"Park." Gina answered like she was sure. "We'll go get her," MG stopped to think. She put her hand against her forehead, "I guess we'll go to my house," she paused and turned to Steve, "But no smoking, anything."

He waved at her as he got into the car with Gina and Casey. Ben got in with MG, "You're sure she's at the park?" "Yeah, it's close and," MG hesitated, not wanting to tell Ben Carrie's secrets, "She won't cry in front of anyone."

"Yeah, I know." Carrie was sitting on a swing, facing the woods, her head down, arms wrapped around herself. Ben and MG looked at each other, trying to decide who would go talk to her. MG finally said, "Wait here."

MG's solution was to make Carrie laugh. She tried to pull her off the swing backwards, and they ended up sprawled together in the snow. Carrie laughed a little. Then MG ran back to the car and tried to entice Carrie to come like a dog, "Come on Carrie, come on ... I've got vodka." Carrie rolled over and flipped MG off. "Come on ... come on girl, I'll let you play with the Ben toy." Carrie laughed a little at that, got up off the ground and walked slowly back to the car. Ben moved to the back seat. Carrie got in without saying a word. She faced the door and leaned her head against the cold window all the way to MG's house.

Everyone dropped their coats and shoes on the tile near the back door at MG's house. Carrie was the last one in and they all gave her some space. They knew she didn't like to talk about stuff when she was upset. She went upstairs while the rest of them went into the TV room.

At first Ben felt like he should do something for her. He felt a little out of place alone with her friends, but MG was determined that the party should continue. She pulled a deck of cards from her purse and ordered everyone to gather around the coffee table with a drink. Steve handed Ben a beer, and he joined the group because he really didn't know what else to do.

MG was by far the worst player, but she was a really good sport about it. She wasn't shy at all as she stripped off each sock, then her sweater, then her jeans. When she was down to her bra and panties, she lost another hand. As she reached around her back to unhook her bra, Steve grabbed her hand and hauled her up. "I'll take care of that," he said as he picked her up and carried her away. She was laughing and clearly happy about being alone with him, so Ben didn't think she needed saving.

That left Gina, fully dressed except for one sock and a hair tie; Casey minus everything but her bra, panties and jeans and Ben, who had finally lost his shirt and undershirt a few hands back. He had wanted to take off his socks, but the girls insisted that his shirts had to go.

He didn't really mind, he worked out with weights three days a week, and he was pretty proud of the results. Since he always wore loose button down shirts or his camos, no one else was aware of how muscular he was. Well, now Gina and Casey were, and they were both giving him vodka-laced seductive smiles. GOD! He had an angel on his right shoulder reminding him of Joelle, and a devil on his left, enjoying the view of Casey in her pink, frilly bra. His cock was wanting a vote too, and it was pointing toward the devil.

He finished his second beer and tossed in his cards, "I'm gonna go check on Carrie." The two girls grumbled but cleaned up the cards and the empty slushie cups and beer cans.

Carrie was on MG's bed, curled into a ball, facing the window. Ben whispered her name, but when he got closer he could see that she was asleep, mascara smears on her cheeks and on MG's bright pink pillow case. After the beer, vodka and excitement of the day he gave in to the urge to lay down behind her. They had rarely touched or hugged through the years, but it just seemed natural to his slightly drunk brain to reach out and pull her against him. She didn't pull away or jump, even though his erection was poking the back of her legs. He nuzzled his face into her hair and breathed in. It smelled both beautiful and familiar; it smelled like Carrie. He hoped she was truly passed out because he couldn't resist kissing the top of her head once before he drifted off.

When Carrie woke she wondered if MG had come in a put a blanket over her. She was warm, but she was also pressed into the mattress. She looked down to see a male hand with long fingers draped across her stomach. Ben's hand. She smiled and pressed herself farther back into his warmth. His knees bent to form to hers, his hand slid onto the mattress in front of her and his arm completely covered hers. As his chest rose and fell against her back, she tried to synchronize her breathing to his. Calm seeped into her chest with each tandem deep breath.

