"I guess," Christy reluctantly agreed.

Katie sat up and gave a tug on Christy's bedspread. "Stop your whining, girl! Can we have a reality check here? You have it great and don't know it."

Christy didn't try to explain her feelings to Katie. They were hers alone. Feelings of wanting to be romanced. When she had dated Rick, he had brought roses and said incredibly tender things. Todd never said mushy stuff or touched her hair and gazed in her eyes the way Rick had. But with Rick, it felt like a game, and she was the prize.

If Todd would only throw a little tender romance into their close, honest, consistent relationship, it would be perfect. He seemed to be holding back, and so of course, she held back too.

"h.e.l.lo?" Katie waved her hand in the air to get Christy's attention. "Anybody home?"

"I'm sorry. What were you saying?"

"Summer camp. I think we should go to summer camp."

A warm sensation washed over Christy. A feeling of sitting around a campfire at night, of picking wildflowers, and of splashing into a sun-toasted lake. A feeling of mysteriously meeting someone in the woods. Someone new. Someone handsome and tender who would write her long, romantic letters and hold her hand in the moonlight.

"Excuse me," Katie said. "Am I, like, having a onesided conversation here?"

"No, I'm listening. Summer camp. Were going to summer camp. We're going to have a fantastic time at summer camp. I'm ready. Let's go!"

Katie's mouth turned up into a smile. "I don't know about you, Christy. I think you're asleep with your eyes open. Perhaps I'd better leave you alone to finish your dream without interruption."

Katie rose to her feet. "July fifth to the eleventh. Call Luke this week at church and tell him you agreed to go. He'll be glad. I'll see you later. Sweet dreams!"

Letting herself out, Katie left Christy with a swirl of exciting summer camp thoughts. She would have to ask her parents, request time off from work, and make sure she had enough clothes for the entire week. Maybe this summer would hold some adventure after all.

The next Sunday, Christy talked to Luke, their youth pastor, and asked some questions about the camp.

"It's called Camp Wildwood, and it's about two hours from here," the big, bearded, lovable youth pastor answered. "You'll have eleven girls in your cabin. Your tuition is paid, but I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to come up with twenty dollars for the transportation."

"That's no problem. And I already have the week off from work, so I'm all set."

Luke gave her an appreciative smile, "You know, Christy, I really am glad you're willing to do this."

"Willing? Are you kidding? I can't wait! I love going to camp."

"I'm glad. I think it'll be a good week. I want you to know how much I appreciate you and Katie for signing up. Not many of the other students are willing to give up a week of their summer."

"Well, they don't know what they're missing," Christy said. She thought it was great that the church was sponsoring the teens who wanted to go by paying for their tuition.

That afternoon, Todd came over, and they went to the beach. Even though summer was supposed to have arrived, it was chilly, and a thin mist of ocean fog hovered above the sand.

"Carlsbad is such a different beach from Newport," Todd commented as they sat together on a blanket and looked out at the waves. "It's hard to believe it's only sixty miles down the same Pacific coast from Newport. It feels like I'm on the Atlantic."

"Why?" Christy slipped on her sweatshirt and wrapped the end of the blanket around her bare feet. "Because it's so cold today?"

"No, it's the way the waves break. They seem to come in at a different angle here. I don't know. Could be the weather too. Although it's not unusual for it to be like this in June."

At Christy's home in Escondido, about a half hour drive from Carlsbad, it had been warm and sunny when they had left. She had put on shorts and a T-shirt over her bathing suit. Her wise mother had tossed her a sweatshirt on her way out the door.

The wind whipped the sleeves of Todd's T-shirt. He seemed comfortable enough. Christy had never really noticed before, but the hair on Todd's legs looked white-blond and was super curly. He didn't even have goose b.u.mps.

"I'm cold," Christy said.

Todd took his gaze off the ocean and looked at her in surprise. "You are?"

Christy smiled at his amazed expression and rubbed the goose b.u.mps on her bare legs. "Yes, I am. I don't come with a built-in fur coat like you do to keep me warm." She playfully reached over and pulled one of the hairs on his leg.

"Ouch!" he said. Then noticing her smooth legs, he asked, "Why do girls do that, anyway? Shave their legs, I mean."

"So they'll look nice. You know, smooth and feminine."

