Shane

Trying to be the good guy is a lot harder than it should be. I want to have her. I need her. Beth should be mine. I want to hold her. I want to touch her - all over. This is bullshit.

I'll just keep reminding myself that it's about the long game. If she's meant to be mine, she will be, and I believe she is.

Knowing that her boyfriend is such a dick is killing me. I want to strangle him for treating her like a piece of shit. If Chad was that open with me, a basic stranger, about his deceptions, he probably only scratched the surface of his web of lies. I hope Tommy will get something solid to use against him.

I hate being 'that guy'. You know, the one who tries to break up a couple to get the girl. That's not really what I'm doing. It was not my intention. Chad is a bad dude. He's legitimately an awful human being. Beth is too good for him. If he doesn't get caught cheating with another woman, he's going to get caught in one of his scams eventually, and that would be detrimental to Beth's career. She could easily go down with him. I believe he's enough of a scumbag to throw her under the bus or take her down with him. Why not? He doesn't seem to care much about anything other than himself.

Don't get me wrong, if Beth came to me, I would take her in a heartbeat. I just don't want to be the one to destroy what she thinks is a perfect relationship with a 'good' guy. Fuck that. I've planted the seeds, now I'll let nature take its course. I only wish it would happen fast. I've got a constant hard on and it's got Beth's name written all over it.

It's not just sexual. That's just only of it. Beth is amazing in every way. The thought of being with her - having her any time I want, her wanting me, it's all I need.

It became pretty obvious at lunch that she feels the same about me. She may not know it yet, but she does. She may not be ready to admit it, even to herself, but it's true. We're going to be together. I feel it in my bones - and my boner. I just hope it happens soon.

It's taking everything I can not to call or even text Beth, but I have to back off. Things already got a little too intense. I don't want to push it. It's only been a couple of days, I'll wait a few more before I reach out, if she doesn't contact me first.

My phone rings as I flip through the channels. It's pretty late so it can't be work. It's Beth. It has to be. Who else would reach out at this time of night?

I pick up my phone without looking at the caller ID, "hey," I smile to myself, waiting to hear Beth's voice on the other line. I'm surprised when I hear Tommy respond instead.

"Shane, you're not going to believe what I found out."

Beth

I feel like a giddy school girl. Having lunch with Shane, at 'our place', was a real eye opener. Maybe my relationship with Chad isn't all I've built it up to be. When was the last time we laughed like that - or even had a real conversation? Come to think of it, when's the last time we had sex? In the Bahamas? Is our relationship only that awesome when we're on vacation but stale when we're not?

Or am I overthinking it? I'm sure after a couple of years with Shane, we would be in a similar kind of rut, right?

Shit. My head is so twisted right now. It has been for days. I've been trying to keep my mind on work, but that lunch date confused the hell out of me. How am I supposed to continue hating Shane when he makes it so easy to love him.

I can't love him, love him, can I? My God, for all I know, he killed someone and left town eight years ago. He could be a total psycho. I know he's not though, as much as I wish he was just so I could forget about him.

I've been walking around in a strange cloud of happiness and confusion. Chad doesn't appear to notice, which is good, but also bad. How does he not see? Or does he see and just not care? Either way, I'm afraid it's a bad sign.

It's been a few days since Shane and I have seen each other. I'm dying to hear from him again. I've almost texted him several times, but thought better of it. I wish he would call me - text me - anything.

I have to meet the newlyweds at their potential home for an inspection today. I don't always go to the home inspections, but I figured it will keep me occupied for a while, so why not.

They're very excited about the house and I don't blame them. They are walking around hand in hand again. They're so in love. I want that. Perhaps when Chad is finished with this project and we take some time for 'us', I'll talk to him about all these little things I feel are missing. If all goes well, he'll agree.

I take a seat in the yard and watch the inspector climb up to the roof line. It's a beautiful day so I might as well enjoy it. I'm scrolling through some emails when my phone rings. Tommy's name is on my screen. I answer quickly. He rarely calls me so I immediately think something is wrong.

"Hey, Tommy. What's up?"

"Hey, Beth. How are you?"

"Same old. You?"

"Same," he hesitates, "are you free later?"

"Sure, why? You wanna hang out?" I ask with a nervous laugh.

"Yeah. I want to show you something."

"What's up, Tommy? You hardly ever call me and we almost never hang out without an occasion."

"Just come with me tonight. I'll explain everything."

"Dude. Come on. What's going on?"

"I don't want to talk about it over the phone."

"You're making this sound a little scary."

"Nothing to be scared of little sis. I'll pick you up around seven."

"Um, okay," I reply unsure. What the hell is going on?

I run through dozens of scenarios through my head. Each one is worse than the last. I'm comforted only by the fact that if something happened to one of my parents or Abby, he wouldn't be waiting all day to tell me - or show me.

It's got to be something to do with Shane. What else could it be?

