He tried to turn away as he replied that he had often heard her whispering to herself.

"Frank," said I, detaining him, "tell me, do you think her dangerously ill?"

"Oh, no, not now!"

But I insisted upon knowing the worst, and seeing my fears were fully aroused, he confessed that he had been anxious about her cough. "I would give a good deal to know," said he, as if speaking to himself; "whether her family were consumptive."

"Husband," said I, catching hold of his arm, "I had really forgotten that the child was not my own;" and then the word _consumptive_ struck like a fearful knell upon my heart.

"Cora," said the Doctor, "you take it too seriously. Pauline has always appeared to have an excellent const.i.tution; I really am not at all sure that this is not the remains of the measles, only aggravated from other causes. I intend to take her out in the open air, just as soon as these bleak winds have gone." On the whole I felt relieved by this conversation.

_Tuesday, March 7th._

Joseph Morgan has come to make the long promised visit. He has become very much attached to his cousin Emily, and seems to feel that as he must have fun with somebody, it will be safer to take one who has no husband to call him to account. Sister, I will venture to say, has not laughed so much for a long, _long_ time. He has evidently indulged no small curiosity to see Pauline; but though he will not of course say anything to wound my feelings, yet it was plain enough to see, he thought much more of a lively game at romps with Walter, than he did of trying to draw out Pauline, timid and retiring, as she always appears before strangers.

The little fellow will not allow his cousin one moment's peace when in the house. He creeps across the floor in a twinkling, climbs up to Joseph's knee, and by expressive pulls and gestures, signifies his wish that his cousin should instantly get down upon the carpet for a play. If this goes on, I shall soon be obliged to have new furniture. Chairs and lounges tumble over, and my work-basket has received a terrible wound in the side, through which I am constantly losing scissors, thimble, and cotton. Joseph expresses great sorrow, but in ten minutes does the same again. I try to look grave, and call Ann to put the room in order; but before I am aware, I am laughing until the tears roll down my cheeks.

_Monday, March 20th._

Pauline has become quite free with her cousin, and goes directly to him when he calls her to sit on his knee. It is amusing to hear him talk with her. While with every one else he will have his joke, so that Caesar opens his mouth to its fullest extent in antic.i.p.ation, yet with Pauline he is grave and gentle, and never makes fun of what she says. He told me once, when she was absent from the room, that he must mind his ps and qs, for he heard her telling Phebe part of a foolish story, he had told Emily in her hearing. Phebe laughed as if she did not believe it, when Pauline said earnestly, "You mustn't laugh, Phebe, my cousin said so."

Phebe said, "Oh! misse, he's only fooling."

Pauline didn't understand that, and turning around saw him. "Here he is!" she exclaimed triumphantly, "will you please tell Phebe, you did say that."

Joseph confessed he was decidedly confused. "She looked so earnest and solemn with those large eyes of hers. I wouldn't like her to catch me fibbing. I couldn't look her in the face for a month. By the way, coz, have you ever found out her parentage? She speaks when occasion requires, like a princess. You should have heard her reprove Phebe for laughing."

I hinted to Joseph that I disliked to hear any allusion to Pauline's parentage.

"It is a great wonder," said he, "that I did not blab it right out."

_Tuesday, March 21st._

To-day has been mild and pleasant as summer. Joseph, who is a skilful equestrian, rode up to the door, waiting for Caesar to bring the riding whip. Pauline stood with her little face pressed close to the window, at the imminent hazard of flattening her nose. Joseph motioned to me to throw up the sash. I did so, setting down the child from the chair.

"Let Pauline come," said he.

I shook my head.

"It will do her good; the day is delightful; dress her warm, and let her come. I'll bring her back safely."

I turned in doubt to the child, when she put her hand in mine, while a bright flush pa.s.sed over her face. "Please, mamma," she said, "I should like to go with my cousin."

This decided me, and nodding a.s.sent from the window, I hastened to prepare her for the ride. Caesar took her in his arms and gave her to Joseph; but he was not yet ready. He asked Caesar, if there were not somewhere about the premises, a soft cushion suitable for a princess to ride upon.

Pauline gave him a quick look from under her long lashes.

"Well," said he, correcting himself--"for a nice little girl." He gently placed her before him, held her tightly with one arm, and nodding adieu, they rode away. But Joseph forgot himself again before he reached the gate, and shouted back, "You need not expect us till night."

"Oh! please cousin don't stay so long, mamma would be very anxious,"

and she looked distressed.

Joseph turned the horse at once, rode back to the door where we still stood looking after them, and motioning me to come to the step, said, "We shall probably be absent about half an hour."

I smiled.

