Volume 17, Chapter 2: Unavoidable Path, Part 1

At 5:30 I was waiting for Yousuke after coming home. I got a notice from my phone.

Can I visit?

A message came with a cute cat sticker from my girlfriend Kei.

The time I arranged with Yousuke was 7:30. Shes quite early.

While were at it, wanna eat together?

She added a postscript before I could reply. Looks like she actually wanted to eat dinner together.

In reply to Keis message, I briefly said thats fine.

Then Ill have to make something.

I could take out leftovers from yesterday, but if I were to make something quickly that Kei would like

I opened the fridge and stared at it while thinking. A chime rang out.

When I opened my door, Kei was smiling broadly.

Though I was a bit surprised, I didnt panic as I invited her in.

It was important how since our relationship was now public, she didnt have to be careful about when she entered my room.

Youre really fast.

As she took off her shoes, Kei entered my room with practiced movements.

I messaged you before I entered the elevatooor.

It seemed that she wanted to visit me while I was here with the arrangement being secondary.

I quickly gave up on preparing something and sat down on the floor next to the table with Kei.

Recently Ive been as familiar with Kiyotakas room as I am with my own room. Maybe because Im here all the time.

Thats good. I dont get invited to your room though.

Eh, ehh? Thats a little embarrassing well, someday if I feel like it!

She didnt give me a direct yes. A girls room would feel different.

Lets not follow that line of thought too far.

Come to think of it, what did you say about our relationship?

To the girls? Theyre taking it more smoothly than I thought. I mean nevermind.

She stopped as she was about to say something. I was a little curious so I tried pressing her.

What?

Like, you know? Hirata Yousuke kinda has his own brand. There are a lot of girls saying its a waste.

I see. They dont understand why shed go out of her way for a guy with no brand.

Indeed, if you compare Yousuke and I then its no wonder that sort of thing comes up.

Im offended too in a way. Even though I broke it off with Yousuke-kun, its as if theyre implying I got rejected.

If she switched to a guy with no brand, then theres nothing to be done about that misunderstanding.

But thats only a part of it. Your reputation has been going up like a conger eel.

Its just eel. How did you make that mistake?

Youd think it was on purpose. When I thought that, Kei grinned.

Even I know that muuuch.

You must have an excellent tutor.

I always thank you, teacher. Ive been getting more points because of our secret lessons.

Kei has been increasing her academic skill little by little. By September, it had reached C with a 48 on the OAA.

She had finally acquired the normal amount of knowledge for a student.

After such a trifling chat, I stood up again and headed towards the fridge.

Im thinking about making omurice or something. Wanna eat?

I asked without turning around. Kei happily raised her voice right away.

Ill eat! Please make the ketchup a little strong, chef.

This isnt my first time treating Kei to a handmade meal like this.

Ive had a few opportunities to prepare meals for her in my room every now and then since we started going out.

Kei still hasnt really shown herself cooking for me, but I dont really mind.

When it comes to making something you want to make, it doesnt make a difference whether youre a man or a woman.

I dont hate making food. Kei herself happily eats it.

Kei loves talking while Im not very good at it. Shes good at talking to me, and she livens up the place. We support each other and achieve balance well.

I take out eggs, ketchup, chicken meat and butter from the fridge. Once I get the cooking oil from the shelf, all the preparations are made. Then I take out some frozen cooked rice and start thawing it in the oven. While that happens I prepare onions. I really wanted to put carrots and other things too. Its a shame that theres no stock. Just when I put the onions on top of the cutting board and picked up a knife, I felt something behind me. Kei snuggled up tightly to my back.

What are you doing?

It was somewhat dangerous, so I stopped moving and asked.

Just looking-

Is what Kei said, but she shouldnt be able to do that because the side of her face is stuck to my back.

Dont mind me. Im just staring.

Okay, got it.

For the time being I ignore her and continue my work as she told me to. I cut the onions into 5mm cubes on the board. While I did that, Kei stuck to my back the whole time without ever separating. I reached out to the bowl so I could crack the eggs when Kei put her arms around my waist and hugged me.

What are you doing now?

Nn-? Im just looking-

I really dont think youre just looking though? This is more like sabotage.

I wont go so far as to caution her away, but she doesnt seem to realize that my work efficiency is somewhat dropping.

