I'm sick of sitting at a table with my sisters, eating doughnuts, and playing Go Fish. I'm going to go lie down in the bedroom, which is just a raised platform with a thin mattress on top and a curtain around it. I'm going to try to go to sleep and maybe when I wake up, I'll find out this whole thing was just a nightmare.

10:48 A.M.

I'm awake. I slept one for one lousy hour. But now, on top of being bored and miserable, I'm also nauseous. I asked Dad if we could stop so I could throw up, but he said we have a toilet on board that will work just fine.

10:54 A.M.

I forgot to mention that I'm also hot. Dad said there must be a problem with the air conditioning. For once, I agree with my father.

1:46 P.M.

We're now at the campground where we're parking the Clunker and sleeping for the next three nights while we're in St. Augustine, Florida. Dad said, "We've arrived at Florida's finest." June seemed to like those words because she's been repeating them nonstop ever since he said them. She said it sounds like a tongue twister and she wanted to see how many times she could say, "We've arrived at Florida's finest." May said they should make it a challenge to see who could say it more times, so they've been continuously repeating what Dad said ever since we got here. Mom just looked at me and said I should join in the fun.

I told Mom I'd be happy to do that if there was anything here that looked like fun.

She replied that I need to work on my att.i.tude.

4:25 P.M.

A c.r.a.ppy situation

I wish there was a ladylike way to say what I'm about to say, but there's not. So here goes: Dad spent the afternoon getting rid of the pee and p.o.o.p in our RV.

It sounds just as gross as it is. First Dad had to find the "disposal site" where he could put our "waste products." I told May and June that was just a fancy name for a hole in the ground where you put your c.r.a.p. June kept asking Dad if he'd found the hole in the ground for the c.r.a.p. Dad got mad at me for teaching June the word c.r.a.p. He also got sweaty because it took him a long time to find the hole and it was really hot outside.

I tried to suggest to Dad that he should come inside the RV and cool down. But then I reminded him that our air conditioner wasn't working so that wasn't really an option. Dad didn't seem to appreciate that reminder. He said he could only deal with one RV issue at a time.

Anyway, once Dad found the hole, he put on these thick rubber gloves. They made him look like an unlicensed dentist or a child molester, and I told him so, but he said he didn't want to hear another word from me. Then he started mumbling some weird stuff about needing to find the sewer hose compartment. I thought I was hearing things.

Who goes on vacation looking for a sewer hose compartment?

Once Dad found the compartment, he took a hose out of our camper and stuck it in the hole in the ground. Then he opened up some sort of flap and all the pee and p.o.o.p from our camper started going through the hose and into the hole. Dad stood there holding the hose in his gloved hands saying how he had to do this until it fully drained.

That's an image I didn't need. No one wants to see their dad with his hands around a sewage hose waiting for it to drain.

And it gets worse. When Dad was done, he washed off his gloves and said he was saving them for next time. I'm horribly grossed out. I'm also completely unclear as to why my parents thought this trip would bring me closer to my family.

I've never wanted to get farther away!

Sunday morning, June 30, 8:45 A.M.

Going to Florida is every kid's dream, but to be honest, I don't get the attraction. For the past two days, all we've done is look at old stuff in St. Augustine, which Mom says is the oldest city in America. We saw an old school. An old house. An old fort. An old museum. An old jail. An old cemetery. They even have people here who dress up in old clothes to make you feel like you're taking a trip back in time.

May and June were taking a bunch of pictures, and they actually thought it was fun seeing everything. But I didn't. Which part of teenagers-are-into-new-stuff don't my parents understand? It seems like Mom and Dad made me come on this trip so our family could "re-bond," yet they've planned nothing in the way of activities that I feel has been helpful to this process.

I don't get it. They're so weird (my parents), and they made such weird children (my sisters), and they make such weird choices (purposely taking a vacation to the oldest city in America).

I sincerely hope this trip improves, and SOON!

8:30 P.M.

Just finished another day of sightseeing

I'd like to write that today was fun, but it wasn't. We went to an alligator farm, a pirate museum, and to see the Fountain of Youth. When the guy who works at the fountain asked if I'd like to taste the water, I said what I'd really like was a Diet Snapple. Mom and Dad failed to see the humor. I thought it was funny, and for just a minute it made me stop thinking about Brynn and Billy and what they're doing at camp without me, which is what I'd been thinking about pretty much the whole day.

We leave tomorrow for Disney World, which I hope will be more fun than where we've been. (It won't be hard to beat.)

It alwayS looks darkest before it getS totally black.

a"Charlie Brown Monday, July 1

In the parking lot of Disney World

The good news: We made it to Disney World.

The bad news: The bottom fell out the minute we arrived. The bottom of the Clunker literally fell out and bits and pieces of it are all over the Disney World parking lot. When it was happening, I thought there was an earthquake. I'm not sure if they have earthquakes in Florida (and I definitely didn't think they have them at Disney World), but what they do have here is a lot of sunshine and heat. We've been standing in it for over two hours waiting for the mechanic to get here. While throngs of other people are going into amus.e.m.e.nt parks filled with countless fun things to do, we're stuck in a parking lot.

Monday, July 1, 10:30 P.M.

At the Contemporary Hotel

Official worst day of my life

I've said it before, but this time I mean it. Today was truly the worst day of my life. I didn't think things could get any worse on this trip, but they did. They got much worse.

Here's what happened.

While we were waiting in the parking lot for the mechanic to arrive, Dad finally decided that it was stupid for all of us to be standing there, so Mom took May and June and me into the Magic Kingdom while Dad stayed back to deal with the Clunker.

