Around the World with Josiah Allen's Wife - Part 11
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Part 11

And eucalyptus and begoniea and algebora with its lovely foliage, and pepper trees and bananas and pomegranates and tamarind and bread fruit and rose apples, tastin' and smellin' a good deal like a rosy. And magnificent oleanders and fuchias and geraniums and every other beautiful tree and blossom you ever hearn on.

And take it with these rich colored posies and luxuriant green foliage and the white suits and hats of the men, and the gay colored clothing of the women we met, lots of them with wreaths of flowers round their necks hangin' most to their feet, take it all together it wuz a seen long, long to be remembered. And then we walked up on Punch Bowl Hill, five hundred feet above the level of the sea, and looked off on a broad beautiful picture of sea, mountain and valley soft and beautiful and a-bloom with verdure, and anon bold, rugged and sublime, and I sez to Josiah:

"This very place where we're standin' now wuz once a volcano and belched forth flames, and that also," sez I, pintin' to Tantalus that riz up two thousand feet. "And," sez I, "they say that the view from that is glorious."

"Well," sez he, "I guess we hadn't better climb up there; it might bust out agin. And I wouldn't have you sot fire to, Samantha, for a thousand worlds like this," (he didn't want the work of climbin', that wuz it). And I didn't argy with him, for I thought it would be quite a pull for us to git up there and git Tommy up, and I didn't know as the child ort to climb so fur, so I didn't oppose my pardner when he propsed to go back to the tarven, and we santered back through the streets filled with citizens of all countries and dressed accordin', to the grounds around the tarven. We put Tommy into a hammock and sot down peaceful nigh by him. The sun shone down gloriously out of a clear blue sky, but we sot in the shade and so enjoyed it, the bammy air about us seemed palpitating with langrous beauty and fragrance, and I sez to my pardner:

"Don't this remind you, Josiah, of what we've heard Thomas J. read about:

"'The island valley of Avileon Where falls not rain nor hail nor any snow.'"

"Where it seems always afternoon."

"I d'no," sez Josiah, "as I ever hearn of such a land. I never wuz any hand to lay abed all the forenoon."

"But, Josiah, there is sunthin' so dreamy and soothin', so restful in the soft slumbrous atmosphere, it seems as if one could jest lay down in that hammock, look off onto the entrancin' beauty around, breathin' the soft balmy air, and jest lay there forever."

"I guess," sez he, "that the dinner bell would be apt to roust you out the second or third day."

But Miss Meechim jined us at jest this minute, and she sez to me, "I feel just as you do, I feel as though I would fain dwell here forever."

And Josiah sez: "I believe it would be a good thing for you, Miss Meechim, to stay here right along; you could probable do considerable good here preachin' to the natives aginst marriage, they're pretty apt to marry too much if they're let alone, and you might curb 'em in some." (Josiah can't bear Miss Meechim, her idees on matrimony are repugnant to him.) But she didn't argy with him. She sez: "Robert is planning a trip to the Pali, and wants to know if you won't join us."

And Josiah says, "Who is Pali?"

And she sez, "It is the precipice five hundred feet high, where King Kamehameha drove off his enemies."

Well, we wuz agreeable and jined the party. Robert had got a wagonette and he and Dorothy, Miss Meechim and Arvilly and Josiah and I jest filled the seats, Tommy sot in Josiah's lap or between us.

It is quite a long ride to the Pali, but we didn' realize it, because the scenery all along is so lovely and so novel. That view from the top I hain't a-goin' to try to describe, nor I sha'n't let Josiah try; I don't like to have that man flat out in his undertakin's. Good land!

do you want us to tell how many sands there wuz on the flashing white beach that stretched out milds and milds? And we might as well as to describe that enchantin' panorama and take up all the different threads of glory that lay before us and embroider 'em on language. No, you must see 'em for yourself, and then you hain't goin' to describe 'em. I d'no but Carabi could. I hearn Tommy talkin' and "wonnerin'" to him as he stood awestruck beside me, but no mortal can.

Well, I thought I must not slight the volcano Kilauea, which means the House of Everlasting Fire. And how that volcano and everything in Hawaii reminded me of the queen who once rained here--and the interview I once had with her. We happened to be visitors to the same summer resort. You know she lives in Washington, D. C., now.

