It's like you've become a whole different person lately.

Not all of me. Just the Bree part.

Not all the time.

Just with the monster.

Did something happen at your dad's?

Like he wanted to hear about Dad.

Like he really wanted to know he and Mom were 100% right on.

Don't take this wrong, okay?

You aren't doing drugs, are you?

What was I supposed to do- admit it? I shook my head in hearty denial.

I know adolescence is a time for experimentation...

Oh, yes, he knew. And my mom did too. Dad told me all about how they used to get high together.

but I hope you'll think twice before you do. You've got a lot to lose.

I bit my lip, filled my eyes with innocence, let it encourage tears.

"I know, Scott. I promise to think twice."

He Talked at Me Awhile Longer

I smiled, nodded, apologized for my foul temper and angry words, protested when it seemed I ought to and somehow managed to avoid GUFN.

When he left, I patted myself on the back for a game well played, snitched open the door and tiptoed down the hall to eavesdrop on the kitchen conversation.

Mom and Scott believed they'd bitten the bullet.

Little did they know I hadn't yet fired off the full round.

The Next Few Days

I Gave Up the Bus

in favor of rides with Robyn, with a detour or two along the way to indulge in some Homework Helper.

(Like it really helped!) A couple of afternoons she had cheerleading practice.

(How could she do back flips and cartwheels without killing herself?) Those days, Chase came by to take me home and stop by the park for a good long make-out session.

I invited him to share my stash.

He took a snort or two, but declined the tinfoil routine.

I let him get away with it the first time.

On his second refusal, I asked why not.

He shrugged.

I've set boundaries.

I Meant

to a.n.a.lyze Chase's limits that very weekend, to learn just how far I could stretch him at the edges, to judge how wide I might warp his self-imposed morality.

Don't ask me why I felt the incredible need to test this person that meant so very much to me, to fathom his most personal thoughts, coolly dissect his psyche.

I only know it was on the table for that Sat.u.r.day until fate intervened.

Okay, the Air Races Intervened

September is Air Race month in Northern Nevada-four fabulous days of warbirds, jets, and homebuilt aircraft, racing wingtip to wingtip, b.a.l.l.s out, around pylons.

It's a must-see event, and we'd made it a family event every single year since Jake was a tiny baby, snoozing soundly in his stroller, despite ear-splitting military flybys.

We always went on weekends and I always begged for more, so it would have looked pretty d.a.m.n suspicious to say I didn't want to go. Besides, I did want to go. I just wanted to go high.

So when Mom reminded us at dinner that we'd have to get up early and dress in layers, I cleared my throat as if to protest.

Instead I asked if I could invite my friend Robyn to come along.

Again, I'd made the perfect preemptory strike. Mom was so happy I would partic.i.p.ate without incident that she not only gave her blessing, but let me ride in Robyn's car.

Robyn Was Game

Scott's company had box seats and plenty of tickets. Robyn got comp tix, with a can't-beat view.

But that was only for starters.

You bet I'll go. Those flyboys are soooooo cute!

You can guess what we did on the drive north of town. We arrived, diamond-eyed, behind dark sungla.s.ses.

Aviator gla.s.ses. Ha! Hope those pilots aren't as wired as I am.

I hoped so, too. We sauntered down the flight line in tight jeans and tiny tank tops, turning more than a few heads.

You'd think they'd never seen girls before. Maybe they think we're lezes.

You thought I was a vamp!

I couldn't come close to Robyn. Even Bree had to work hard to keep up.

Wanna give 'em a show?

Have you ever kissed a girl?

The only girls I'd ever kissed were relatives, and only lip-to-cheek.

Lip locking another female? Never!

And in public? No way!

Come on. It's just for fun. Promise not to slip you the tongue.

OMG. If I hadn't been so wound, I would have died on the spot.

Instead, I jumped right into Robyn's shameless game.

Wolf Whistles

made me pull away, completely red-faced, but LMAO.

(You do know what that means, right?) Okay, my a-double-s was still attached, but I couldn't quit laughing.

(In retrospect, it wasn't that funny.) At the time, it seemed like the funniest thing I'd ever done.

(What's the funniest thing you've ever done?) Don't get me wrong.

I'm completely hetero, and that experience proved it to me.

(I decided that later, when I had much too much time on my hands to think about such things.) But seeing the look on people's faces-some horrified, some fascinated- made my day.

(How would you look, seeing two pretty teenaged girls making out, right there on the tarmac?)

We Found Our Box

took seats behind Mom, Scott, Jake, and a couple of guys Scott worked with. Robyn nudged me as Mom leaned over, showing off cleavage to the cute young blond.