FRANKIE'S BISTRO.

UPSTAIRS DINING ROOM.

9:30 PM PM.

November 8th Todd stood up and raised his virgin colada high in the air.

"I'd like to make a toast," he said as he tapped a fork against the side of his gla.s.s. "To the greatest designers on the planet ..."

"To the greatest designers on the planet," the Blocks and the Lyonses repeated, looking at the two girls at the end of the table.

"Abercrombie and Fitch," Todd said.

Todd was pelted with a few half-eaten dinner rolls and dirty napkins. The parents never would have allowed that if they hadn't been in the restaurant's private upstairs dinning room.

"No, really," he said. "Even though I voted for Alicia, I think you guys did an amazing job tonight."

A b.u.t.ter packet hit the side of his head, courtesy of Ma.s.sie.

"I love it when you get angry, my pet," he said.

Jay and Judi Lyons rolled their eyes at their son's behavior as they tried to keep themselves from laughing.

"'Kay, I'm being serious now." Todd reached under the table and pulled out three lilacs for Ma.s.sie. "They're purple, your favorite color."

A round of gasps and "ahhh's" were heard from the parents.

"That's very sweet, Todd, but I will never, ever, ever, ever be your girlfriend," Ma.s.sie said as she sniffed the flowers.

"Never say never, ever, ever, ever," Todd said with a suave wink. He puckered his lips.

Ma.s.sie winced and wiped her mouth with her wrist.

"And Claire, my darling sister, I wrote you this note just to let you know how proud I am of you."

Claire eyed the folded envelope in his clammy hand. She took it slowly and cautiously as if she were expecting it to explode in her face. She ran her pinky finger along the flap and tore it open, never once taking her suspicious eyes off her brother.

"Should I read it out loud?" Claire asked.

"It's a little emotional. Maybe you should take it to the bathroom," Todd suggested.

Claire knew something was up. She had only seen her brother get emotional once, when Nathan beat him at his brand new Formula 1 video game.

"Okay," Claire said as she pushed her chair away from the table and stood up. "Mom, will you order me a fudge sundae?"

Once Claire was in the bathroom, she took the letter out of the envelope and started reading. After the first sentence she lifted her head and looked around for hidden cameras.

"This has to be a joke," she said to the bathroom attendant.

"'Scuse me, honey?"

"Nothing," Claire said. She locked herself in a stall so she could have a little privacy.

DEAR CLAIRE,YOU MUST HAVE REALLY HATED THE CD I MADE YOU CUZ YOU NEVER GOT BACK TO ME ABOUT THE MOVIE. ANYWAY, I THOUGHT YOUR UNIFORM WAS AWESOME AND I THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE WON.-CAMP. S. THE KEDS WERE A COOL TOUCH.

Claire read the note four more times before she left the stall. She had so many questions, but the first one was for Todd.

She hugged her brother to thank him for his "sweet note," and when she was close to his ear, she whispered, "How did you get this?"

"He gave it to me to give to you," Todd said quietly.

"Why did you say you wrote it?" Claire asked, still holding him close.

"Cuz I got Ma.s.sie flowers and I didn't have anything for you. I felt guilty."

Claire hugged her brother again.

"Do you know anything about a CD?" Claire asked.

"Uh, yeah," Todd said. "I've been meaning to give it to you. It's killer."

Claire would have punched him, but she was much too happy.

The waiter came with a cart filled with desserts: pies, cakes, cookies, flans, and tarts. Mr. Block asked for one of everything because they were celebrating.

"What could we possibly be celebrating, Dad?" Ma.s.sie asked. She stuffed a spoonful of b.u.t.terscotch ice cream in her mouth.

"That you don't have to wear that horrible sweater set Ann Marie Blanc came up with," he said.

Everyone laughed and praised the fashion G.o.ds for small miracles.

"Yeah, but now we have to wear strappy sandals," Claire said.

"Not if my smart, brilliant, powerful, handsome father donates a building or something to the fashion department so we can wear what we want again." Ma.s.sie batted her eyelashes and tossed in a few "pretty please's" for effect.

