"Please don't think less of me for doing this," I'd quickly begged. "Or tell anyone that I did it. I'm not worried about what would happen to me, but the guy who did it is...special to me. I don't want it to blow back on him."

"Felicity, I would never have asked this of you, but... thank you," she'd whispered. "Thank you."

I'd just given her a small, grim smile. "Maybe you can sleep a little easier at night now."

"Maybe." She'd glanced out the window of the office but I doubted she actually saw any of the beautiful scenery.

Tears had stung my eyes as I'd gotten to my feet. All too quickly I'd let her and her strange little family into my heart.

The next time I'd seen Seller I'd asked him about Jet. He must have known about the guy who had been in the fight with Grady. He would be able to tell me if Jet had gotten into trouble for killing the vile man.

"As far as I know it was ruled self-defense, Miss Bolton. I believe Mr. Hannigan will be released on time in a few weeks."

That was supposed to be at the end of last summer. I'd had the date marked on my calendar in my room at my mother's house. I'd been counting down the days until Jet was home all the way up until I'd left. After I'd started working for Emmie, I'd still counted the days, mentally reminding myself every night as I'd gone to bed how many more sleeps it would be until Jet would be home with his family.

I didn't kid myself that he might come looking for me once he was home. I knew he was glad to be rid of me. I'd just been his sister's best friend who had loved him so obsessively and ruined his life. He was probably deep in Bubbles or one of the other sheep right now.

Jealousy sliced through me like a blade through flesh. Grabbing the phone, I headed off the bus. I ignored the big men standing by the front door and the others stationed around the perimeter of the bus. I needed to clear my head, walk in the cooling night air and maybe even shed a few tears without the fear of someone seeing them.

As I walked past all the other buses toward the darkened street, I held the phone against my chest. It was my last lifeline to my old life, one I was missing more and more with each pa.s.sing day. But it was a life I couldn't return to. Not now. That life would suck the rest of my spirit-h.e.l.l, my frigging will to live-right out of me. I was needed here with Emmie and her family.

It was nice to be needed for a change.

Lord knew I'd never been needed before. My mother hadn't needed me, hadn't even wanted me. I didn't know why she hadn't just had an abortion to rid her of the 'problem' in the first place. I'd needed Raven, but I didn't think she'd needed me. Maybe she had a little, but not enough. Jet hadn't needed me, that was for sure. For a few months a helpless little life had needed me, but Westcliffe had destroyed my chances of ever holding that precious little baby. From what the doctors had told me the night I'd miscarried, I might never have a baby of my own. He'd been thorough in his beating, after all.

Westcliffe had left me alive, but he'd taken my will to live when he'd killed the baby that had been growing inside of me, taking away my last connection to the man I'd loved-and, stupidly, still loved.

Emmie's family had given me back the will I needed to keep going. I'd found a purpose with them. I'd found myself again, and I actually liked the me I was when I was with them.

I still missed everyone though. Not the life, but the people. I even missed my mother.

Stopping under a streetlight, I glared down at my burner phone. I picked up a new one every few weeks, using cash instead of a credit card. The Club's connections were far reaching and I wouldn't put it past them to find me through them. I never used the phone though, but I couldn't keep from wanting-needing-that small link to them.

My thumb punched in Raven's home number and then hovered over the connect b.u.t.ton. I shouldn't-it was too risky, especially this close to Creswell Springs, which was only about a two hours' drive from where we currently where. I knew the homesickness would flood in and I'd want to go home. I kept trying to remind myself it wasn't home anymore. It wasn't.

So what's the harm in calling her?

Clenching my eyes closed, I leaned back against the light post. "f.u.c.k it," I groaned and let my thumb touch the one b.u.t.ton I'd been fighting with myself not to hit all night.

The phone rang three times on the other end before someone answered. "h.e.l.lo?" a somewhat familiar female voice answered, but it wasn't the one I wanted to hear.

"Is Raven home?" I murmured, wondering why Gracie was still at the Hannigans'. Shouldn't she have found her own place by now?

"She's putting the baby to bed. Can I take a message? I'll get her to call you back as soon as she can," she promised.

Baby? What baby?

"Um...no. I-I'll just call her back." Before the other woman could say another word I disconnected and let the hand holding the phone drop to my side.

Had Raven had a baby? Was my best friend a mother now?

"It's not safe out here, Flick."