"Dear coz," he resumed, "I hope you'll have something warm for me when I return. I fancy, I shall be black and blue inside here, trying to conform my conversation to my companion's strict sense of propriety."

It was nearly an hour, however, before they returned, and Pauline's eyes were so bright, her cheeks and lips so red that I gazed at her with admiration. When in answer to my question, whether she had enjoyed herself, she replied that she had had a beautiful time, and that her cousin "talked to her so good." He said with a bow, "I am more than repaid for all my efforts at self-control."

_Thursday, March 23d._

Another beautiful day, and another ride for Pauline. Her father is much encouraged already. She ate with more appet.i.te yesterday than since her sickness. We have elected Joseph a.s.sistant physician to the Doctor, and he is to take the patients to ride when that is prescribed.

He said, "I always knew that sometime or other, the right kind of employment would come to me, if I only had patience to wait for it. Now duty and inclination point the same way, my course is clear." Instead of a sign, Joseph is to take Pauline upon the horse, and ride back and forth through the town, when he has no doubt applications will flow in upon him like a flood.

Though this dear cousin is to appearance such a harum-scarum sort of a fellow, yet I feel a.s.sured he is not without his serious moments, when he realizes that it is "not all of life to live." How can it be otherwise, educated as he has been. From his birth, daily prayer has been offered in his behalf. I am well convinced, that he often puts on this kind of foolery, as he calls it, for a cover to deeper feelings. I told him to-day that Pauline, (who always frames her own pet.i.tions,) had prayed for him, and thanked G.o.d for giving her such a nice cousin, and letting her take such beautiful rides. I told him I sometimes heard her whispering to herself when she took a tiny chair her father gave her, "thank you G.o.d for my pretty chair."

Joseph looked very serious and said, "I should value her prayers far more than those of many professing Christians I could name. Why, coz,"

he added after a pause, "I never saw such a little matter of fact thing in my life. If she goes on so, I prophesy people around her will have to walk straight. I thought at first that she was tame; but she has plenty of spirit, only that she keeps it under control. Yes," he added, warming with the subject, "I have seen her eye flash, and her cheeks burn for an instant, and then it would all be over, and she would speak in the gentlest, sweetest voice imaginable. It sounds like Italian music."

_Friday, March 24th._

This morning after prayers, cousin came to the nursery door and knocked.

I was hearing Pauline repeat her letters, after which I often tell her a Bible story. He sat down quietly until I had finished. "Cousin Cora,"

said he, "I don't believe I shall ever be good; I've tried, and tried, since I have been here; I resolve every night I will be better, but I go on just the same."

I confess that for a moment, I did not know what reply to make. Pauline had not left my side; she opened wide her large eyes, and looked first at me and then at her cousin. After a moment, she walked across to the place where he sat and put her hand in his. "Dear cousin, if you pray to G.o.d, he will tell you how to be good, and mamma will pray for you."

The tears started to Joseph's eyes, as he kissed the little hand in his, and went quickly out of the room.

An hour or two afterward, two young gentlemen from the village called to invite him to join them in an excursion to the lake. I was much pleased with this attention to my cousin, and accepted their invitation in his name. But to my astonishment Joseph, when sent for from the cottage, declined the courtesy with many thanks, upon the plea of a previous engagement. I looked at him for an explanation, little thinking the promise of a ride he had made Pauline, would be in his mind a sufficient excuse.

He read my look. "You know, Cora," he said, turning to me, "it would be awkward for me to be sued for a breach of promise."

The young gentlemen soon departed to join their party, and he turned to leave the room. "I cannot bear to have you give up so pleasant an excursion," said I, detaining him, "especially on Pauline's account. I had just before you came in, told them you would be delighted to accompany them."

"I should be far more delighted," he answered, "to give my sweet little cousin pleasure, and I had promised her the ride." No more was said at the time. Caesar led the horse around to the door, ready saddled and cushioned; and the child was almost in an ecstasy of delight. She had really begun to look like her former self, and my hopes rose high for her permanent recovery. She looked really brilliant as she stood equipped waiting for Joseph; her eyes danced with joy, and her whole face was radiant with happiness.

"Am I not well paid, coz?" said the young man glancing at the little figure before him.

"You are very kind," I replied, "I shall not soon forget it."

A shade pa.s.sed over his face, and he turned back as if about to speak, but checked himself, and taking Pauline in his arms, placed her on the horse, then with a light bound sprang to her side and rode away. The weather is still mild and warm, and as Ann was busy, I took Walter in his wagon, and drew him around the garden, calling at grandmamma's. The young lad began to be very sleepy, and I was about returning to the house, when the equestrians returned. Joseph left Pauline inside the door, and Caesar coming forward to lead the horse, he hastened to meet me.