Just peacefulness, and a sense that the rest of the world had moved away. There were only the two of them and the hypnotic firelight, the whisper of the night breeze in surrounding cottonwoods, and a sense of security that Laura wasn't at all certain she had experienced with anyone before.

"D-Did you do a lot of this kind of courting when you were young?" she finally asked.

"Enough that you can rest assured you ain't harnessed into the traces with a man who don't know his business under a blanket," was his husky reply.

At his response, Laura smiled slightly and blinked to dispel a searing sensation in her eyes. He knew his business under a blanket? An hour ago, she might have interpreted that as a threat, or at the very least as a startling revelation, but she was quickly coming to realize that what Deke Sheridan said, or how he said it, had little or no relation to the man himself.

Deke put Laura in mind of a gift she had once received as a very young child from her maternal grandmothera beautiful, jewel-encrusted locket in a tiny velvet-lined box that had been wrapped expressly to frustrate the receiver in layer after layer of lovely paper, each secured with glue and knotted bindings of silk ribbon. It had taken Laura nearly an hour to peel away all the covering to get to her gift.

She wasn't so foolish as to liken Deke to a delicate locket, of course, but in his own way, he was proving to be as surprising a discovery. The only analogical difference was that his wrapping was coarse, his bindings knotted twine. To know him, to truly know him, a person had to peel away his many layers to discover the man underneath. A wonderful man, Laura was coming to suspect. Someone she might trust.

As if he read her thoughts, he chuckled deep in his chest and bent his head around to fasten twinkling eyes on her face. "How much rope you plannin' to play out here?"

Laura fastened a puzzled gaze on his. "Pardon?"

He wiggled his fingers where they rested over her ribs. "How much lead rope?" he repeated. When he saw that she still didn't understand, he added, "After workin' for a spell with a horse, I play it out some slack in the lead rope to see if it'll take its head or behave itself. I got me a real uneasy feelin' you're doin' the same."

Laura gave a startled giggle. "You liken yourself to a horse?"

"I don't know why the hell not," he came back with a grin. "Horses is real fine critters. Well?"

"Well, what?"

"You playin' me out enough slack to hang myself?"

"Yep."

"Shit."

She giggled again, then closed her eyes when she felt him press his face against her hair. His hand, she noticed, remained firmly planted where he had first placed it.

"You ain't no fun at all, girl. Puttin' a man on his honor ain't playin' fair." He wiggled his thumb across the cloth of her blouse. "You sure you don't wanna get a choke hold?"

"And if I did?"

She felt him smile. "Then I could be ornery without feelin' bad."

"I'd prefer you feel bad."

He feathered a touch along the underside of her right breast. "You'd best grab hold."

Laura's breath caught at the tingling sensation. "No, thanks."

"I'm tellin' you, that there is one thumb you'd best not trust."

She raised her lashes slightly. "I shall see."

"It's a downright dangerous thumb. Leave it loose to wander around and there ain't no tellin' what might happen."

"I've no doubt it could be dangerous," she said in a voice gone tight with breathlessness. "But it's your thumb, and I have decided you have earned my trust."

"Don't do me no favors, darlin'. What fun can I have if you trust me?"

"I suppose that's up to you."

"Well, hell."

Laura could tell by his tone of voice that he was pleased and trying very hard to hide it under his usual gruffness. No wonder Chief snarled so much; he had learned it from his master.

Instead of taking advantage of her lack of resistance, Deke curled his shoulders around her and began to sway slightly, holding her body firmly to his. The heat of him lulled her, and the hardness of him forced her spine to give. She stared into the leaping flames, her senses alert to his every breath, the thud of his heart against her shoulder, the slight shifts of his fingertips on her ribs. He rubbed his jaw against her hair and sighed, the rise and fall of his chest undulating her body.

The mood that descended was so indescribably tender that Laura nearly wept. Deke chased her melancholy away by suddenly loosening his arm from around her to touch her right hand.

"Which direction?"

"Pardon?"

He laughed softly. "East, west, north or south? Name me your pointers."

"East," she quickly came back.

"Good girl. And your other arm?"

"West."

He pressed his hard thighs against her fanny.

"South."

Laura's pulse escalated slightly as she recalled the parts of her body that he had insisted would always point due north if she was facing the North Star. She wondered if he might use this as an opportunity to touch her there.

He surprised her by leaning around to plant a quick kiss on the tip of her nose, his eyes dancing with mischief. "Fooled you."

"North," she said with a relieved smile.