In the two years that she had been with Chuck, she had never actually slept in a bed with him. Now she was glad, because this felt so much more intimate and vulnerable than sex ever did. She didn't want to feel anything for Chuck again, and she had already started to build the wall and shut him out of the small place she had allotted him in her heart. She turned slightly and noticed Ben's arm was bare. He must have lost a few hands. She slowly inched her way around till she was facing him on the pillow. She saw the same face she had known since she was six, but now he looked more like a man and less like Dennis the Menace. She felt guilty for a moment that she was laying there, enjoying the warmth and comfort of Joelle's boyfriend, then she remembered that he was the one who climbed in bed with her.

He was one of the good guys; the kind of guy who cared too much, and tried too hard, and believed in God and country, the kind of guy she teased too often. Right now, especially, she was glad he was her friend. He felt like a solid warm rock on a cold, shitty day. She studied the smooth planes of his chest then the defined muscles in his stomach. She tried not to let her mind go there, but she couldn't help but wonder what the rest of his body looked like. Did Joelle know? Did she care? Chuck was skinny, and his skin smelled like cigarettes and pot and unwashed sheets. She felt this way even when she was with him, but she ignored it because being with him had made her feel like somebody, like she was part of the group, the lead singer's girlfriend. Betrayal and hurt started to form a tight ball in her stomach again. She hid in the bend of Ben's shoulder and breathed in, matching her breath to his, and fell asleep again.

It was still daylight when Ben woke to the feel of the end of the bed moving. Carrie had rolled over and was facing him now, her head resting on his pec and her legs entwined with his. He looked up to see MG and Casey sitting on the end of the bed. He almost jumped up to apologize to someone for the position they were in, but they didn't seem fazed at all by him and Carrie snuggling in bed. Carrie woke up too. She looked up at Ben and smiled, then stretched herself out of their entangled position. MG flicked at her toes to get her attention.

When Carrie looked their way, MG and Casey jumped up to show her the tee shirts they had made. Casey had written "CHUCK SUCKS!" on a white tee with purple marker. MG's read, "FUCK CHUCK," then in smaller print below, "Why not, everyone else has."

Carrie laughed, "Those are awesome."

"We're wearing them to his house this weekend, "Casey announced.

Carrie encouraged them, "You do that," but her mood visibly dropped.

MG sat on the bed next to her, "What?"

"I can't go over there again." "You don't have to, we're going for you. We'll go just long enough to make his life hell, then we'll come get you." MG assured her, "There is no way we would pick that stupid loser over you." MG pushed Carrie back on the bed and swiped at her with a small pillow, "Goof."

They had her back. Ben had her back, literally at the moment. Her rush of emotion scared and embarrassed her and she hid behind the pillow but breathed a sigh of relief, "Thanks you guys."

Chapter 14.

The following Friday night no one was going anywhere. It started to snow around 3:00 when school let out. MG drove Carrie home and swore she would be by to pick her up after she and Gina and Casey crashed Chuck's and tortured him, but she called again at 8:00 to say that the roads were too icy and she couldn't go out at all.

Carrie rolled over on her bed and pulled back the curtains. Sure enough, everything was covered in a thick layer of snow, which was still falling, and she could hear a faint tinking sound against her window, ice. She stared up at the night sky. The large white flakes and shiny ice chips were beautiful against the glow of the flood light that hung over their garage, illuminating the driveway.

She considered going downstairs to get Christopher and taking him out in the snow, but he should be going to bed soon. There would be time for snowmen and sledding tomorrow. Maybe they could even talk Ben into helping them make a premium snow fort or igloo. Before he left, Ben's dad taught him how to make amazing tough stuff out of snow. Ben would brag that his dad was a great engineer as Don would pack snow and chisel at corners and form windows. Carrie was always glad to have Ben on her side for snowball fights in the neighborhood. His snow forts were indestructible.

Speaking of Ben , Carrie checked his window across from hers, it was dark. But there were lights on in the basement, he must be down there playing video games.

When he heard knocking on the window Ben figured it had to be Carrie. His friends lived too far to walk, especially on a night like this. He leaned into the glass and put his hand over his eyes to see out into the darkness. A snowball smacked hard against the window, and he jumped back. Carrie leaned her face into the light and laughed her evil "gotcha" laugh at him. He laughed back, but shook his head, then pointed to the back door where he would meet her.

Carrie stomped the snow from her tennis shoes before entering the Gorman's mud room. She peeled off her mittens, winter coat and shoes, but left her wet socks on.