"But then you get cold."

"Never mind," Christy said. "Actually, we do it so that guys will feel sorry for us when we say we're cold, and they'll put their arms around us and warm us up."

"I have a better idea." Todd stood up and offered Christy his hand. "Let's walk."

Todd's hand felt strong and secure as they strolled down the beach together. Her legs were still cold, but inside she felt warm and content. That's how things had been between her and Todd for the last few months. More than brother and sister, not quite boyfriend and girlfriend.

She felt Todd's thumb rubbing the chain on the gold ID bracelet she wore on her right wrist. He had given it to her a year and a half ago with the word "Forever" engraved on it. It was Todd's promise that they would be friends forever. As it was, their relationship had gone through many ups and downs since they first met two summers ago. But Todd's promise had remained. He always treated her like a close friend. It was just that sometimes, like now, Christy wanted more*

"What are you thinking about?" she asked him.

"About Papua New Guinea," Todd answered. "I was wondering what angle the waves come in there."

What did I expect? Ever since I first met Todd, he's been dreaming of being a missionary to an island full of unreached natives. He's such a surfer boy. I bet if I cut him, he would bleed salt.w.a.ter. Why did I think he would be thinking of me?

'"What were you thinking?" he asked.

The question surprised her. Although she asked him for his thoughts often, he rarely asked her. Maybe Todd was becoming a little more like Christy as they spent more time together. She knew she was becoming a little more like him.

"I was thinking about us and wondering what the future held." One thing Christy had learned was to be honest with Todd.

There was a pause. Then Todd squeezed her hand and said, "Me too."

Christy felt her heart beat a little faster.

Todd stopped walking and turned to face her. The filtered sunlight shone on his face, illuminating his clear silver-blue eyes and highlighting his square jaw. His expression remained sober, and no dimple appeared on his right cheek.

"But you know what, Kilikina?"

Christy always melted when he called her by her Hawaiian name.

"If we spend all of today thinking about tomorrow, today will be gone, and we will have missed it."

Christy knew he was right. As much as she wished he would wrap his arms around her, hold her tight, kiss her hair, and tell her that all his future plans included her, she knew he wouldn't. Todd was reserved when it came to physical expression. It was part of his honesty. He once told her that he would never purposefully "defraud" her.

When she asked what he meant, Todd said, "I won't deliberately arouse a desire in you that I can't follow through on honestly, before G.o.d."

She knew that if their relationship had been full of hugs and kisses and whispered secrets about their future, her desires for him would have been aroused past the point of no return.

As it was now, they could walk away from their relationship today, and besides missing each other's close friendship, they would have no regrets about making promises they weren't able to keep or painful memories from having become too intimate.

"Then let's enjoy today," Christy said, her eyes smiling at Todd. "I'm glad we can be together. We'd better keep walking though. I'm starting to get cold again."

Todd squeezed her hand and started down the beach. They spent the next two hours collecting sh.e.l.ls, digging for sand crabs, and playing foot tag with the waves. It really was a wonderful afternoon.

When they arrived at home, Mom had tacos waiting for them and a message that Katie had called.

Christy didn't call Katie back until the next morning. The conversation was short, and Katie's news sent Christy back to bed on her first Monday of summer vacation.

"Christy," Mom called, tapping on her bedroom door, "are you okay?"

"Come on in, Mom. I'm b.u.mmed. Katie can't go to camp. Her parents won't let her because it's a church activity. Isn't that crazy? They let her take off and do all kinds of stuff you guys would never let me do, but they won't let her become too involved in church. It has to be hard for her, being the only Christian in her family."

"Do you still want to go?" Mom asked.

"Sort of. Not as much as before."

"Maybe we can call Luke and see if some other girls that you know are going," Mom suggested.

"Okay," Christy sighed. "But it won't be as much fun without Katie."

Christy didn't get around to calling Luke. When she saw him Sunday at church, she asked him who else was going to camp.

"You and Katie were the only two girls-from the youth group."

Christy couldn't believe it. Their high school group had people in it.

"I'm sorry Katie isn't going. We really need counselors. That's why I appreciated you both signing up."

"Counselors?" Christy squeaked. "Katie signed us up to be counselors?"