He looped his arm back around her, insisted she locate the North Star, which she did with speed and ease now that he had taught her how to find it.

"Denver's southeast from here," he said. "So which way would you strike out to go there?"

Laura pointed, and he grinned. "Hot damn, girl. Next thing I know, you'll be leadin' me around by the nose."

Laura didn't have such confidence. "Without knowing where towns lie, though, what good will it do me to know my directions?"

"Maps help," he replied. "And you gotta learn to pay attention. Like say, leavin' out of Denver, you get your bearin's and keep track of which way you're goin'. That way, it's easy to turn back, and it also makes it real easy to figure where you probably are on a map."

"I'll never get the hang of it."

"Yeah, you will, 'cause I'm gonna teach you, and you're a quick learner." He inclined his head toward the vast expanse of darkness beyond the village. "It can be like another Boston out there for you, honey. Street signs, general stores, meat markets. It only seems scary to you 'cause nobody's bothered to teach you."

"Why do you want to be the one who does?" she asked thinly.

He stiffened at the question. "Why in hell wouldn't I?"

Laura swallowed, stricken with a sudden realization that for every layer of wrapping she peeled away from Deke, he was peeling one from her. "It has been my experience that most men enjoy maintaining certain measures of control. If you teach me to be completely self-sufficient, I shall have no need of you."

"Ah." He seemed to consider that for a long moment. "I see what you're sayin'. Hell and naked angels, I wouldn't have no control at all if I taught you how to get along fine without me, would I?"

"Not much," she admitted.

He raised an eyebrow. "A smart man'd keep you dumb and helpless so he could knock the shit out of you once a day whether you needed it or not. Only way to keep a woman in line, right? Teach her too much, and she might start thinkin' for herself. Or even run off if he treated her ornery."

Laura fixed her gaze on the fire, feeling a little sick. He was echoing the sentiments of the other two men who had played major roles in her life, first her father and then Tristan.

Deke straightened and rested his chin atop her head again. She felt the thrust of his jaw and the vibration of his larynx against her scalp when he finally spoke. "I thank you kindly for pointin' all them things out to me. Only a damned fool'd go teachin' you how to run off from him and cover your tracks while you was goin'."

Her mouth felt suddenly cottony. At least a full minute of silence ticked by after he finished speaking, each second measured by the loud beating of her heart. Deke finally broke the quiet by asking, "If a damned fool like that was to ask you to marry him, what'd be your answer?"

Laura craned her neck to look at him. "I beg your pardon?"

His smile was slow and mischievous. "I think you heard me real clear."

Laura stared up at him for what seemed an endless moment. "You mean you'll teach me all of that?"

"That and more. How to defend yourself against a man twice your size. How to take care of yourself and the baby a thousand miles from nowhere."

She could scarcely believe her ears. "Even though you know I might use the knowledge later to..."

"To run off from me?" he filled in.

Laura could see denying it was useless. "Yes."

His lashes made a lazy sweep over his eyes. "Laura, darlin', if a man works his heart out gentlin' a filly like I aim to you, and he still can't turn her loose without knowin' for sure she'll come back when he whistles, she ain't worth keepin'."

Her heart caught at the emotion she saw lurking behind the teasing twinkle in his eyes. "You'd be taking a risk. This may be one filly who values her freedom more than anything else."

"I ain't seen a filly yet that'd head for the hills when she felt free where she was at," was his husky reply. "And I learned a long time ago that packin' plenty of sugar in my pockets works a lot slicker than bein' ornery. A Cheyenne man don't believe in rough breakin'. He's taught from the time he's knee-high that loyalty's gotta be earned. I wanna earn yours."

That he could feel he hadn't already earned her loyalty told Laura more than he could know. She realized she was looking at him through a blur of tears. Was he real, this man? Or was she dreaming him? Deke Sheridan ... a little uncivilized. What a miscalculation that was. She no longer needed to ask him how old he had been fourteen years ago when he left his people. She knew. Her heart broke a little for the boy he had once been and for the man he had becomeboth rebels and set apart, both alone and drifting between two worlds, belonging in neither. But what she found most heartbreaking of all was her own blindness. How could she have taken this man's measure by standards that were so completely unfair? How could she have compared him to individuals like Tristan and her father and found him lacking? They weren't fit to breathe the same air he did.

"Hey." He bent his head to catch a trickling tear on her cheek with his jaw. "Don't cry, honey. I didn't mean"

"Oh, Deke."