"Where's your mom?" The house was dark and quiet.

Ben shrugged, "Probably in her room watching TV." Carrie nodded. So her mom wasn't the only one who did that. "What are ya doin'?" Carrie asked as they descended the stairs.

"Working."

"On what?" He led her to a workbench full of electronic stuff at the far end of the basement. "I fix electronics," he picked up a small device with lots of buttons. Carrie had no idea what it was.

"So you get paid to do this?"

"Yeah," he smiled, "I do pretty good, a couple hundred a month." Carrie's jaw dropped. No wonder he was always willing to pay for stuff, he was totally raking it in. "Where does all this stuff come from?"

"I don't know. I fixed some stuff for my grandpa and Mr. Warner down the street, and then people just kept bringing more. Now I've got more work than I can keep up with." He gestured to a table full of electronic items, each in a zip lock bag with a name and phone number written on the outside in marker.

"Oh," Carrie thought he might be giving her a hint, "I'll let you get back to work. I just thought you might be playing Nintendo or somethin'." She turned to go.

"No, it's OK," he grabbed the I beam above his head and stretched his arms. "I needed a break. You wanna play some video games?" He turned off the light on the workbench.

Carrie followed him to the plaid couch, the same one that had been in the basement since he got his first game system five years earlier. She was the one he called on Christmas Day to come over and see his new Nintendo and play games with him. She remembered jumping at the chance to get out of her house for a few hours.

Sissy had added a braided rug to the game area and Carrie was grateful. Her toes felt like ice in her wet socks on the cold concrete floor.

Ben was digging through the game cartridges "I got a new Star Wars game, you wanna play that?"

She didn't know a thing about Star Wars, but she had invaded his turf, so she shrugged and said, "Sure." It took less than ten minutes for both of them to be completely frustrated. Carrie had no clue who most of the characters were, and she was no challenge for Ben to play against. When her little Luke guy died again she put the controller down, "Sorry."

Before he could check his frustration, he chastised her, "I told you to hyper drive through the meteor shower using an X Y pattern."

She flinched and whispered, "I have no idea what you are saying." Ben blew out his frustration, more at himself than her. He put his controller on the TV cabinet then rolled up the cord on hers and put it away too. "Sorry. I'm used to playing with Wayne and Pat."

"I guess they're just a lot more fun to play with than me." Ben looked at her with her hair pulled into a messy pony tail, her cheeks and nose still slightly pink from the cold. He chuckled, "I wouldn't say that." He turned back to the TV console and scanned his collection of movies, "Do you want to watch a movie? I must have something we would both like." He started reading titles, "Star Wars, Jurassic Park, Raiders of the Lost Ark . . ."

"Raiders sounds good," Carrie stopped him before he read off all 40 titles. Ben put the movie in, grabbed the remote and without thinking plopped down in his usual spot in the center of the couch, next to Carrie. She put her hand on the cushion between them to scoot away, but she couldn't figure out why she felt the need to. Last week they had snuggled and shared a bed; why would she feel so uncomfortable being close to him now? He looked over at her, the same question written on his face. She eased back down, close to him, which actually felt fantastic because he was putting out some major heat, and she was freezing.

As the movie played Carrie allowed her lighter weight to slide into the deeper dent he made in the sofa. She was leaning against him, and grabbed on to his arm, and squealed and jumped when the Indian guy got stabbed on his way out of the cave.

Ben laughed and grabbed her hand that was clinging to his arm. "Good lord your hands are cold." He wrapped the one close to him in both of his and rubbed. Carrie moved her other hand into the warmth. Ben let go and pressed pause on the remote, "I'm going to get a blanket." He was walking upstairs when he stopped and asked, "Do you want a soda and some popcorn?"

Carrie smiled, "yeah, thanks." She had forgotten how nice it was to be at his house. He was the only guy she knew who was so polite and thoughtful. Even when they were kids he would always offer to get her a snack.

Ben came back with a big quilt Carrie knew his grandma had made, two cans of coke, a microwave bag of popcorn, and, of course, napkins. He draped the quilt over their legs and Carrie couldn't resist sliding her freezing wet socks off and folding her legs up onto the couch. When Ben sat down in the same spot, she let herself naturally slide into the depression created by his weight. He handed her a coke and napkin, set the bag of popcorn between them, and restarted the movie.