Claire saw Mr. Block's face soften and decided to join in.

"Oh, please, William. Pleeease."

"Look who has suddenly taken an interest in fashion," Judi Lyons said to her daughter.

"Would you be begging William to fix things if you girls won tonight?" Claire's father asked.

"We did win and I'm still-"

Claire felt the pointy toe of Ma.s.sie's boot jab her shin.

"Ouch," Claire said.

"Weeds," Ma.s.sie mouthed.

Claire looked at her with a sincere apology in her eyes and Ma.s.sie smiled.

"What do you mean, you won?" Jay asked.

"Well, not literally, Dad," Claire said. "I mean I won because I had a good time."

Claire got another kick under the table, but this one was softer. Ma.s.sie made a face like she was trying to suppress her giggles. Claire knew she had done well.

"When did you change out of your Keds?" Claire whispered. She was rubbing her leg under the table.

"Immediately after the show," Ma.s.sie said.

They laughed.

For that one moment Claire stopped being afraid of Ma.s.sie. The girl with the amber eyes was no longer a mysterious she-devil. She stressed over outfits, got stabbed in the back by her friends, liked sugary desserts, and didn't always win, even when she deserved to. Ma.s.sie was a regular person. She just knew how to hide it.

Claire watched Ma.s.sie wipe the sides of her mouth with a cloth napkin and reapply a fresh coat of lip gloss. And she began to understand why Ma.s.sie waited so long to accept her.

Like the right to wear a Dirty Devil costume, Ma.s.sie's friendship wasn't something Claire was ent.i.tled to: it was something she had earn. And she had finally done it.

Claire slid her hand into the back pocket of her Gap jeans and touched the folded note from Cam to make sure it was still there.

I'll show it to Ma.s.sie after dinner, she thought. Claire couldn't wait to see her reaction. She imagined they would hug, jump up and down, and read it over and over again until they knew every word by heart. Claire had a feeling life with Ma.s.sie was about to get really exciting. she thought. Claire couldn't wait to see her reaction. She imagined they would hug, jump up and down, and read it over and over again until they knew every word by heart. Claire had a feeling life with Ma.s.sie was about to get really exciting.

Q&A.

LISI HARRISON Answers Questions from her Readers When will THE CLIQUE THE CLIQUE be a movie? Can I please play Ma.s.sie? be a movie? Can I please play Ma.s.sie?

Everyone asks this question. EVERYONE! And I wish I had better news for you. I really do. All I know is that there are powerful, suit-wearing people in Hollywood trying to make this happen. But until they do, you'll have to keep reading the books and imagine yourself saying the lines. As soon as I get an update I will post it on LisiHarrison. net. Pinky-swear.

And for all you wannabe Ma.s.sies out there: Practice your comebacks and keep honing your inner queen bee. That way you'll be ready if opportunity knocks!

Who are the girls on the cover supposed to be?

Is the one in the middle Ma.s.sie or Alicia? Where is Claire? And why are there only three of them and not four? The girls on the covers are models, meant to represent a clique, not The girls on the covers are models, meant to represent a clique, not the the Clique. It's up to you to decide based on my description and your imagination what Ma.s.sie, Claire, Alicia, Kristen, and Dylan look like. So if the girl in the middle looks like Alicia to you, then fine, she's Alicia. And if she doesn't then that's fine too. Whatevs. Clique. It's up to you to decide based on my description and your imagination what Ma.s.sie, Claire, Alicia, Kristen, and Dylan look like. So if the girl in the middle looks like Alicia to you, then fine, she's Alicia. And if she doesn't then that's fine too. Whatevs.

Which character is most like you?

I kind of have all the characters in me to some extent. I'm like Ma.s.sie because I love fashion, clever comebacks, and my puppy Bee Bee. But I am not a bully and would never want to make anyone cry, especially my friends.

I'm like Claire because I try to accept myself for who I am.

I'm like Dylan because I think burps are funny and I love to eat.