Laura wasn't exactly sure how it happened, but somehow she turned within the circle of his arm, and in the next second, she was sobbing and hugging his shoulders.

"Christ," he said under his breath. "Honey, I didn't mean to upset you."

"Oh, God." A jagged rush of air caught in Laura's throat and made a tearing sound. "I'm not upset, I'm..."

He didn't understand. He couldn't understand. And she would never be able to explain. How could one stuff the hurts of a lifetime into a few sentences? To even try might make him think she wanted his pity, and she didn't. All she wantedoh, God, it was madness, but all she wanted was for him to hold her.

As if he sensed that, he somehow managed to gather her close with the arm that held the blanket, then began to thump her on the back with his other hand. It was those thumps, which she knew he meant to be comforting pats, that were her complete undoing. A hand that could concuss a full-grown hull. How many times might he have used it against her?

"Aw, honey, don't," he said in a tight voice.

Laura's lungs shuddered at each impact of his hand between her shoulders. In between pats, he rubbed and kneaded her tense muscles. What a wonderful hand it was. A big, callused, clumsy paw of a handbut she wouldn't have traded it for a thousand more fine-boned and elegant.

"Well, shit." He gave her a few more thumps. "Would it help if I said I'm sorry?"

"F-For what?" she squeaked in between abating sobs.

"I don't know. For whatever in hell it was I said to make you cry."

Laura started to laughshrill, wet giggles that she knew bordered on hysteria.

"Jesus Christ."

She laughed harder. A wonderful, cleansing laughter. In between gulps of breath, she managed, "It isn't you. It's me, don't you see? I'mI'm going crazy."

"Mind if I go along?"

The question sobered Laura because she knew it was seriously meant. For just an instant, she felt as though she were standing on the edge of a precipice and about to fall. To trust again. To allow herself to need again. For two long years, all she had dreamed about was attaining her freedom, and now Deke was asking her to give it up, to believe in dreams, to make herself vulnerable. To do any of those things would be madness, absolute madness. Hadn't her marriage to Tristan taught her anything? Namely that she could count on no one but herself.

"Oh, Deke, I'm frightened."

She expected him to ask, "Of what?" but instead, he whispered, "I know you are."

The wonder of it was, Laura believed he truly did.

She curled her fingertips into the thick pads of vibrant flesh and muscle over his shoulders, felt the heat of him through his chambray shirt. Strength and solidness, and he was offering them to her as he might a shield.

"What if" She caught her lip between her teeth. "How can you be sureI meanwell, what if I don't learn fast? What if you find yourself wishing you'd never gotten yourself saddled with someone like me? Aside from the color of my hair, I'm not a very"

"Don't," he cut in harshly. "Don't even finish the thought. That's Tristan talkin', and you gotta get all the things he ever told you straight outa your head. What matters now is what I say, and I say you're beautiful and sweet and smart as a whip. You'll make some lucky man a damned fine wife, and I'm first in line askin'." He ran his hand along the curve of her spine.

"I know you're scared, Laura. I ain't askin' you not to be. All I'm askin' is for you to give me a chance. I think I can make you happy, if you'll only let me try."

He made it sound so simple. She wondered fleetingly how he could possibly know what sort of things Tristan had said to her, but for the moment, the answer to that question seemed rather unimportant when he was demanding an answer to another, far more important one. Laura had no idea why he was even offering her a choice. The situation they were in dictated, didn't it? He had already explained at great length why neither of them had any alternatives. Why press her to acquiesce?

Even as Laura asked herself that, she knew why, and the answer was one of the reasons she was tempted to give him the yes he sought. All practical reasons aside, Deke wanted her to step into his arms only of her own free will. He was as uncomfortable with possessing her against her wishes as she was with being possessed. What appeared to be a sham of a marriage proposal was far, far more. He was trying in the only way he knew to make things right between them, to give her a sense of commitment rather than submission.

It was a sneaky maneuver. It was also very sweet of him to bother. He held all the trumps in this game. It wasn't necessary for him to let her play out her hand. All he need do was lay his cards on the table and scoop up his winnings.

In a quavery voice, Laura came as close to a yes as she possibly could by saying, "I'd like to be happy. It seems like a very long time since I truly was."

He hooked his hand over her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Can I take that for a yes?"

Still battling tears, she smiled against his shirt. A yes that actually meant nothing, yet meant the world. Even if it was pretense, she was grateful. It seemed she would be left with her dignity even if he took all else. "Yes," she whispered.