I jerked at the sound of that name, spoken in that voice, and dropped my phone. I heard the cheap thing break, but didn't care. My head snapped up in the direction his voice had come from and I saw his outline in the darkness just ten feet away. My heart was in my throat, both from the moment of fright and the excitement of hearing the one voice I'd thought I'd never hear again. As I watched, Jet stepped forward and I had to gulp in air all of a sudden.

Holy h.e.l.l. Was it me, or had he gotten bigger? Jet had never been a small man. His shoulders had been wide and muscular for as long as I could remember, but now those shoulders seemed twice as wide. His muscles seemed to pile up on top of one another, causing his shirt to look distressed, as if it would rip if he breathed the wrong way.

He wasn't wearing his cut and the jeans he wore hung deliciously low on his hips. The boots on his feet were the same ones I remembered all too well, though. His favorite. My eyes shot back up to his face, noticing the slight paleness to his usually sun-golden skin.

"There's a lunatic on the run and you're out here by yourself?" he snapped at me. "Are you trying to get hurt, woman?"

It took me a moment to find my voice. "H-how did you know about that?" I was dreaming. That was the only explanation I could come up with. I'd been so desperate to hear a familiar voice that I was dreaming. There was no way Jet could be standing there looking so worried about me, not for real.

Right?

"Everyone on the planet knows about it, Flick. It's all over the news." He took another step closer and I saw the fire in his olive-green eyes. This close, I could smell the mixture of scents that I would always a.s.sociate with Jet Hannigan. It was full of citrus and spice and for some reason the combination had always gone straight to my head quicker than a shot of good Irish whiskey. "You shouldn't be out here alone."

"I'm not alone," I reminded him in a voice that didn't hold the strength I knew I needed when dealing with this man. Dream or not-h.e.l.l, I still wasn't sure-I needed to be strong where Jet was concerned. "I'm with you."

He shook his head, making his blond hair fall across his forehead. "What if I'd been the f.u.c.ker who is terrorizing your boss? Huh? Whoever it is isn't below shooting someone, Flick. Do you want to be her next victim?"

For the first time in days I hadn't been thinking about the woman who had turned my new family's life upside down. I wasn't scared to face down that b.i.t.c.h. I almost relished the thought of running into her. I'd show her what it felt like to be scared of someone. A chick didn't grow up with Raven Hannigan and not know how to fight back. I would have shown that crazy c.u.n.t all the things I'd picked up growing up in the MC would.

Ignoring Jet's questions, I asked a few of my own. "How's Raven? Hawk?"

His eyes narrowed to little slits at the mention of his brother's name. "Hawk has an ol' lady now. Gracie Morgan. Raven's married and has a son. She called him Max."

Happiness for my best friend filled my chest. Raven was married and had a baby boy. I could picture Raven with her son, and the ache to see her grew until my heart actually ached with the need. "I'm happy for her."

"Well, she's not happy with you right now. She's been in tears almost all day because she saw the news. I'm under strict orders not to come home without you." He crossed his arms over his wide chest, making the shirt strain that much more over the new muscles.

I laughed, figuring that I really was dreaming. There was no way in h.e.l.l I was going home with him. Just as there was no way in h.e.l.l that Jet would actually want to take me there.

Jet How was it possible that she was even more beautiful than I remembered?

She wasn't as thin as she'd been when she'd come to San Quentin to tell me she was leaving, but she wasn't as luscious as she had been when we'd been together. It was the perfect in-between, with all her curves rounded in an hourgla.s.s figure that made my body ache with a need that no one but this female could ease. Her hair was shorter now and dyed a vibrant cherry red that put a natural blush into her cheeks. It was because of that hair that it had taken me a moment to recognize her when I'd seen her on the news weeks ago-but only a moment. I could spot my Flick a mile away.

Thanks to the news coverage of what had been going on with her boss, I hadn't had to go looking for her. As soon as my parole officer had left the house earlier that evening, I'd gotten on my bike and rode straight to her. The d.a.m.ned idiot man had taken his sweet-a.s.s time and I'd been out of patience by the time he'd left, but now that I had my eyes on the only person I'd been aching to see for far too f.u.c.king long, all that irritation quickly faded.

But it was only to be replaced with a new frustration. Didn't she care about her own safety? She was out on a dark, deserted street several blocks away from the tour bus I knew she'd been staying on. There was no sight of any of the many guards I'd been watching for the last hour or more, trying to figure out how the h.e.l.l I was going to get inside that f.u.c.king bus and get Flick without causing a s.h.i.t-storm I didn't particularly want to stir up.