I'm like Layne because I think unique is chic. And I go through food obsession phases. This week I can't get enough of those little egg rolls filled with pizza.

The characters I am not like at all are Kristen because I stink at sports and Alicia because I have small b.o.o.bs and I would never follow anyone.

How are you able to write for seventh graders when you are clearly no longer in the seventh grade?

Simple. I WAS WAS in the seventh grade at one point in my life and I remember what it feels like to wake up in the morning and wonder if my friends will still like me, even though I did nothing wrong. I also remember what it feels like to gang up on someone else because, well, better them than me, right? We've all been Ma.s.sies and we've all been Claires at one point or another, and those feelings of abusing and being abused never go away. in the seventh grade at one point in my life and I remember what it feels like to wake up in the morning and wonder if my friends will still like me, even though I did nothing wrong. I also remember what it feels like to gang up on someone else because, well, better them than me, right? We've all been Ma.s.sies and we've all been Claires at one point or another, and those feelings of abusing and being abused never go away.

How did you come up with the idea to write about cliques?

I worked at MTV for ten years, and it reminded me a lot of middle school. People were always trying to fit in with the "cool" crowd, and it brought back a lot of memories. I'd hear things like, Who are you hanging out with this weekend? Did you get invited to any cool parties? Where did you buy that outfit? Who did you eat lunch with today? Who are you hanging out with this weekend? Did you get invited to any cool parties? Where did you buy that outfit? Who did you eat lunch with today?

Sound familiar? It wasn't long before I realized that cliques and the desire to be accepted don't go away when you get older. They just get easier to laugh at. And that's why I wrote THE CLIQUE THE CLIQUE as a comedy and not a heart-wrenching drama. Sometimes the way we act is so pathetic it's funny. as a comedy and not a heart-wrenching drama. Sometimes the way we act is so pathetic it's funny.

Any advice for wannabe writers?

1. Write every day. It doesn't have to be good or interesting or grammatically correct. Just write anyway. It will keep your juices flowing, and I guarantee that by the end of each session you will have at least one good sentence that you can use in the future.

2. Read a lot. And read the stuff you like, not the stuff you think think you should like. Because chances are you will write in the genre you like to read. So it's important to know how other people are doing it. you should like. Because chances are you will write in the genre you like to read. So it's important to know how other people are doing it.

3. Carry a little notebook everywhere you go. If you see something funny, write it down. If you meet someone with a cool name, write it down. If you think of an interesting story idea while you're on the bus, write it down. Get it? So the next time you're racking your brain for details or ideas they will be right there in your ah-dorable little notebook.

4. If someone tells you you'll never be a writer, put on your pointiest boots, take a deep breath, and kick them in the shin.

Write about that that!

How many CLIQUE CLIQUE books will there be? books will there be?

Right now there will be eight. But if you want more, I'll write more.

Are you going to write other stuff?

Totally! I am always thinking of new and different ideas. My next novel is about fifteen-year-olds at summer camp.

Any advice for people that go to clique-y schools?

For starters, you have to understand why mean girls are mean.

They are insecure.

I know that's hard to believe because they're probably pretty, popular, stylish, and outgoing. But trust me, it's true. Girls who put other girls down do it to feel better about themselves. So keep that in mind next time a pack of wild meanie weenies treats you like a loser. Know that they are the pathetic ones and simply walk away. And stop, stop, stop trying to be accepted by them. Do you seriously think you'd be happier if you were friends with them? Puh-lease!

Go find someone who shares your real interests and hang with her or him. It's better to have one real friend than a hundred fake ones. Given!

Where can I get the Glossip Girl lip gloss you write about in Invasion of the Boy s.n.a.t.c.hers?

Sorry, sisters. I made the whole thing up. I only wish there were a Lip-Gloss-of-the-Day Club that delivered a new flavor of gloss to my front door every morning. But until then, just imagine you're getting it. And while you're at it, can you think of some cool new flavors? I'm running out of ideas.

Done. Done. And Done.