______.

As I approach the room, I hear the sound of a guitar being strummed from outside the closed door. I clutch the door handle, but I don't turn it. I recognize the tune - 'Forever Girl.' I stand there, still, unable to move. My heart stops. I can't face him now - I can't.

I wait until the music stops. I hear voices and come back to my senses. I slowly remove my hand from the door and catch my breath. I quickly walk away back down the hall before anyone sees me. There is no way I can face Steele. Not now.

I make my way back to the main area back stage and try to get lost in the commotion. I position myself behind a tall stack of speakers. No one notices me for a while, which is exactly what I was hoping for.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in."

The sound of that voice goes through me like nails on a chalkboard. I know who it is without looking up. I'm not going to give her the satisfaction of acknowledging that she's speaking to me. The only thing worse than having an enemy, is an enemy that has exactly what they need to destroy you.

"Are you going to pretend I'm not here?" Jasmine scoffs.

I look up, trying to seem unperturbed, "oh, did you say something?"

"I sure did."

I shrug innocently, "what's up?"

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Excuse me?" I ask, matching her snide tone.

"What? Are you gonna fire me too?"

"If you continue to speak to me like that, I might," I challenge her.

"You had no right to fire Jesse. He's one of the best guys we have. You did that to spite me, didn't you?"

What?

"What are you talking about?"

I honestly have no idea why she would think that. I'm a professional, not captain of the cheer squad in high school. Then again, she did catch me behaving pretty unprofessionally. Shit, what did I get myself into?

"You fired Jesse because of what I told you about Steele and I. You couldn't let me go, so that was the next best thing you could do to fuck me over," she spews, "you like fucking people, don't you?"

'Firecracker' was a severe understatement on Steve's part. This girl is straight up evil.

I take a deep breath. I need to handle this like a woman, although every bone in my body is aching to rip her hair out.

"Jasmine, I know you're mad, so I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that," I start. She folds her arms. "I let Jesse go because someone needed to be cut and he refused to do what he was asked. He might still be here if he had chosen to cooperate. I wouldn't make that kind of decision based on my feelings for you," I explain as calmly as I can.

"Honestly, it doesn't matter what your reasons are. I'm going to make sure your boss - and everyone else - knows what a whore you are."

"Do what you must," I say cooly, but on the inside, my stomach turns.

Jasmine can say whatever she wants, but the fact that she has actually seen Steele and I together gives her more credit. She could really ruin me. I could lose my job and more importantly, my reputation. I would become a laughing stock in the business. I know because I've seen it happen before. Fuck.

"I will. Trust me. You fucked with the wrong girl," Jasmine finishes. She eyes me up and down one last time before walking away.

She didn't give me time to respond which is a good thing because I'm speechless. What the fuck am I going to do? I need to do some damage control - maybe take an offensive strategy and approach Jayne before Jasmine can get to her - but what am I going to say?

This day is turning out to be quite the clusterfuck. I have to break things off with Steele and also explain what happened to my boss without losing my job. If I don't tread carefully, I could lose it all. ________ I manage to evade Jasmine for the rest of the afternoon. I'm sure she's doing her best to stay away from me as well. I haven't seen Steele either and I don't want to. I decided to wait until after the show to talk to him. No sense in risking throwing him off his game before a performance.

I make a quick decision. I can't even justify it to myself, but I follow my gut and just go with it.

I find Steve near craft services. He's holding a sandwich of some sort, but pacing back and forth, not really eating it. He doesn't notice me.

"Hey, Steve," I say trying to get his attention.

"Oh, hi Annika." He seems lost in his own thoughts.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm really nervous about Steele's opening set. His fans expect to hear the usual line up - the one posted on every website and fan page. He's throwing a loop opening with one of his old originals."

"I wouldn't worry too much about it, Steve. His fans love him. I don't think one alteration is going to change that."

The look on his face says otherwise, "I don't know, people can be so fickle. You know how it is."

I do. "Look on the bright side, any press is good press. If anything, it will only bring more attention to Steele Rush."

"Yeah," he agrees, but he obviously doesn't mean it. "I'm going to find Steele before they take the stage. I'll see you in a bit." He starts to walk away but I stop him.

"Steve."

"Yes?"

"I have to leave."

"Oh! You're going to miss the show. Is everything okay? Will I see you at the hotel later?"

"Yes...No," I'm tongue tied. I hadn't thought this all the way through, "I'm fine. They need me back in the office first thing in the morning," I lie, "I have to catch a flight tonight. The concert will be amazing. Don't sweat it." I haven't attempted to call the airline yet, but if I have to sit in the airport to stay the hell out of dodge, I will.

"We'll see. When will I see you again?"

Maybe never.

"I'm not sure. I'll check back in with you. My work here is done - for the most part anyway."

"Did you get to say goodbye to everyone?"