I sent word that I wuz there and craved a augence, which wuz gladly granted. She had hearn of me and I had hearn of her, which made everything agreeable. So at the appinted hour I wuz ushered by one of her hired men into her presence. I liked her looks first rate; of course she hain't what you may call handsome, and her complection is pretty middlin' dark, but she has a good look and a good way with her.

She came forward and greeted me with great cordiality and gin the hand I extended a warm grasp, and I hern visey versey, and sez she:

"I am glad to see you, Josiah Allen's wife." And I sez, speakin' the name Liliukolani well as I could, "I also am glad to hail the Queen of the Sandwich Islands."

That tickled her, and she sez: "I was not deceived in you; you are one who can recognize royalty if the cloud of adversity and trouble is wreathin' it in its black folds."

And I sez, "Clouds often covers the sun and moon, but the light is there jest the same." I felt to pity her as she went on and related her troubles to me. Her throne kicked out from under her by them that wanted to set down on it, the high chairs of her loyal friends took by her enemies who craved the soft cushions. Even her private property grabbed away from her. Why, how should any of us feel to have a neighbor walk in when we wuz havin' a family quarrel and jest clean us out of everything--kitchen stove, bureau, bed and beddin' and everything; why, it would rile us to our depths, any on us.

She sez, "I feel that my kingdom wuz stole away from me." And I sez:

"I know jest how you feel. There wuz a woodsy island down in our creek that Josiah had called hisen for years and years, rained peaceful and prosperous over so we spozed, it made a dretful handy place for our young stock to stand in the shade in the summer, and our ducks and geese jest made their hum there, but what should Bill Yerden do when he bought the old Shelmadine place but jest scoop up that island and try to prove that it wuz hisen. It wuz jest stealin', Josiah and I always felt so. But he wuz down with tizik at the time, and I wore out nussin' him, and Bill put bob iron fence round it, real sharp bobs, too, and we had to gin in. Of course it wuzn't a big spot, but we despised the idee of havin' it took from us just as much as though it wuz the hull contient of Asia, and we can't git over it, Josiah nor me can't. And I know jest how you feel, and I sympathize with you."

And she sez, "Sympathy is sweet, but justice is sweeter."

And I sez, "That is so, but when you can't git justice, sympathy is better than nothin'."

"Yes," sez she, "I know it, but I am lookin' forward to the day when I shall git my rights agin. I am jest as much a queen as Queen Alexandra is to-day, and my kingdom is just as much mine."

Sez I, "That is just the way Josiah and I feel; we can't help lookin'

forward to gittin' our rights, but don't spoze we ever shall, for life is short, and Josiah don't want any more of our live stock tore up on them bobs; and, as I've said to Josiah many a time, Bill Yerden feels guilty, or he wouldn't rare up such sharp defences round it."

Well, we had a good deal more of jest such profitable and interestin'

talk as two such great wimmen would naterally, and we parted away from each other with a cordial hand shake and mutual good feelin'. But she called me back and sez she: "I want to give you one word of solemn warnin' before we part," and I stopped stun still and listened.

"I don't know," sez she, "as you'll ever be a queen."

"Well, mebby not," sez I, "but I am thought a sight on in Jonesville, and there is no knowin' what may happen."

"Well," sez she, "if you ever are a queen, a ruler of a kingdom, don't let any other nation protect you. Protectin'," sez she, "has been the ruin of more than one individual and nation."

And I promised her that I would look out for it if I ever wuz a queen, but reminded her that there wuz times too when it came handy, and saved our necks to be protected, and then I finished, gracefully backin' out of her presence. I like her first rate, and believe she is a likely woman; I believe she has been lied about, she jest the same as told me she had; if she wuz a woman that took in washin's for a livin' there wouldn't have been so much said about her. Why, it is jest as easy for envious folks to run them high in position and try to demean 'em as it is to fall off a log.