Ah-, happiness. Is there anything as happy as this?

She muttered as she put more force into the arms that hugged me. She seems content.

Thats a very cheap happiness. Isnt there a more extravagant happiness? Like buying or watching what you want.

Thats not enough at all.

I didnt say it well just now, but there is, isnt there?

Nuh-uh, none. Even if there was, I dont want it. Im satisfied with this happiness here.

If shes satisfied with something like this, then I dont really have much more to say.

Can I continue cooking?

Sure enough, it would be very inconvenient to keep this stance.

Eh~? What to do~?

She peeked at me with sparkling eyes and a smile.

If I behave, Id want a reward-?

There is chocolate in the fridge.

Buuu. Not like that youre kinda off. Though thats like you. Ill wait quietly theeen.

As if she had found something that satisfied her from within, Kei separated herself and sat on my bed.

Now then, it looks like Ill be able to devote myself to making omurice for now.

Kei looked between her phone and the TV as she waited for the meal to be finished. We sat around the table and had dinner a little earlier than usual.

Now that I think about it-, about Shinohara.

I didnt particularly change the topic, but Kei started talking.

I was wrong too, but it looks like that expos was pretty effective. She hasnt even been listening to my calls.

Beauty depends on the taste and sense of the beholder, but those who are usually considered superior have expressed disregard for someone who is usually considered inferior. That in itself is not rare. You can see it anywhere.

There are also many cases where people say things not out of malice but simply because it entered their mind.

Do you girls hate Shinohara?

Not at all. Shinohara-san is an interesting kind of girl, and shes good at livening up a place.

I see. So thats why you made fun of her and Ike.

Maybe. We laughed at things that would hurt her if she heard them.

She muttered sorrily as if she was reflecting.

Do you hate me for saying something so mean?

People say bad things about other people. I have no intention of denying that. Though there are differences in scale, its harder to find someone who never says anything bad about other people.

The upperclassmen at my club are oppressive and I dont like it. I hate self-important teachers. Its okay to say those things once or twice at the appropriate place and time. Making fun of looks or nitpicking their intellect. There are times when it goes too far, but as youd expect its not unusual for people to say such things.

But fundamentally, having the person herself hear about it is the one thing you must avoid.

Yeah.

This was an exception among exceptions. It mustve been a shock that Kushida leaked it. Which means talking about it to anyone always presents a risk.

Obviously, Shinohara must have been deeply hurt when she heard from Kushida that she was being gossiped about for her looks.

Thats not all. Friends who dont hold a bad impression towards Shinohara, Shinoharas lover: Ike, and Ikes friends. Those people obviously wont think well of Kei and her friends.

This time it was Shinohara. But next time people might gossip about Kei, Matsush*ta or Mori.

Once a chain reaction is set off, it takes considerable labor to stop.

Anyway, youre not just telling me youre sorry, are you? What is it?

Ive also heard a little from Matsush*ta, but I needed to hear it from Kei as well.

This misunderstanding I mean, this damage, Ive tried to settle it with words a few times. Right now I feel like I have no one to turn.

You mean nowhere to turn.

Thats right th-that was on purpose okay?

I really was mistaken.

Kei and her friends have more or less been trying to repair their damaged relationship with Shinohara themselves.

So then, how do you think we can reconcile?

Are you asking me?

Of course. Kiyotaka could probably think of a good plan.

There was no breakthrough in sight right now. Kei and Yousuke were facing the same problem.

Im thinking. Give me some more time.

For now I tell her that and postpone my answer.

Hold on, this is a different topic, but can I ask something a little weird?

She looked up at me and inquired with a face brimming with curiosity.

In the special exam, didnt you have Sakura expelled on the basis of the OAA? If-

When she met my eyes, Kei lost her words.

Its fine. Never mind.

Are you curious about what Id do if you were at the bottom of the OAA?

Kei blatantly widened her eyes.

I said this with Ike too. If your grades are similar then friends make an overwhelming difference. I wouldnt expel you.

Then, what if I had no friends? What if my status was low with the girls?

Her emotions bordered on anxiety and forced her to spit our questions in rapid succession.

Its useless to think about. If we talk with that assumption, the human known as Karuizawa Kei would become a completely different person. If that were the case, our relationship wouldnt have developed to this point.

