_Tal._ "All good violin players do like me; they prelude, not play tunes."

_Ips._ "Then Heaven be thanked for our blind fiddlers. You like syllables of sound in unmeaning rotation, and you despise its words, its purposes, its narrative feats; carry out your principle, it will show you where you are. Buy a dirty palette for a picture, and dream the alphabet is a poem."

_Lady Bar., to herself._ "Is this my cousin Richard?"

_Hither._ "Mind, Ipsden, you are a man of property, and there are such things as commissions _de lunatico."_

_Lady Bar._ "His defense will be that his friends p.r.o.nounced him insane."

_Ips._ "No; I shall subpoena Talbot's fiddle, cross-examination will get nothing out of that but, do, re, mi, fa."

_Lady Bar._ "Yes, it will; fa, mi, re, do."

_Tal._ "Violin, if you please."

_Lady Bar._ "Ask Fiddle's pardon, directly."

_Sound of fiddles is heard in the distance._

_Tal._ "How lucky for you, there are fiddles and tunes, and the natives you are said to favor, why not join them?"

_Ips. (shaking his head solemnly)._ "I dread to encounter another prelude."

_Hither._ "Come, I know you would like it; it is a wedding-party--two sea monsters have been united. The sailors and fishermen are all blue cloth and wash-leather gloves."

_Miss V._ "He! he!"

_Tal._ "The fishwives unite the colors of the rainbow--"

_Lady Bar._ "(And we all know how hideous they are)--to vulgar, blooming cheeks, staring white teeth, and sky-blue eyes."

_Mrs. V._ "How satirical you are, especially you, Lady Barbara."

Here Lord Ipsden, after a word to Lady Barbara, the answer to which did not appear to be favorable, rose, gave a little yawn, looked steadily at his companions without seeing them, and departed without seeming aware that he was leaving anybody behind him.

_Hither._ "Let us go somewhere where we can quiz the natives without being too near them."

_Lady Bar._ "I am tired of this unbroken solitude, I must go and think to the sea," added she, in a mock soliloquy; and out she glided with the same unconscious air as his lordship had worn.

The others moved off slowly together.

"Mamma," said Miss Vere, "I can't understand half Barbara Sinclair says."

"It is not necessary, my love," replied mamma; "she is rather eccentric, and I fear she is spoiling Lord Ipsden."

"Poor Lord Ipsden," murmured the lovely Vere, "he used to be so nice, and do like everybody else. Mamma, I shall bring some work the next time."

"Do, my love."

PICNIC NO. 2.

In a house, two hundred yards from this scene, a merry dance, succeeding a merry song, had ended, and they were in the midst of an interesting story; Christie Johnstone was the narrator. She had found the tale in one of the viscount's books--it had made a great impression on her.

The rest were listening intently. In a room which had lately been all noise, not a sound was now to be heard but the narrator's voice.

"Aweel, la.s.ses, here are the three wee kists set, the lads are to chuse--the ane that chuses reicht is to get Porsha, an' the lave to get the bag, and dee baitchelars--Flucker Johnstone, you that's sae clever--are ye for gowd, or siller, or leed?"

_1st Fishwife._ "Gowd for me!"

_2d ditto._ "The white siller's my taste."

_Flucker._ "Na! there's aye some deevelish trick in thir la.s.sie's stories. I shall ha to, till the ither lads hae chused; the mair part will put themsels oot, ane will hit it off reicht maybe, then I shall gie him a hidin' an' carry off the la.s.s. You-hoo!"

_Jean Carnie._ "That's you, Flucker."

_Christie Johnstone._ "And div ye really think we are gawn to let you see a' the world chuse? Na, lad, ye are putten oot o' the room, like witnesses."

_Flucker._ "Then I'd toss a penny; for gien ye trust to luck, she whiles favors ye, but gien ye commence to reason and argefy--ye're done!"

_Christie._ "The suitors had na your wit, my manny, or maybe they had na a penny to toss, sae ane chused the gowd, ane the siller; but they got an awfu' affront. The gold kist had just a skull intil't, and the siller a deed cuddy's head!"

_Chorus of Females._ "He! he! he!"

_Ditto of Males._ "Haw! haw! haw! haw! Ho!"

_Christie._ "An' Porsha putt.i.t the pair of gowks to the door. Then came Ba.s.sanio, the lad fra Veeneece, that Porsha loed in secret. Veeneece, la.s.ses, is a wonderful city; the streets o' 't are water, and the carriages are boats--that's in Chambers'."

_Flucker._ "Wha are ye making a fool o'?"

_Christie._ "What's wrang?"

_Flucker._ "Yon's just as big a lee as ever I heerd."

The words were scarcely out of his mouth ere he had reason to regret them; a severe box on the ear was administered by his indignant sister.

n.o.body pitied him.

_Christie._ "I'll laern yet' affront me before a' the company."

_Jean Carnie._ "Suppose it's a lee, there's nae silver to pay for it, Flucker."

_Christie._ "Jean, I never telt a lee in a' my days."

_Jean._ "There's ane to begin wi' then. Go ahead, Custy."

_Christie._ "She bade the music play for him, for music brightens thoucht; ony way, he chose the leed kist. Open'st and wasn't there Porsha's pictur, and a posy, that said:

'If you be well pleased with this, And hold your fortune for your bliss; Turn you where your leddy iss, And greet her wi' a loving--'" _(Pause)._