Inside the Magic Kingdom, we went on a bunch of rides, and Mom bought May and June matching hats with Mickey Mouse ears on them. They were excited about their hats, but all I could think about was how everything we were doing was too babyish for me. It seemed like once again, Mom was just thinking about May and June and not what I would like.

By dinnertime, Dad was still dealing with the Clunker, so Mom took us to get something to eat. We'd just finished dinner and were walking around Main Street when Mom's cell phone rang. It was Dad calling to tell her what was going on with the Clunker, so Mom asked me if I would take May and June into the gift shop and watch them while she was on the phone with Dad. What was going through my head was that I didn't know why we had to come all the way to Florida for me to babysit my sisters, when that's what I've been doing all summer at home. After everything that happened today, it makes me sick that that's what I was thinking.

Anyway, I took May and June into the gift shop, and I started looking for presents for Brynn and Billy. I didn't know if Billy was going to want a present from me, but I figured I'd better get him one just in case. And I definitely needed to get something for Brynn. I started looking in the jewelry aisle, and I told May and June to stay there with me. There was a lot to look at, and I guess I got kind of caught up in looking for the right gifts, because the next time I looked up, there was no sign of May or June anywhere.

I told myself to stay calm. They had to be somewhere nearby. I started looking all over the gift store. I was calling out their names, but no one answered. I felt a knot forming in my stomach. They were nowhere in the gift shop.

I knew I needed to stay calm, but I was starting to feel way too hot. Everything around me seemed to be getting blurry. I had to find my sisters. Even though Mom was the last person I wanted to find out that I'd lost May and June, I knew I had to find her.

I went out of the gift store and saw Mom sitting on a bench. She was still on her phone. I could feel beads of sweat running down my face as I walked towards her. When I told her I couldn't find May and June, the look on her face was the worst I've ever seen.

"April, you were supposed to be watching your sisters!" Mom looked like she was going to be sick. I felt sick too. One minute my sisters were right beside me, and the next minute they were gone, and it was my fault.

Mom grabbed my arm, and we started running up and down Main Street looking for May and June. We were calling their names, but there was no sign of them anywhere.

It was terrible. Main Street was jam-packed with people. We could hardly see around the crowds. A few times I thought I saw May and June in their Mickey Mouse ears, but it was other little kids in the same hats. Other kids, other sisters, who were safe with their families and having fun.

As we pushed past people, yelling for my sisters, everyone was looking at us like they felt sorry for us, like no one would want to lose a kid among all these thousands of people. I didn't think it was possible, but their looks made me feel even worse.

A security officer heard us yelling and came over to help. He asked us all kinds of questions. Names. Clothing. Interests. He wanted to know everything about May and June. Mom was showing him pictures on her cell phone of what they look like.

It was starting to get dark.

The security officer called a bunch of other security officers and they all spread out, calling May and June's names. I started crying. Everyone was yelling and looking.

My sisters were lost and it was because I wasn't watching them when I should have been. I was trying to stay focused on the search, but my brain was thinking so many horrible thoughts. What if something terrible happened to my sisters? What if someone bad took them? What if they wandered into the inner workings of one of the rides and got hurt? What if we never found them? What if I ended up as an only child?

I kept looking at Mom, who was a weird shade of white and more serious than I'd ever seen her. I couldn't bear to think about how my parents would feel if something happened to May and June.

Mom and I kept looking in all the restaurants and shops on Main Street. There was so much Disney paraphernalia everywhere, but the only thing I wanted to see were my sisters' little faces.

It felt like we had been looking for so long, and my brain was completely filled with the fear that they were lost for good.

Mom and I had just looked for the third time inside an old-fashioned ice-cream shop when I heard someone screaming my name from the street. I ran outside, and there was June sitting on May's shoulders, screaming my name. At first I wondered if I was seeing things, but as they walked toward me in their Mickey Mouse ears, I knew it was real. Mom and I ran over to them and hugged them both. The security officers came over to make sure everyone was OK.

Normally, I would have gotten mad at them for leaving the gift shop and not listening to me when I told them to stay near me, but I was so happy to see them both that all I could do was hug them and cry. Mom was crying too. Neither one of us could stop until June told us it was her idea for May to put June on her shoulders so she could see over the crowd and find me. Then May gave us a demonstration of how she bent down so June could climb on her shoulders, and how she used all of her strength to stand up. I hugged them both really tight again. I told June I was proud of her for coming up with such a smart idea, and I told May I was proud of her for being so strong.

The rest of the evening was a blur. We went to a hotel where Dad had gotten us rooms because, as he said, "The Clunker is officially dead. R.I.P."

I spent most of tonight apologizing for what happened and for not watching May and June more closely. But the truth is, my apologies feel worthless when I think what could have happened to my sisters. Mom and Dad had a very long talk with me about responsibility, kind of like the Winn-Dixie day talk, although this one was different because I agreed with everything they said. I told them there's no punishment they could give me that would be worse than the idea of something bad having happened to my sisters. And I meant it.

I'm just glad they're safe. It's been a long day and I'm glad it's over. I'm glad to be going to sleep in a room with my sisters. And I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't particularly glad this room is air-conditioned.

Wednesday, July 3, 4:17 P.M.

In our room

Two days. Four parks. Five roller coasters. One safari. A jungle trek. A musical. And too many other rides, pins, and autographs to even count. My brain is fried, but in a good way.

Dad just came back to the room. He was in the lobby for a long time renting a car and booking hotel rooms for the rest of our trip.

He seemed very tired, so I offered to take May and June to the lobby to buy some candy and babysit while he and Mom take a nap. He said to keep a close eye on them.

I a.s.sured him that would not be a problem.

6:17 P.M.

A fun afternoon with my sisters!