Ballads By William Makepeace Thackeray - Part 20
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Part 20

[Of the majors and captains.]

There was muster and roll-calls, and repairing city walls, And filling up of fosses: And the captains and the majors, gallant and courageous, A-riding about on their hosses.

[The fortifications and artillery.]

To be guarded at all hours they built themselves watch-towers, With every tower a man on; And surely and secure, each from out his embrasure, Looked down the iron cannon!

[Of the conduct of the actors and the clergy.]

A battle-song was writ for the theatre, where it Was sung with vast energy And rapturous applause; and besides, the public cause, Was supported by the clergy.

The pretty ladies'-maids were pinning of c.o.c.kades, And tying on of sashes; And dropping gentle tears, while their lovers bl.u.s.ter'd fierce, About gunshot and gashes;

[Of the ladies;]

The ladies took the hint, and all day were sc.r.a.ping lint, As became their softer genders; And got bandages and beds for the limbs and for the heads Of the city's brave defenders.

[And, finally, of the taylors.]

The men, both young and old, felt resolute and bold, And panted hot for glory; Even the tailors 'gan to brag, and embroidered on their flag, "AUT WINCERE AUT MORI."

X.

[Of the Cossack chief,--his stratagem;]

Seeing the city's resolute condition, The Cossack chief, too cunning to despise it, Said to himself, "Not having ammunition Wherewith to batter the place in proper form, Some of these nights I'll carry it by storm, And sudden escalade it or surprise it.

[And the burghers' sillie victorie.]

"Let's see, however, if the cits stand firmish."

He rode up to the city gates; for answers, Out rushed an eager troop of the town elite, And straightway did begin a gallant skirmish: The Cossack hereupon did sound retreat, Leaving the victory with the city lancers.

[What prisoners they took,]

They took two prisoners and as many horses, And the whole town grew quickly so elate With this small victory of their virgin forces, That they did deem their privates and commanders So many Caesars, Pompeys, Alexanders, Napoleons, or Fredericks the Great.

[And how conceited they were.]

And puffing with inordinate conceit They utterly despised these Cossack thieves; And thought the ruffians easier to beat Than porters carpets think, or ushers boys.

Meanwhile, a sly spectator of their joys, The Cossack captain giggled in his sleeves.

[Of the Cossack chief,--his orders;]

"Whene'er you meet yon stupid city hogs."

(He bade his troops precise this order keep), "Don't stand a moment--run away, you dogs!"

'Twas done; and when they met the town battalions, The Cossacks, as if frightened at their valiance, Turned tail, and bolted like so many sheep.

[And how he feigned a retreat.]

They fled, obedient to their captain's order: And now this bloodless siege a month had lasted, When, viewing the country round, the city warder (Who, like a faithful weatherc.o.c.k, did perch Upon the steeple of St. Sophy's church), Sudden his trumpet took, and a mighty blast he blasted.

[The warder proclayms the Cossacks' retreat, and the citie greatly rejoyces.]

His voice it might be heard through all the streets (He was a warder wondrous strong in lung), "Victory, victory! the foe retreats!"

"The foe retreats!" each cries to each he meets; "The foe retreats!" each in his turn repeats.

G.o.ds! how the guns did roar, and how the joy-bells rung!

Arming in haste his gallant city lancers, The mayor, to learn if true the news might be, A league or two out issued with his prancers.

The Cossacks (something had given their courage a damper) Hastened their flight, and 'gan like mad to scamper: Blessed be all the saints, Kiova town was free!

XI.

Now, puffed with pride, the mayor grew vain, Fought all his battles o'er again; And thrice he routed all his foes, and thrice he slew the slain.

'Tis true he might amuse himself thus, And not be very murderous; For as of those who to death were done The number was exactly NONE, His lordship, in his soul's elation, Did take a bloodless recreation--

[The manner of the citie's rejoycings,]

Going home again, he did ordain A very splendid cold collation For the magistrates and the corporation; Likewise a grand illumination, For the amus.e.m.e.nt of the nation.

That night the theatres were free, The conduits they ran Malvolsie; Each house that night did beam with light And sound with mirth and jollity;

[And its impiety.]

But shame, O shame! not a soul in the town, Now the city was safe and the Cossacks flown, Ever thought of the bountiful saint by whose care The town had been rid of these terrible Turks-- Said even a prayer to that patroness fair, For these her wondrous works!

[How the priest, Hyacinth, waited at church, and n.o.body came thither.]

Lord Hyacinth waited, the meekest of priors-- He waited at church with the rest of his friars; He went there at noon and he waited till ten, Expecting in vain the lord-mayor and his men.

He waited and waited from mid-day to dark; But in vain--you might search through the whole of the church, Not a layman, alas! to the city's disgrace, From mid-day to dark showed his nose in the place.

The pew-woman, organist, beadle, and clerk, Kept away from their work, and were dancing like mad Away in the streets with the other mad people, Not thinking to pray, but to guzzle and tipple Wherever the drink might be had.

XII.

[How he went forth to bid them to prayer.]

Amidst this din and revelry throughout the city roaring, The silver moon rose silently, and high in heaven soaring; Prior Hyacinth was fervently upon his knees adoring: "Towards my precious patroness this conduct sure unfair is; I cannot think, I must confess, what keeps the dignitaries And our good mayor away, unless some business them contraries."

He puts his long white mantle on and forth the prior sallies-- (His pious thoughts were bent upon good deeds and not on malice): Heavens! how the banquet lights they shone about the mayor's palace!

[How the grooms and lackeys jeered him.]

About the hall the scullions ran with meats both and fresh and potted; The pages came with cup and can, all for the guests allotted; Ah, how they jeered that good fat man as up the stairs he trotted!

He entered in the ante-rooms where sat the mayor's court in; He found a pack of drunken grooms a-dicing and a-sporting; The horrid wine and 'bacco fumes, they set the prior a-snorting!

The prior thought he'd speak about their sins before he went hence, And l.u.s.tily began to shout of sin and of repentance; The rogues, they kicked the prior out before he'd done a sentence!