I think of Steele and how he's going to feel when he finds out I left.

"No. Please wish them my best," I say solemnly, "and say goodbye to Steele for me after the show."

"Sure. It's been great seeing you again. Safe travels."

Steve surprises me with a quick hug, "hope to see you again."

"Me too." I really do. Steve's a great guy and a pleasure to work with. Seeing him again would also mean I still have my job. "Hope all goes well tonight."

We say our farewells and set out to look for a way out of the arena. I keep my head down, trying not to run into anyone on my way out. I make it all the way to the back entrance undetected. I smile and nod at the large security guards near the door. One of them pushes the large metal door and holds it open for me.

I take a deep breath, inhaling the night air. I see the throngs of people gathered in the area out beyond the fenced area. I begin to walk, no clue where I'm going. Normally, I'm a planner, but I hadn't thought this through at all. I take out my phone to see if I can find an Uber close by.

"Annika!"

I stop dead in my tracks.

"Annika, wait."

Heavy footsteps quickly make their way right behind me.

"Were you really going to leave without saying goodbye?"

I finally turn around and face Steele, but I have no words. Coward that I am, I was hoping to just disappear. Again.

"I..." Nothing I say is going to be easy.

"You can't fucking do this," Steele says. He's commanding, more than pleading with me.

I look at him. He looks so sexy, standing there in his worn out jeans and black tee shirt. His head is tilted to the side and his hair falls over part of his face. My mouth turns down at the look of despair on his face.

"I have to go. I have to get back to work."

"Right now?"

"Yes," I reply. There's no conviction in my voice.

"Bullshit."

He knows I'm lying. There's only one reason I'm leaving and he's standing right in front of me. I look down at the ground.

"When are you going to stop running away?"

"I'm not."

"You are."

I turn my eyes up to look at him. They're welling up with tears, but I don't want him to see.

"Why can't you just admit that you have feelings for me? Why is that so hard?"

"Steele, I've told you a million times before."

"Tell me again," he challenges.

I take a deep breath and try to compose myself. I can't cry. I have to be strong. I have to get out of here. I can't look at Steele without wanting to jump into his arms, but that's just not possible.

"I can lose my job," I say simply.

"So what? Get a new one. Better yet - don't work. Come with me. Be my girl."

There it is.

"I can't, Steele. That's not reality. You know what happened with my parents. I watched it all unfold before me and ruin their lives - and mine."

"We're not your parents, Annika."

"But we are. Can't you see?" Bringing up my past changes my hurt to anger. It's not directed at Steele, but I can't hold it back any longer. "My parents were so in love. My mother idolized my father. She put him up on a pedestal - and he did the same to her," I take a breath, "when my father's band made it big and started touring, it ruined everything. My mother left everything behind - even me - to follow him. My father begged her not to - knowing that she would be giving up her career and raising her own child, but she did it."

Noting how upset I'm getting, Steele puts his hand on my arm in a calming gesture. I don't shrug him away.

"Then, my dad got so wrapped up in his rock star life, he started partying and drinking excessively. He started having sex with groupies every chance he had - which was often. Even when my mother was around."

Tears begin falling from my eyes as I recall my childhood. Having my grandparents raise me for that time - overhearing all the talk about my parents - was not pleasant for a little girl. Depending on which set of grandparents I was with, that would determine who I was hearing stories about. Not that it mattered - they were equally as awful.

"In response, my mother started drinking heavily too. She became a groupie in her own right. She gave up on my father, but not the rock star life." I wipe the tears from my face. Steele remains silent so I can continue. "At first she left me for short weekends. Then longer. It became days and weeks at a time. My father came to his senses eventually. He realized the error of his ways. He loved her. He loved me. He wanted to try and rebuild his family, but it was too late."

Steele pulls me into his arms, trying to calm me down, but it feels good to finally get this off my chest. I never told anyone the whole story before. I need to finish.

"My mother loved 'the life' more than us. She never looked back. She went from a hard working career woman, to a drunk, and eventually - a junkie. She died of an overdose in a hotel room while she was following another band's tour."

"Annika, I didn't know," Steele says quietly, "I mean, I knew some of that, but..."

"I know. It's fine."

He strokes the top of my head. I lean into his shoulder.

"My father left his tour. He left his own band to make things right. It was just...it was too late for her."

I sob. I don't want to, but I can't stop myself. Steele continues to pet my hair.

"I just can't do this, Steele. I can't," I say through tears.

"You're not your mother, Annika, and I'm not your father," he says softly.

"How do you know? She wasn't like that either. What if I give it all up and the same thing happens to us?"

"What if it doesn't?"

"Steele!" one of the bouncers yells, "they're looking for you. Show's getting ready to start. You need to get in here."

My heart sinks. This is it. It's now or never. I know what I have to do.

"Annika, just come back inside. Think about this before you leave."