toward the back of the store.

"Is that what you really want?" I ask, stepping up behind her.

"If your plan is to see how far you can push me with your little games until I finally lose it, you've just about succeeded."

"Hey." I grab her shoulder, spinning her toward me. "I'm sorry." All the playfulness is gone this time. "I'm not trying to play games with you."

"No?" she questions. "Because it sure feels like that's exactly what you're doing."

"f.u.c.k." I sigh.

Gripping the bridge of my nose between two fingers, I take a deep inhale. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore," I admit, dropping my hand away. "You make me f.u.c.king crazy."

"I make you crazy?" she bites. "How the h.e.l.l do you think you make me feel? One minute you're all over me, the next it's like I don't exist. Back and forth we go in this endless cycle. I'm starting to think this is fun for you."

"It isn't. You just... f.u.c.k, Harlee, I can't stop thinking about you."

I can see the surprise that flashes across her face for the briefest moment but it's quickly replaced by anger.

"Well that's too f.u.c.king bad, isn't it? You should have thought about that after you blew me off and then treated me the way you did at the cemetery. Let's not forget the bulls.h.i.t you pulled at the New Year's Eve party either."

"Are you really mad that I kissed you that night, or are you just mad that you liked it?" I take a commanding step toward her.

"I'm mad that you wait until I am dating someone else, who I really like by the way, to decide you actually want to have something to do with me." She doesn't pull away when I reach for her hand, pulling it into mine.

"If you liked him that much, you wouldn't have let me kiss you in the first place." I lean in, our faces now so close that a mere two inches separates the distance between us.

It doesn't matter that we're standing in the middle of an old, musty bookstore. It doesn't matter that moments ago she was on the verge of slapping me. It doesn't matter that she's seeing someone who isn't me.

All that matters is the way I feel her hand tremble in mine as I lean down and press my mouth to hers.

It's the softest swipe of my lips against hers, but it does the trick. I can physically feel her resolve melt away. She lets out a small whimper, clearly wanting more. Wrapping my arm around her waist, I settle my hand against the small of her back. Pulling her firmly against me, I deepen the kiss, my clear arousal apparent as it presses into her stomach.

"Gavin, please." She pants as I trail my tongue between the seam of her lips.

"I want you." I grind my erection harder against her. "I want to feel you." I suck her bottom lip into my mouth before slowly pulling away. "Is that clear enough for you?"

She sways slightly, clearly off balance. The realization that I did this to her instantly brings a smile to my face. I've got her. Even if she doesn't want to admit it just yet, I know it.