That I see. That may be the case but if that other person wasnt going out with you, would you expel them?

Even as she understood that it was meaningless, it seemed that she couldnt go without asking.

With the ability weve been assuming, probably.

Uu

I understand that you feel hurt, but thats not you. It really is someone else. You were hurt and bullied, then turned the tables in highschool by solidifying your position in the girls pecking order. You used Yousuke, met me and dated me. Thats Karuizawa Kei.

When I replied up to there, Kei pouted her lips in blatant dissatisfaction.

I wouldve protected you no matter who you were. That was the right answer, okay?

I see.

She wanted me to declare that I would protect Karuizawa Kei even if it wasnt herself.

I learned that logic isnt necessary here.

Then I let her lie down on my lap, patted her head and shifted into putting her in a good mood. After a few minutes of Kei enjoying herself, curled up on my lap like a cat, she opened her mouth in that position.

Hey Kiyotaka. I dont really mind how you cut off Sakura-san. Because theres no mistake in the things you do. But was Horikita-san really correct in leaving behind Kushida-san? Wont she always be in the way?

The perpetrator of the crack that has fissured our class, Kushida Kikyou. Kei feels that the demerit in not expelling her is big. Thats not rare at all. Its a natural reaction.

Everyone holds their doubts. Though they doubt, when the time comes they cant easily declare anything. And in the end they think that its fine as long as it helps them. People probably started cooling down around the 2-day break on the weekend after the test. If there are people who doubt if it was the right thing to do, there will be people who are glad that it wasnt them. And people who fear that they will be next.

Kushida has something Airi didnt have. Do you know what it is?

Eh? Studies and sports, right? Kushida-san was pretty amazing. Since she can do anything well.

On the surface thats what the reason is. But thats not whats important.

What do you mean?

She has the potential to be an important piece in Horikita Suzunes awakening as a leader. Not for Yousuke or for Kei, but for Horikita, she might become something of a partner.

Kushida-san will?

Horikita herself probably doesnt understand fully yet. Since we were stressed for time she just had to believe in her own intuition.

Thats something Kushida-san has that Sakura-san doesnt

The perspective only Kushida holds, the thoughts only Kushida has, and the things only Kushida can say. Those are things she can show regardless of her popularity. And thats what will push Horikita.

Even though she understood in some way, Kei herself probably wasnt completely calm.

I suppose that was an obvious reaction. This is an uncertain future.

The only thing to show that Horikitas choice was right is an armchair theory.

Id understand all too well if Haruka held a grudge because that was a person close to her. Results dont take one or two days to manifest. Well just have to watch over them kindly.

But doesnt Hasebe-san hold a grudge against you, Kiyotaka?

Yeah.

The difficulty of the unanimity test when the time limit was imminent.

No matter how much Horikita would propose for others to be expelled, it wouldve been nearly impossible to reach unanimity.

And the truth was that it wouldve been difficult to lose class points at that time.

So if I had not moved there wouldve been no salvation.

It would be easy if you could tell the results, conclusions or answers. But the fact is that you cant.

What about Horikita-san?

Whether she could or couldnt clear what lied before her, either choice presented an extreme hurdle. If she had challenged it but failed, it might not end with her just not being able to clear it. She might scratch her knee, or if shes unlucky, break a bone.

This is exactly what youd imagine as a hurdle on the road for which your ability was barely high enough.

What do you think is necessary in order to clear that hurdle safely?

Eh? Y-Yeah do a lot of practice before you do it?

What if you cant practice?

Then theres no choice but to do it off the cuff right? Theres no choice

Its the same thing. Horikita ran and tried to clear the hurdle before her eyes without stopping her feet.

In other words, if Horikita had failed then she would have fallen over?

No, shes just about to leap. The extent of her injuries, whether shell fall over, and whether shell sustain a serious injury herself. These things arent decided yet.

It wouldve been easy to avoid that hurdle. Instead of leaping she could have went around it.

This is where I wanted to see Horikita.

I wouldnt have imagined this right after we started our schooling. Once again, I think its curious myself.

I see. But really, I cant fully agree with Horikita-sans judgement. Because she broke her promise. Still, she even declared that she would protect Kushida-san.