"For junior camp," Luke explained. "We need counelors for the fifth-grade girls. You thought Katie signed you up for high school camp? That isn't until the last week of August. Does this mean you want to drop out too?"

Something about the way Luke worded it made Christy feel like she would be the flake of the year if she withdrew only a week before camp. Especially since Katie had backed out.

"No, I'll go." Christy tried to sound like it didn't make much difference to her. "I have the time off from work, and you need counselors. I'll go."

A huge grin spread over Luke's face. "Thanks, Christy. I knew I could count on you! It'll be a real stretching experience, you'll see."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Christy muttered.

The next Sunday, when she arrived in the church parking lot with her luggage and sleeping bag, she knew she wasn't up for this stretching experience. A sea of fourth -and fifth-grade kids ran through the mounds of luggage, yelling, hitting, tattling, and clearly presenting Christy with a glimpse into her next week.

It took more than an hour to organize the troops, load their luggage, and get everyone on the bus at one time. Christy sat in the seat right behind the driver, hoping to ignore most of the spit wads, smacking gum, and rude little boys. She realized her main goal this week would be to avoid getting gum in her hair.

Katie, I'm going to get you for this one!

The crazy part was that this was Katie's type of activity. She loved being the center of attention with a bunch of kids and had a way of getting them to follow her easily. Those were Katie's special gifts, not Christy's.

A young girl ran screaming from the back of the bus and dove into the empty seat next to Christy as if her life depended on being protected from whatever was chasing her. Christy readjusted her legs to accommodate the flying banshee and asked in her sternest voice, "What is going on here?"

"Eeeeeeek!" the girl squealed, ducking and covering her head with her arms.

A cute kid with bright eyes and dark blond hair skidded down the aisle and slugged the girl in the back.

"Stop that right now!" Christy demanded.

"She took my candy," the boy hollered.

"Is that true?" Christy asked the girl, who was still bent over at the waist. Her matted hair hung over her face. The girl only giggled.

Christy asked again, "Did you take his candy?"

The girl kept giggling as Christy grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her upright, revealing the stolen candy in her lap.

"Give it back," the boy spouted, grabbing the stash of candy bars and marching to his seat at the back of the bus.

As instantly as the seat beside Christy had filled, it now emptied. Giggling, the candy robber hopped up and returned to where her friends sat.

Christy felt a rush of relief when two college-age guys boarded the bus. With booming voices, they got the kids' attention and commanded them to settle down. To Christy's amazement, they did.

One of the guys announced the rules for the bus ride to camp. The other one asked them to bow their heads and close their eyes because he was going to pray for their trip to camp.

Christy added her own prayer at the end. Lord, could You a.s.sign me a couple of extra guardian angels this week? I think I'm going to need them.

when the bus rolled under a rustic wooden sign that read "Camp Wildwood," Christy felt an urge to jump bus and run for home. The word rustic would be a polite way to describe the camp. Christy's cabin was at the end of an uphill trail that made luggage-hauling miserable. Her fledglings followed her up the narrow, dusty trail, squealing and sobbing and making enough noise to scare off any wildlife for miles.

Somehow Christy knew the only wildlife she would experience this week would be in the form of pillow fights at three in the morning, frogs in her sleeping bag, and raids from the boys' cabins across the creek.

"Okay, girls," she called out as they stepped into their home sweet home. "I'm taking the bunk on the bottom here by the door. Everyone find a bunk. If you fight over who's on top, we'll swap positions halfway through the week."

The girls took to their nesting with lots of noise. Christy tried to let them solve their own problems while she smoothed out her sleeping bag. She found a note from her mom tucked inside.

May you have sweet dreams every night Love, Mom.

Christy smiled and tucked it in her backpack. She pulled out her notebook just as two of the girls were about to exit.

"Whoa! Where are you going?" Christy stopped them. Suddenly she understood why, at the camp counselors meeting last night, they had made such a big deal about the counselors taking the bottom bunk by the door. It was the best spot to serve as a door guard.

"Out," the blond one answered.

"Not yet," Christy told her. "We have to have a cabin meeting first."

The girls acted as if she had just ordered them to eat raw brussels sprouts and marched off to their bunks, pouting.

"Okay, everyone come sit on the floor. We're going to have a quick cabin meeting, and then you have free time until dinner."