CHAPTER X

Some of the party felt that they couldn't leave the islands without seein' the great Kilauea and some didn't care to go. I felt that I must see it and so did Arvilly, and Josiah looked on me as fondly and proudly as if I myself wuz a volcano and said, "If Samantha goes I shall." Robert Strong wanted to go and so did Dorothy; Miss Meechim didn't feel like going and offered to take care of Tommy with the help of Aronette. Elder Wessel wouldn't go, for Lucia wuzn't very well and he felt that she had better stay and rest at the tarven, and I spozed that Aronette and Lucia would have a pretty good time, for they always seemed to when they wuz together. Evangeline n.o.ble was visiting some friends of hers on the island. There wuz a smart young English clergyman goin' with us and a Scotchman, both good lookin' and good actin'. The Scotchman wuz Sir Duncan Ramsey and didn't act any more sot up than if he wuz a plain mister. He paid considerable attention to Dorothy, too, but Miss Meechim said that she didn't worry about Dorothy at all since I would chaperone her, and Robert wuz going to protect her from any possible lover. Sez Miss Meechim:

"Robert knows that I would almost rather have that volcano burst forth its burning lava and wash her away on its bosom than to have her engulfed in that terrible state of matrimony from which I and mine have suffered so horribly."

"Well," sez I, "I can't speak for you and yourn, but for me and ourn,"

sez I, "no state under the heavens would be agreeable for me to live in if my beloved pardner wuzn't in it too."

"Oh, well," sez she, "exceptions prove the rule; your husband is congenial and good to you."

"Oh, well," sez I, "as to the daily acts and queer moves of pardners the least said the soonest mended, but Love is the great ruler; where he rules any state is blest, be it torrid or frigid."

That evenin' Arvilly and Elder Wessel had a argument about votin' and other things. I knew I ort to be in my room packin' my satchel bag, for we expected to be gone a week or ten days, but I did kinder want to hear how their talk come out. He said he didn't vote; he said he thought it wuz a clergyman's duty to set and judge of the right and wrong of actions, not take part in 'em.

And Arvilly says, "I always spozed the Almighty did that; I didn't know as human men wuz obleeged to. I know he cursed them that dealt in strong drink, and blest them that gin even a cup of cold water to the little ones, which I spoze meant help to the poorest and lowest. And I guess that whatever your idees are about it, when you come to the judgment day you won't set up there on the throne judgin', but you'll be down with the rest on us givin' an account of how you've used your talents, your influence, and if you've wropped your mantilly of protection around thieves and murderers that you know the whiskey trade is made of; you'll find that it will drop off there, and you will be judged accordin' to your works. But mebby you'll be made to see before you git there that you're in the wrong on't upholdin' this evil."

Arvilly's axent wuz as sharp as any simeter, and it seemed to go right through Elder Wessel's robe of complacency and self-esteem and rend it. He looked dretful bad, and I spoke up, meanin' to pour a little ile on his woonds, and sayin' what I thought, too. Sez I:

"Folks hain't so guilty often as they are thoughtless; ministers and church people who don't use their influence aginst this evil don't realize what they're doin'--they don't think."

"They're guilty if they don't think," sez Arvilly, "if they are blest with common sense. If I wuz walkin' by a deep pond in broad daylight, and see a dozen little children sinking that I might save by a little effort, I wonder how many would believe me when I said that I see 'em drowndin' but didn't try to save 'em because I didn't think. If I had ears and eyes and common sense, and could save 'em and didn't, I wuz guilty of murder, and so the Lord would look at it and everybody else that knew anything." And she looked at me some as if I didn't know anything, jest because I intimated that ministers and church members didn't want to do such wickedness, but didn't think--Arvilly is hash.

But I had to admit that she had some common sense on her side. Sez she agin:

"The Church of Christ could do anything it wanted to if it jined its forces, took holt as if it meant to do sunthin', but as it is indifference folds its hands, self interest murders humanity, greed upholds intemperance, and all about us in Church and State are drink makers and drink takers, and heaven knows which of 'em will git to h.e.l.l first!" Arvilly is dretful hash; when she gits rousted up her indignation is like lightnin', and she don't care where it strikes or who. It struck Elder Wessel hard.

"I should be afraid!" sez he, and his voice fairly trembled with indignation, "I should be afraid to talk of the Church of Christ as you do!"