"I caught him checking himself out in the mirror. I think he'd been jerking it, but I wasn't sure. He was all sweaty and his pants were undone."

"Gross."

Her nose wrinkled up. "Tell me about it. By then Mallory was starting to come around again. She thought he was stupid too, but it's not the same. She doesn't..." Her voice trailed off and a glimmer of sadness appeared before she looked away. Mallory wasn't me. She didn't laugh at Ben like we did.

"So," my voice hitched on a note. "Mallory was doing better before..." I couldn't bring myself to say it, that Mallory and Ben were gone. Oh G.o.d. I swallowed a knot in my throat. What did that mean? They had left. No one had taken them? My chest tightened. Had Franco found Mallory? But Carter hadn't said anything, he would've told me, wouldn't he? But then I knew-he wouldn't. And he'd been gone all week.

Just like that, my stomach dropped, and I knew something horrible had happened.

"Emma?" Amanda was frowning at me. She was pale now. "You don't look so good."

"I have to go." I turned on my heel and walked out of there. I would've run if it hadn't looked suspicious, but as I went, my heart dropped again. Everything had changed. Jeremy Dunvan changed everything. Carter was right. This had been done to me. I lost my friends because of what he did to Mallory.

My jaw hardened.

I was done with waiting and hiding. I had taken care of Mallory before Carter came into my life. I wasn't helpless and he needed to start telling me what was going on. This was my life too.

As soon as I cleared the cafe's entrance, I was whisked into a car waiting for me. Mike pushed me inside and climbed behind me. Another door shut in the front so I figured the guard by the bathroom sat by the driver. I glared at Mike and rubbed my arm, where he had gripped me harder than he ever had before. "Ouch."

He growled, then blanched and sat up straight. "Is your arm okay?"

"It's fine." I eyed him. I'd never seen Mike as anything other than professional, but he quickly switched, oozing it again. "You're mad at me?"

He stiffened.

I corrected, "You're all mad at me, aren't you?"

He didn't respond.

That was my answer. I sighed and scooted down. "I just missed her. I'm sorry." And I wouldn't do it again. I knew that much. They were only doing their job, and I had gotten mad. I was still mad, but I was going to take it out on Carter. And when I said take it out on him, I let out a deep sigh and knew I wouldn't say a word. He was protecting me. I shouldn't forget that and I had, for a little bit that afternoon.

"When you deviate into an unmarked room without us, you're going in blind. We were not prepared for the back room of that cafe."

Oh. Huh? "When you say unmarked, you mean...?"

"We've been over every room in your work building. We've even planned for the cafe, but you went into a dark room. We didn't have a guy in the back ready because we didn't think you would follow her. We thought you would stay in the front room."

"So a dark room is somewhere that you guys haven't mapped out yet?"

"Planned for."

"What's the difference?"

He grimaced. "We will be better next time. I promise."

I blinked at him for a moment. Why was he apologizing to me?

He saw my look. "If something had happened, if someone had grabbed you, it would've been our fault. We weren't ready. We have to always be ready."

"Oh." And the Shame of the Month Award went to me. I was flooded with guilt. "I won't go into rooms like that again. Would that help?" There was so much about what they did that I didn't know about. "Maybe you guys could help me learn about how you operate. I don't really know that much, except that Carter told me to call 09 for when I'm ready to go home. I never call it, but you guys always seem to know. He said you guys have been watching me for a long time."

He shrugged. "We have a blending technique, but you don't need to really understand that. We'll do better next time."

"Okay." I wanted to know. I wanted to help, but I sensed that Mike wanted the conversation to be done. I let it go.

It was later that I wondered about all the security guards again. I had showered, changed clothes, and my stomach was rumbling. When I heated up food, I saw one of the guards turn suddenly away from me. His hand grabbed at his stomach and I knew it hadn't been mine that was rumbling. I wondered when the last time these guys ate, but no-they must've had breaks at times. Still, I looked at the huge ca.s.serole in front of me. There was too much for me so I dished it onto three plates and handed one to the guy. A fork was next. He was startled, but shook his head. "No, ma'am. That's alright."

His stomach sounded again. I rolled my eyes and pushed it into his hands. "I'm not going to die in the two minutes it'll take you to eat that. Go ahead." I lifted the other plate. "Where's the other guy?"

He hesitated, but gestured with the fork to my floor. "He's outside by the elevator."

"Eat." I pointed to his plate as I started towards the stairs.

The other guard had a similar reaction except he dropped his radio. It hit the floor with a loud screech and he grabbed it, muttering apologies at the same time. I left the plate on the bench beside him and waved. "Have fun. Eat up." I scanned the small hallway. No Mike. "Where are the others?"

His head jerked up. "Ma'am?"

I sighed. Why did they all have to call me ma'am? "Mike and the rest of the guards. Where is he and how many are there? I'll cook something for everyone. They can eat it when you guys take your breaks."

I could tell he hadn't expected that. He almost dropped his plate. "Mike got called away for a transport and there are eight others."

Eight? Really? "Okay. I'll make more."

I didn't ask what a transport was. I was starting to figure out what they would tell me and what they wouldn't. Whatever a transport was made the list of Things Not To Discuss With Emma. But when I went back to the kitchen, I was surprised at how many guards Carter had enlisted. That meant there were ten security guards around me at all times. Ten...my stomach dropped and I sat down with a plop on the counter stool. I swallowed a lump in my throat. Ten guards. I had known there were a few, but ten-it was serious. My situation was serious. Carter wasn't one to waste anyone's time. Then I remembered what Amanda had said about Ben and Mallory.

