Caitlin wanted to press, to ask him, now"that this stumbling block was

out of the way, what he thought of her suggestion.

But there was only so far she could push.

Any more -and Graham would back away.

The terrain was more unsteady this time around than the last.

He said nothing as he pulled out of the lot.

His mind struggled with his conscience.

He had meant everything he'd said earlier about believing that things

had turned out for the best.

Marriage just wouldn't have worked out for them.

He'd found out the hard way that he just wasn't husband material.

He hadn't been able to make his marriage last, even for Jake's sake.

Added to that was the clash between their backgrounds.

He had found that he didn't blend in at the reservation or the

all-white high school he had attended.

Always odd man out.

He didn't want to subject Caitlin to that sort of life.

They might have had a past, b there wasn't going to be a future for

them.

It just wouldn't work.

-was thinking of marriage in terms of what he h wanted once.

But it didn't have to work that way now.

didn't have to work at all, something whispered.

It just h to be.

For a given time period.

Just long enough to get permanent custody of Jake, However long that might

take.

His lawyer had looked at him grimly after reviewing t pages in Jake's folder and said that judges tended to rule favor of the mother.

By his own admission, Graham had told the lawyer that Celia had never

physically abused Jake she had just neglected him.

But there had been nothing criminal about it because he had been there to pick up t slack.

It could be effectively argued that she had known this and indulged herself without any harm coming to the bo Now his ex-wife had returned to the scene professing to a changed woman' Certainly her marital status and her financial situation had changed, putting her one up on Grayham, who had neither a spouse nor a healthy bank accou to point to.

The lawyer hadn't pulled any punches.

The scales wou be tipped in Celia's direction.

He had to tip them back in his favor.

Graham search for the right words.

The words that would somehow ma this all right, even when he knew in

his heart that it wasn' Caitlin, I know it's been a rough day,for you.

The air that whizzed by them as they drove was hot.

S felt as if her eyelashes were sweating.

But, damp eyelash not withstanding, it was great to be alive.

She turned, smiling.

"Compared to yesterday at this time, this is a cak walk."

He nodded, falling into silence again.

Bad idea.

You' got to find another way.

"You were going to ask me something?" she promp Unable to take the heat, she lifted her hair up from her nec "I changed my mind," he muttered.

So near and yet so far.Caitlin dropped her hair again."I know talking isn't easy for you.. . ."He'd always been more comfortable in silence.If things weren't said, they didn't have to be taken back."You always knew how to take up the slack.""Flatterer."She could see that the words were there, on his tongue.He just couldn't make himself say them."Okay, do you want me to take up the slack this time?"Yes.No.Damn, there was no simple way to go in this."if it comes with subtitles."Eleven years ago he had slipped a ring on her finger.He hadn't asked then, either, she remembered.Words were not a medium he dealt in comfortably.It had just been understood.All right, she'd help him out."It's a very modern age we're living in, Gray. There are a lot of arrangements being made these days that wouldn't have been tolerated

fifteen, twenty years ago."

He glanced at her, silent, waiting for her to get to the point.

"There are women who, for a fee, will allow themselves to be used as surrogate mothers."

Was she being serious?

Did she really mean that she would be willing to view this as just an.

arrangement, nothing more?

It was a great deal to ask.

But it couldn't be done any other way.

"Go on," he said evenly.

She continued, feeling her way along a rocky terrain with only bravado

to guide her.

"Most of the time they do it for perfect strangers. Your situation right now is kind of like that." Caitlin rushed through the rest of it, afraid he would interrupt her and she would lose momentum.

"You need a surrogate mother for Jake in order to please the court.

I'd like to do that for you."

She'd turned it around, away from the two of them and toward Jake.

But then, he thought, she'd always been clever.

He eased his foot off the gas pedal as the light up ahead changed from

green to yellow.

"You'd really find that agreeable? To marry me for Jake's sake andthen later get a divorce?"She smiled, though it was tinged in sadness."I haven said 'I do' yet and you're already having me say 'I don't."He thought that they'd already been through that part it." Caitlin, I'm not going to ask you to marry me in a real sense of the word.

I don't have anything to offer you.

She knew getting into a discussion over this was futile But if she

didn't tell him this, he wouldn't understand any of it.

"I'm not asking for anything, Gray."

I just want you No, she hadn't asked.

That didn't mean she shouldn have.

They were just too different.

And he was empty i side, except for the love he had for his son.This wasn't going to work, he thought.Not on any level."But I am asking," he said firmly."For you. Yo mother would make your life a living hell f me." i you marn She would handle her mother.She was looking forwa to it."Let me worry about my mother, Gray. After what she' s done, she isn't exactly welcome in my life, anyway." There were more reasons against

this, darker reason He'd seen what had happened when his father had