Indeed, in one way it was a threat. Its also a fact that the order in Horikitas class has slackened too much now compared to before.

With the stir this created, they now know that their safety is not guaranteed. Of course, trust towards Horikita has wavered dramatically, but that can be undone with the special exams beyond this point. Though with the condition that we continue successfully approaching the A-Class.

While we were chatting, the time passed seven.

I fixed the plates we used to eat and went to the kitchen to clean them right away.

Hey-hey-. Lets talk here~

Ill wash the dishes now so lets do it after.

Eh-? But then 7:30 will arrive.

Once Yousuke comes our discussion would start. Her voice sounded unhappy.

I ignored her and started washing the dishes. Kei kept quiet for a while, but she seemed to have lost her patience as she started making demands again.

Now, now, no need to hold yourself back. Come here. Okay? Okay?

As she said that, she slapped her palms against the bed three, then four times.

It cant be helped-

I wanted to do the dishes before Yousuke came, but I gave up on that.

I lowered myself to the spot she patted. Kei happily poked my right cheek with her index finger.

Your skin is so smooth for a guy that its almost cheeky. Do you do anything with it?

Just skin lotion.

Considering the burden on teenage skin, I didnt think that any more products than that were necessary.

Hmmm

Though she understood, as if something like that didnt actually matter, she didnt stop poking my cheek.

I took her hand, pulled her in and stole a kiss.

I thought shed be surprised, but she smiled while blushing as if shed been waiting for it.

Ive been waiting for that since I came into your room tonight.

Really.

I was still naive in reading that sort of thing.

Then we joined lips again, closely and quietly.

The repeated kiss tasted like omurice. It was a slightly different experience.

I love you

I gently embraced Kei as she clung to me, and we were enwrapped in silence.

It wasnt an awkward thing, but a comfortable time we spent together.

I wonder how much time we spent simply embracing each other.

The doorbell rang, tearing up the stillness.

Kei was suddenly pulled back to reality. She suddenly felt embarrassed, panicked and took distance.

Even if she wasnt quiet, the door needed a key well, I understand how she feels.

After waiting for Kei to calm down for just a little while, we welcomed Yousuke.

He entered the room still in his uniform.

After club, I went to Keyaki Mall with my upperclassmen.

Yousuke noticed our attention on his uniform and said.

Welcome, please feel free to come in-

Seeing Kei act like this was her room, Yousuke smiled happily.

He looked after her more than anyone else since enrollment, and that was exactly why he was happy to see her and how bright she was now.

Im coming in.

He carefully arranged his shoes and sat down in the room. I took out some tea.

Thank you.

So what were you going to consult me about?

Since this may take a long time, I encouraged him to speak.

Though of course I can predict everything this will be about.

Yes. Its about our class. I think Karuizawa-san also knows this well, but I believe that rushing into the sports festival as we are now may be dangerous. In particular, it may be difficult for the girls to coordinate.

Since Kei would know more about that, Yousuke moved his gaze towards her.

I spoke with Kiyotaka about Shinohara a while ago. Honestly, were not at the level of deciding how well do the competitions.

Since were still trying to repair their relationships as friends.

I wondered if he had any good ideas. I want to borrow Kiyotaka-kuns help.

Kei asked for my help in the same manner she did a while ago as she turned her eyes to me.

If thats the case, I wont hesitate to speak.

Yousuke, have you tried consulting with anyone else before me?

Eh? No this is the first. Because I dont think it will go well if I suddenly talk to someone else and let them know that I want the girls to reconcile.

It would be better if he honestly wanted to borrow their strength, but if he lets them know that he wants to have them reconcile then they might be more cautious instead.

They could also suspect that theres something behind his kind words.

What about you?

As youd expect, I still want instructions.

Then after this, I want you to talk to the class leader, Horikita, not me.

But I think Horikita-san has her hands full with Kushida-san. To bring our problems to other classmates right now would be-

Then if I had dealt with Kushida, would you have called Horikita?

Thats I wonder. I mightve still spoken with you, Kiyotaka-kun.

Yousuke imagined that scenario and honestly admitted.

Horikita-san is doing well. But I think that Kiyotaka-kun looks at everything and makes accurate judgements.

Id do the same. I mean, if we leave it to Kiyotaka he can come up with a perfect answer.