Then Flick had just walked off that bus and started walking. I'd followed her at a slower pace, but I probably could have been running after her and she wouldn't have heard me. She'd seemed to be lost in her own mind, as she'd gazed down at the burner phone in her hands. I'd held back when she'd suddenly stopped and made a call. I hadn't heard what she'd said, but the look on her face had made me pick up my pace.

Flick had been in pain and my only thought was to wipe that heartbreaking look off her beautiful face.

"Are you even allowed to leave Trinity County, Jet? I figured you would still be answerable to your parole officer. You're going to get tossed back in prison if you aren't careful." She sounded both disbelieving and concerned.

"My parole was up today, Flick. I've got all the paperwork I need. I've been waiting impatiently for this day to f.u.c.king get here. Otherwise I would have come after your s.e.xy a.s.s weeks ago."

A disbelieving snort escaped her. "Yeah, okay." Flick shook her head, a sad smile on her luscious lips. "Well, thanks for the visit. I'm going back to the bus now... I'm probably asleep on the couch. I'll probably wake up with a d.a.m.n crick in my neck," she muttered to herself.

I caught her wrist as she started to walk past me. Her entire body seemed to jerk as if she'd been electrocuted. Her head shot up and confusion darkened her eyes for a second before the confusion turned to a glare. "You're really here."

"Of course I'm f.u.c.king here. Did you not hear a word I just said, Flick?"

She rolled her beautiful blue eyes at me and I wanted to spank her luscious, s.e.xy a.s.s. "Yeah, I heard you, but I didn't believe it. I thought I was dreaming. What the h.e.l.l, Jet? You can't be here." Her eyes glanced around us a little frantically. "The paparazzi is everywhere, d.a.m.n it. If they see you here..."

I shrugged, unconcerned about any d.a.m.n paparazzi. If anything, the whole pap thing would work in my favor. "What's wrong, Flick? Afraid they will put two and two together and come up with fifteen? Scared they will find out I killed a man for your boss?"

Her face went deathly pale and I realized I'd hit the nail right on the head. An evil grin tried to lift my lips but I stopped it before it could completely form. I'd been wondering how the h.e.l.l I was going to get Flick to come home with me willingly. Now I knew exactly how I could without having to tie her sweet a.s.s to the back of my bike. It was a b.a.s.t.a.r.d thing to do, but I wasn't going to let that keep me from getting Flick home where she belonged.

"Be quiet," she commanded, glancing around once again.

"Why? It's not a secret, is it?" I leaned closer to her, lowering my voice to a stage whisper as I lifted a brow at her. "I killed that f.u.c.ker for Emmie Armstrong, right? She's the reason you had me kill Grady."

As soon as I'd realized just who Flick was working for, I'd done some digging on Emmie Armstrong and her family. I listened to Demon's Wings often, but I hadn't ever really known anything about the band. Emmie had been the band's surrogate sister-and from what the papers said, was really Jesse Thornton's little sister. She'd been orphaned at eleven and gone to live with the band. At eighteen she'd become their road manager and then right before she'd married Nik Armstrong, she had started her own management company.

I also knew that Vince Grady had been her adopted niece's biological father. The sonofab.i.t.c.h had taken the girl, putting Emmie in the hospital with a concussion and the possible miscarriage of her second child. I'd gotten all that information from tabloid stories, so I wasn't sure how true all that s.h.i.t was. It hadn't been long afterward that Grady had showed up in San Quentin with me. I remember the guy being one big bruise with a broken nose-f.u.c.k, a broken face-and several casts. I could only imagine what Thornton had done to the p.r.i.c.k when he'd gotten his hands on him. There had been true rage in the beating of Grady.

Just as Hawk had said, there had been desperation in Flick's voice when she'd called him to ask for her favor. A favor I hadn't thought twice about fulfilling...and using to my advantage now.

Realization flashed in Flick's eyes. "You wouldn't," she breathed.

"Ah, Flick. Have you really forgotten so much about me, baby? I'm a ruthless sonofab.i.t.c.h who will do anything to get my own way. Don't give me what I want and I'll find the first jerk with a camera and tell him all about how Emmie Armstrong got me a message asking me to kill her niece's deadbeat father."

Fire blazed out of those blue eyes I'd fallen in love with so many years ago. "Emmie had nothing to do with that and you know it. I put the hit out. You didn't have to take the job."