My hands started to tremble.

I pushed that thought away before, but now I couldn't shake it. Something happened. I knew it. I could feel it. That same something could happen to me. Ten guards. All ten of them were trained and ready to take a bullet for me.

My stool started to wobble and I grabbed onto the counter. I couldn't hold on. My hands were shaking too much.

"Ma'am?"

I heard the guard's voice in the distance. Things were going black. He sounded far away. I thought he had been in the next room? Maybe he moved, and then the darkness covered all of me. Something crashed far away, and I heard his radio buzz.

"She's down...call the boss..."

"Emma."

A hand touched my arm briefly. I jerked awake and was disoriented. A large black silhouette stood above me and I started screaming.

"Stop!" He bent further down. "It's me, Mike."

I gasped on my last scream when he turned on the light, but my chest was still heaving from the panic. My heart was pounding. I rolled over to dry heave until I started to calm down. I felt something cold against my arm.

"It's Carter. He wants to talk to you."

"What?"

The cold thing pressed against me again. "It's Carter. He's on the phone."

Phone. Carter. My hand streaked out and I grabbed the small cellphone. When I rolled over, I pressed it to my ear and asked, "Carter?"

"Hey."

Everything in me sagged in relief. His voice soothed me. In the distance, I was barely aware of a door clicking shut. I murmured back, "Hey."

He chuckled. His smooth baritone came over the phone and sidled over me, like another caress from him. I closed my eyes and snuggled deeper into bed. I didn't care how I got there, what had happened, all I needed was Carter. That was all I knew.

"They said you fainted. Are you okay?"

I grimaced as I remembered. "Yeah. I did."

"Why?"

"Because you weren't here. Because I think something happened to Mallory and Ben. Amanda told me they're gone and I think you know something happened to them. Because I'm tired of feeling trapped. Because I got booted off a great project at work and I don't know why. Because I miss Amanda. I miss all of them, even Ben." I felt stupid saying all of that and I felt even more stupid because it was coming out of me in a rush. I needed him. My hand shook as it held the phone to my ear. "Because I miss you and because I'm scared."

There was silence on the other end.

Another beat pa.s.sed.

"I'm coming back."

Everything in me exploded, but I tried to argue with him. "No, I didn't mean for you to do that-"

"I'm coming home anyway." He sounded tired. "I have some business in New York, but I'll head to the jet right after." He paused. "I miss you too."

Warmth burst inside of me, but I tried to tone it down. I was becoming one of those gushy types. I hated those types, but I whispered back, "I'm glad you're coming back."

"You have to promise me something first."

"What?"

"Stop taking your anger out on the guys and making sudden changes."

Guilt sunk low in my gut.

"You can go wherever you want, just tell the guys first. They're good at their jobs, but sometimes they can't adapt fast enough. Please, Emma."

"I will."

"Good. How was your week?"

"It sucked."

He chuckled again. "I'm guessing it's not just because of last week?"

"What?"

"Friday night, Emma."

"Oh!" My eyes widened. I'd forgotten about the attack. How could I have forgotten? "That slipped my mind. I can't believe that..."

"Look," his voice dropped to an intimate tone. "I can't talk about a lot of things over the phone, but I'm making things happen. I'm making sure you're safe and someday you might not need all those guys around you. I'm trying, Emma. I'm doing my d.a.m.nedest right now to fix it so you're going to be okay."

"But my roommate," I whispered back.

He sighed into the phone. "I can't make any promises about her. I'm trying, but you're my first priority, Emma. I promise you, this will all be over soon."

I clenched the phone tighter. "You promise?"

"I do. I can promise that."

I nodded and felt a tear fall onto the pillow. "Okay."

"Are you okay?" Concern filtered into his voice now. "Are you eating?"

"I got scared." The admission slipped me before I knew what I was going to say.

"I'm sorry, Emma. I should've been there."

"No, you said that you have things to do. You have to work. You-" are doing something to make sure that I'm safe. Even as I thought that, shame tore through me. He was right. I was angry that he left and that he stayed away for so long. I was angry that he hadn't called or texted. I was angry that he wasn't beside me, but Carter wasn't normal. This wasn't a normal relationship-and then I bolted upright in bed.

Carter and I were in a relationship.

The last time I'd been in a relationship-I squeezed my eyes shut. The guy had cheated on me, robbed me, and turned all of my friends against me. It was another reason why I was only friends with Mallory and Amanda. The few friends I had in college were snooty and disloyal. Mallory and Amanda seemed safe when I met each of them.

AJ and Carter had been my first family. The few friends I had in college could never be considered as family, but that changed once I met Mallory after I graduated. She became my family, and then Amanda was included. Ben got added because he never left Mallory's side for years. But now those three were gone and Carter had come back.

As I sat there, struggling to breathe, tears flowed down my face. Everyone left.

"Emma?"

I became aware of his voice. The phone had fallen into the covers and I grabbed it. "Sorry."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Emma."

"I am," I rushed out. "When are you coming back?"

"I'll be back tomorrow night."

"Good." I took a deep breath. "That's good."

"Are you sure you're okay?"