CHANTECLER Do I take what?
FIRST CHICKEN Pray talk without reserve. We represent the Board of Investigation into the Gallodoodle Movement.
CHANTECLER That's all very well, but I--[_Attempting to pa.s.s._]
FIRST CHICKEN You will find it difficult, I think, to leave, until you have answered such questions as we are pleased to ask. Is your early meal a light one?
CHANTECLER But--
SECOND CHICKEN You have tendencies, no doubt--
CHANTECLER Hosts.
SECOND CHICKEN What do you feel most particularly drawn to?
CHANTECLER Hens.
FIRST CHICKEN [_Without smiling._] Have you nothing to communicate with regard to your song?
CHANTECLER I just sing.
SECOND CHICKEN And when you sing--?
CHANTECLER The heavens hear me.
THIRD CHICKEN Have you a special method?
CHANTECLER I--
FIRST CHICKEN You live--
CHANTECLER To sing!
SECOND CHICKEN And your song--?
CHANTECLER Is my life!
THIRD CHICKEN But how do you sing?
CHANTECLER I take pains.
FIRST CHICKEN But do you scan [_Beating furiously with his wing._] one-one-two One-three? Three-one? Or four? What is your dynamic theory?
THE BLACKBIRD [_Shouting._] Who has not his little pet dynamic theory?
CHANTECLER Dyna--?
SECOND CHICKEN Where do you place the accent? On the c.o.c.k--?
THIRD CHICKEN On the Doo?
CHANTECLER On the--
FIRST CHICKEN [_Impatiently._] What is your school?
CHANTECLER Schools of c.o.c.ks?
SECOND CHICKEN [_Rapidly._] Certainly. Some sing c.o.c.k-a-doodle-doo, and some Keek-a-deedle-dee!
CHANTECLER c.o.c.k--? Keek--?
THIRD CHICKEN Not to speak of those who--
A c.o.c.k [_Coming forward._] The correct and proper way to crow is Cowkerdowdledow!
CHANTECLER What c.o.c.k is that?
FIRST CHICKEN An Anglo-Indian.
SECOND CHICKEN And the Turk over there, whose comb suggests a cyst, crows Coocooroocoocoo!
THIRD CHICKEN [_Shouting in his ear._] Do you not upon occasions vary your c.o.c.kadoodledoo with Cackadaddledaa?
ANOTHER c.o.c.k [_Springing up at the right._] I, for one, entirely suppress the vowels: C-ck-d-dl-d!
CHANTECLER [_Trying to get away._] Is it a Welsh Rabbit dream?
ANOTHER c.o.c.k [_Springing up at the left._] O-a-oo-e-oo! Have you ever tried suppressing the consonants?
ANOTHER c.o.c.k [_Pushing aside all the others._] I mix the whole thing up--Cuck-o-deedle-daa!--in a free and supple song!
CHANTECLER My brain reels!
ALL THE c.o.c.kS [_Gathered about him, fighting._] No! Cuckodee--No, Cackadaa--No, Coocooroo--
THE c.o.c.k [_Who mixes all up._] The free c.o.c.kadoodle! The free crow is obligatory!
CHANTECLER Pray, who is that, speaking with such authority?
FIRST CHICKEN It is a wonderful c.o.c.k who has never sung at all.
CHANTECLER [_In humble despair._] And I am only a c.o.c.k who sings!
EVERYBODY [_Drawing away from him in disgust._] I wouldn't mention it if I were you!
CHANTECLER I give my song as the rose-tree gives its Rose!
THE PEAc.o.c.k [_Sarcastically._] Ah, I was waiting for the Rose! [_Pitying laughter._]