I said it in the previous special exam too. You cant always rely on me. If something is wrong then come to Horikita first, you adopt this process.

But-

Well be a burden. She wont necessarily come up with a solution every time. So we wont count on her. We cant count on her. Then do you think that Horikita can truly become your leader? What if this was a leader like Ryuuen, Sakayanagi or Ichinose? Do you not think that problems can manifest while youre dealing with something?

The important thing is to trust and to be trustworthy. Horikita, and the class, after repeatedly failing and succeeding, are on the verge of growth.

Failure is an experience. Everybody has faced the problem of 1+1. Of course Horikita isnt at that stage yet, but she still has an overwhelming lack of experience.

Before you reach the solution, you must not neglect the process of searching for the solution in discussion with one another.

If she says that her hands are full with Kushida, then Id like you to come talk to me.

I see. I understand what Kiyotaka-kun wants to say.

Yousuke honestly accepted my words, nodded several times and processed what I meant inside himself.

Its important to experience failure, but this is different from how many points you get on a test. If we get a low score, I dont think it can be compensated for by doing our best next time. This is important. It affects the hearts of the students. If our cracked relationships completely shatter because of a naive decision they can never be recovered.

Something like this was expected from Yousuke. It didnt seem that he came just to get an easy answer.

Thats correct. But isnt that a bit naive? Its true that a crack has manifested in the friendships between our classmates, hasnt it? So disagreements, quarrels, and badmouthing between friends will certainly develop into problems that cannot be recovered from?

Hate from badmouthing, then ignoring. Escalation into bullying represents the worst case scenario.

But that really is the worst case scenario.

Kei. Is your antagonism with Shinohara that serious?

No now that you say it, its more like a prolonged quarrel. Though itll be hard for me if I say something wrong since Im the perpetrator. They dont really harass me or anything. And I dont think there are that many people who hate Shinohara-san.

They had been getting too nervous because it was becoming too serious. That was my opinion.

Besides, you dont intend to have only Horikita solve this, do you?

Of course not. If I can do anything Ill do it.

Good. If you two conduct yourselves well with Horikita at your center then youll probably be able to weather this through.

Though I cant completely remove their uncertainty with just these words.

There I added the important thing.

Of course, even if you cooperate with Horikita there will be times where you wont be able to solve it. When that time comes Ill lend my hand.

If they have complete back-up, then Yousuke and Kei will be able to move without hesitation. The two showed agreement, but Yousuke still seemed to have something on his mind. His heart still wasnt completely clear. From there we exchanged information for a while. I encouraged them to leave near eight o clock.

Um if its okay with you, could you let me speak with you just a little bit in private?

When they were about to leave, Yousuke broke the ice, thinking that he couldnt let it end like this.

Okay. Then Ill go first.

Kei replied to Yousuke who said that he still had something to discuss and left quickly.

After the door was closed, Yousuke turned back to me again.

Kiyotaka-kun. Ill approach Horikita-san tomorrow. But do you have a clear path in your mind at this point in time?

Honestly, I dont have any ideas that can instantly solve the problem with Kushida and Haruka. I hope that you guys will discuss it among yourselves and deal with it well.

Which means thats not the case with Mii-chan?

More or less. It will take time but theres a chance. If theres no time then there are drastic measures.

Drastic measures? If theres anything we can do then I think we should do it.

Yousuke showed his usual reaction even towards a girl who had feelings for him.

I said it was drastic. I dont recommend it.

What kind of method is it?

That is, you going to meet her and answering her feelings.

Yousuke reacted as if he hadnt even thought of it.

The truth is, youve also liked Mii-chan. Youve been wanting to go out with her. If you tell her something like that then she will go to school as early as tomorrow.

Its a bit hard to even say, but thats the solution I struck upon right now.

If it werent you, Yousuke, I wouldnt have said something this foolish. But since you had experience faking your relationship with Kei after she asked you, I thought it might be possible.

Thats true, Yousuke muttered, but his expression was unclear.

The reason Karuizawa-san and I agreed to fake going out with each other was because neither of us held romantic feelings. Its different from pretending to accept Mii-chans feelings. Because shell only be deeply hurt afterwards.