In a way, Carrie felt like a kid again. She had sat on this same couch, eating popcorn and drinking coke so many times before. Only tonight it all felt different too. They weren't eight anymore, and she couldn't help but be aware of her physical reaction to being close to him. Did she keep scooting closer for his warmth, or because she wanted him to touch her? She glanced at him and studied him for as long as she dared. The way the muscles in his neck flexed when he drank caught her attention. She wanted to lean over and nestle her cold nose into him and smell clean skin and his laundry-detergent scented shirt. She forced her eyes back to the TV screen and tried to force her thoughts in a different direction.

He has a girlfriend, a serious girlfriend . Carrie had heard through the grapevine this week that Joelle had a promise ring from him. She had also heard that Joelle was majorly pissed about them kidnapping Ben. She really didn't want to ruin things for Ben with Joelle. If she made him happy, then they should be together. Carrie decided that she must be rebounding. She had been with Chuck for a long time, so all this attraction she was feeling for Ben must be her missing Chuck. Only Chuck never sat close to her, and got her snacks, and watched movies with her. How could she miss things she never had?

Ben hadn't intended to get himself in this position again. The first time he blamed it on the beer and vodka, he couldn't blame this on a coke. He didn't want to admit to himself how much he was still attracted to Carrie. When he was thirteen, and she kissed him, he dreamed of her, he obsessed about her, he fantasized about her, and he made sure she never knew. She was out of his league then.

But now, things were different. They were still in different worlds, socially, but he didn't feel like a little geek kid she would never be interested in anymore. He wouldn't have to stand on a five inch stump to reach her lips. She needed the stump now to reach him. He had always been smart, but now he was strong, and competent, and sure of himself. Yeah, he thought, just like I was so sure of myself when I gave Joelle that ring.

It wasn't making things any easier that she was pressed up against his side, her hands tucked under his arm to keep warm and to grab on to him when the movie was scary. He hated to compare her to Joelle, but it felt great that she wasn't constantly guarding against his touch, that when she leaned into him, it was because she wanted to, and not just to make him happy.

He swallowed the rest of the coke from his can, then put it on the floor along with the empty popcorn bag, and used napkins. Carrie handed him her empty can, and in the process, leaned across him. All he would have to do was lay back and momentum would have her laying on him again, just like last Friday. He was so tempted. He compromised and leaned back a little, waiting to see if she would follow him, hoping she would.

She questioned him with her eyes; should she? Was this what he wanted? He put his arm around her and pulled her down onto his chest as his guilty conscious screamed at him to stop. But his heart and his hormones were winning tonight. He had dreamed of this exact scenario too many times. Now, if she would just let him kiss her, and see and feel her naked body ... he forced his focus back to the movie and turned his hips slightly forward so she couldn't feel him getting hard. He was crossing so many lines already, he didn't need to get his overeager cock involved too.

When the movie ended Carrie considered pretending to be asleep. She wanted to lie on Ben's chest under the heavy quilt for the rest of the night, maybe longer.

Why didn't she ever feel this way about Chuck? Would she want to lie against Chuck and watch a movie? Not really. First, Chuck always smelled of pot and cigarettes and sometimes BO. Her physical attraction for him died off a long time ago, and she just let momentum carry her after that. And even if they could pick a movie to watch together, it wouldn't feel the same. If her hands were cold, he wouldn't warm them for her. He would want her to order a pizza if they were hungry and get them beers from the downstairs fridge. And, he wouldn't pause the movie if she did go get beer. He wasn't mean, but he didn't think about what she might want or need. Her mind traveled to all the nights they had sex in his room. Sometimes it felt like he barely noticed she was there, that she could be anyone as long as he ended up feeling good. Which led her back to exactly where she didn't want to go. What would it be like to have sex with Ben? She would want to touch his warm, smooth skin and explore all his muscles, and he would care about her, how she was feeling, what she wanted.

Carrie sat up abruptly, letting cold air rush between them, cutting off her wayward thoughts. She couldn't look at Ben. Both of them skirted around each other; throwing away trash, putting the movie away, folding the blanket.

Carrie finally spoke as she headed for the stairs, "Thanks . . .for the movie." Well, that was awkward; the first time she had ever thanked him for watching a movie with her.