______________.

I impatiently wait for Tommy to pick me up. I put on jeans and a tee shirt and eat a little something. I'm not sure where we're going or what to expect. He literally gave me no information. Leave it to a detective to make things covert and mysterious. He could very well be making a big deal about nothing.

I pace back and forth in my living room, keeping an eye on the window for headlights. I've had several false alarms already as each of my neighbors has come and gone.

Just before seven, a set of headlights stops in front of my house. I grab my bag and a sweater, reaching the door at the same time as Tommy. I pull it open and he is standing on the other side, poised and ready to knock, but I was too quick.

"Hey, Beth. Looks like you're ready to go," Tommy quips looking me up and down.

"Um, yeah. Thanks to your cryptic conversation this afternoon, I've been walking on egg shells all day. Let's go." I step out and close the door behind me.

We walk silently to the car. The sun is laying low in the sky. It will be dark any minute. Tommy pulls away from the curb.

"So where are we going?" I ask.

"I want to show you something."

"So you said," I roll my eyes, "what the fuck? Why are you being so secretive?" I ask, irritation in my voice.

"Some things are better when they're seen. There would be too many questions if I told you. You also may not believe me. I have a lot of experience with this, Beth, just trust me."

"Is it Shane?" I ask, suddenly worried that he left again.

"Shane? What? No."

"I know he's back, Tommy. I saw him. He told me you guys spoke."

"Yeah. We've been in touch. It's crazy, but I don't want to hate him anymore. I don't care that he left - or why. I'm happy to have him back," Tommy admits.

"That's great. I still think he has a lot of explaining to do," I reply, "do you trust him? Do you really think he's here to make things right?"

"I do now. I wasn't sure at first. I still have some hesitations of course, but I think he's still the same person he was then - honest and open. He was always a good guy. He just got mixed up in some bad situations. It happens. Shit - if it wasn't for us, who knows what would have happened to him."

Tommy. My other voice of reason. So quick to forgive and forget. He's a very good judge of character - he has to be. Maybe my wanting to believe in Shane isn't the worst idea.

"I'm hungry. I'm going through the drive thru. Want anything?" Tommy asks.

"I'm okay."

We wait in the drive thru line which feels like it's moving in extra slow motion tonight. We finally get to the front and pay. Tommy places the bag on the center console. I reach in the bag and grab a fry.

"Some things never change. Glad I got an extra large order."

"Come on," I whine, "how long until we get to this secret place?"

"Not too long. Just a few more minutes."

We drive in silence. I change the radio station a few times to occupy myself. I'm not asking anymore questions because I already know I'm not getting anymore answers. Seems like I've been doing a lot of this lately.

After several minutes, Tommy pulls over on one of the main roads just outside of Park City. We're parked on the street in front of a park. The opposite side of the street is lined with apartment buildings. Tommy takes the bag of food and opens it on his lap. He proceeds to open ketchup packets and dress his burger.

"Are you serious right now?" I ask, annoyed.

"I told you I was hungry."

"What the fuck are we doing here? Enough, Tommy."

He takes a large bite of his burger, washes it down with a gulp of soda.

"Look, Beth, you know I love you, right?"

"Yes, what? You're scaring me."

"I have to tell you something that might be a little unpleasant. I thought it would be best for you to hear from me."

I'm shaking. "Stop fucking sugar coating it and talk."

Tommy takes a deep breath, "see that building? The one with the fancy columns?"

"Yes."

"Chad has an apartment there."

"Okay." I didn't know he still had his own place. It's strange but not worthy of all this private eye stuff, "and?"

"Well, he spends a lot of time there."

"Fuck, Tommy, what are you saying?"

"Here we go. Just on time - as he always is."

I follow Tommy's gaze to the opposite corner. Chad is walking with another woman. They're laughing and by the way they're carrying themselves, I'm pretty positive they're drunk. She's draping herself all over him. It's disgusting.

They proceed to the building entrance and walk in like they own the place. Not a care in the world. No worry of a girlfriend who might be waiting in the dark to spot them. No concern for who might see them.

I'm speechless. Oddly, I have no tears. Instead, anger and hate are coursing through my veins. I want to kill him.

"Are you okay?" Tommy asks.

"No. I am far from okay."

"I figured this might hurt, Beth. That's why I wanted to be here. I thought you may need to see for yourself."

"How long?"

"How long what?"

"How long have they been seeing each other?"

Tommy takes another deep breath. He reaches into the back seat and pulls out an envelope. "I'm not sure. I've only been watching for about a week. She's not the only one."

He unfastens the clip, removes some photos, and passes them to me. I flip through, each one making me more disgusted. There are 'only' two other women - or maybe one is the same as tonights' whore. I don't know and right now, I don't care. It doesn't matter. One, ten, it's all the same. Chad's a cheater and a liar. I feel like a fool.

"How did you find out?" I ask, "what made you decide to tail him?"

"I got a tip."

"A tip? From who? Who else knows?" I'm mortified. Who else knows or cares about Chad enough to get involved.

"I'd rather not say."

"Shane. It's fucking Shane. I know it is."