I dont intend to recommend this idea, but thats not true. Its unclear when she started to like you, but you cant neglect the other students who have had feelings for you since we entered this school. In other words, in exchange for you protecting Kei from bullying by going out with her, there may have been girls who were indirectly rejected and hurt because of that lie.

Thats-

If Kei and Yousuke had really been going out then it wouldve been a just reason.

But with that not being the case, though the situation is different, theres no big difference.

What if right now, Mii-chan came crying, clung onto you and said that if you dont go out with her then she wouldnt be able to go to school anymore? Will you be able to refuse her decisively since you cant pretend to do so?

Yousuke lost his words. He probably wouldnt be able to make that choice.

If you cant refuse, then youd have two options. Start dating after telling her that you dont love her, or lie that youve also loved her before dating her.

And if true love sprouts from there, it will have possibly been the best conclusion.

Still, I dont think I should do that.

Even as he understood my piece, his emotions still prevented him, huh.

Its a thoroughly forceful solution. It will take some time from now, but Im scattering seeds.

Got it youre really strong, Kiyotaka-kun. Youre not showing the slightest signs of being dragged down by how you expelled Sakura-san.

As Yousuke spoke quietly, I couldnt see any sadness or anger from him.

For me, my hands still feel the sensation from that time.

He looked down on his hands on either side of him and stared at the palms.

The sensation of touching my tablet, of pressing agree. I cant forget it.

Yousuke made every effort for his classmates. He couldnt show too much weakness.

But hes been thinking about the responsibility of Airis expulsion from the same perspective as me and agonizing over it.

I know what you were thinking at that time, Yousuke. Of course you wouldnt agree to expel Airi, who hadnt done anything wrong in that test. But still, you held it in. Even though we did something that you couldnt agree to in the very end, you held yourself back from saying that.

He was dealt an outrageous card. If he complained about that situation, looking them directly in the eye, our classmates would have regained their composure. If their field of view which had been narrowed by the pressure of the time limit was widened, it might have been impossible to reach unanimity.

Our class rising to A-class that is, the most important thing that was what I told myself.

Even if he understood mentally, he couldnt agree. That was probably what it was.

Hasebe-san, Kushida-san and Mii-chan are absent. I wonder how long this will go on. Our classmates have seen how students with bad results can get cut off, they are filled with trepidation. The bright class we had until last week has become dead silent as if it was a lie.

Though he moved towards the solution, he mustve been agonizing over the same thing over and over again, asking himself.

I understand well that you dont agree with my and Horikitas decision. But theres nothing to do but accept it. Theres nothing to do but understand how much power our class holds now and bite your lips. Thats exactly why Horikita needs a lot of support. If you can choose a certain path then you can also choose a wrong path. And you can even choose an uncertain path.

At the time I tell him, theres no way that Yousuke can digest all of it within himself.

I - wondered if we shouldve chosen to reach the time limit

Yousuke could no longer endure it. His shoulders shook slightly.

He didnt want to bear even the thought of sacrificing someone.

Even still, being able to reach the solution in that situation was certain growth.

Have I become strong, or have I broken. If a time like that comes again, I dont know how Id solve it and Im scared.

I couldnt see his face as he hung his head. Then he wiped his eyes with his sleeves and raised it.

Im sorry for saying weak-minded things even though you should be the one whos suffering the most.

Its fine. You saved Horikita and I many times in the special exams. Im expecting tougher battles to happen from now on. I want you to always lend your power for the sake of the class.

Yousuke nodded. His heart is probably still wounded, but he showed a small smile.

Yousuke was extending his hand to my front door when he stopped it.

I have a lot of things to thank you for today.

Do you resent me for having Airi expelled?

Unlike other students, Yousuke didnt show it on the surface, but it would be no wonder if that were the case.

If that were the only thing I saw. But I believe in you.

As he thought over his words, he added as if they didnt sit well with him.

No. I want to believe in you.

If it were mindless acceptance then Id think that Yousuke was having dangerous thoughts. But deep within his eyes he definitely had his own will. I believe you so dont betray us, it demanded resolutely.

Then good night.

I mustve been able to remove some of the laod on Yousukes back, but I might have also given him more weight to carry. If all of the pus was thoroughly removed tonight, it will have been convenient but how much results can I anticipate?

At any rate, I need to follow up, one step at a time.