"But I did, baby. If it hadn't been me, you would have had any number of...unsavory characters hunting you down and wanting payment for taking out that b.a.s.t.a.r.d. I couldn't let that happen, Flick. I couldn't put you in that kind of danger."

"Such concern." She pursed her lips together. "Too bad I know you're full of s.h.i.t. You don't care what happens to me, Jet. You never did. So don't play that game with me now. Just tell me what you want and I'll get it for you, but you leave Emmie out of this. Or I swear I'll make your life pure h.e.l.l."

"h.e.l.l ain't so bad, Flick. I've been there for so long that I'm used to it." I let go of her hand and crossed my arms over my chest. "The only thing I want is you. You're going to come home with me. Tonight. So go get your stuff and let's go."

Her eyes widened. "No."

"Yes. Now."

"No. I'm not going back with you. I can't, Jet. I don't belong there anymore. I've started over, I'm happy here. Emmie and her family have given me a second chance at a life I didn't think I could continue to live through. This job, this family-they saved me. I'm not just going to walk out on them." I saw the tears before the first one even spilled down her cheek. The pain I heard in her voice and the sight of that one f.u.c.king tear gutted me like nothing else could. "I can't, Jet. I just can't."

"Why?" I demanded, hurting for her-with her. "Why can't you come home? Just tell me that, Flick. I need to know why you can't, because I don't understand."

Two more tears fell, making her lashes wet and her eyes shine brighter in the glow of the streetlight. "Because there are too many bad memories. Everywhere I turn I'll be reminded of what happened. Of why it happened." She wiped angrily at the tears as they fell faster. "Besides, no one needs me there. Not you, or Raven. Not even my own mother. But I'm needed here, Jet. Emmie and Mia and Jagger? They need me."

If I could bring Westcliffe back from the dead I would, just so I could kill him all over again. The night he'd attacked Flick he'd taken more from me than just my kid that had been growing safely in Flick's belly. He had robbed me of Flick too, knowing that she was my only weakness. Knowing that she was the one thing I would have gladly destroyed the world to protect.

"You're wrong, Flick," I got out in a choked voice. "You're so wrong, sweetheart. Raven needs you. She's been a mess ever since you left. She needs you. I. Need. You." Another disbelieving lift of her brows had me rushing on. "Maybe you don't believe that right now, but I'm going to prove it to you, baby. So come home with me and give me the chance to do that. Please."

I'd never begged anyone in my life until right then. But this was f.u.c.king important. I was trying to get my world back. If Flick wanted me on my knees I'd do it, if she would just give me the chance to show her what I'd been too much of a p.u.s.s.y to do in the past.

That I loved her.

"I can't," she said again. Her gaze lingered on me as we both stood there in a tense silence-me trying to figure out how to get her back, and her seeming to find the will to walk away. "Bye, Jet."

She turned to leave.

f.u.c.k this s.h.i.t.

"I wasn't kidding, Felicity," I bit out and she froze. I didn't want to use threats, but she wasn't leaving me much choice. I would be the ruthless b.a.s.t.a.r.d she knew me to be if that was what it took to get what I wanted. "If you take one more step I'll be shouting what I did to the world. I don't give a f.u.c.k if it causes me to have to go back to prison. It's a risk I'm willing to take. But are you? Will your boss? How quick do you think those Feds investigating that kid's attempted kidnapping will jump at the chance to arrest a celebrity like Emmie Armstrong on the charges of murder-for-hire?"

I watched as her shoulders slumped and then she bowed her head. She stood like that for nearly a full minute before lifting her head and turning to face me. There was pure hatred in her eyes now. "You win, Jet. I'll go with you."

Chapter Four.

Felicity If I thought Jet Hannigan couldn't ever break my heart any more than he already had, I'd been wrong. Maybe more wrong than I'd ever been. My heart was shattered and I was sure that for the first time in my life I completely, irrevocably hated him.

It wasn't like I didn't know how ruthless Jet was. He'd do anything to get things to fall into place like he wanted them to. I'd seen it my whole life. He'd been president of the Angel's Halo MC too long, since getting his way was a given in that kind of powerful position. Maybe I didn't know the how, or the what, or even the who, but I did know that Jet had connections that he'd used without so much as a flicker of conscious to make sure that what he needed done was accomplished. He was an outlaw, for f.u.c.k's sake.

At first I'd thought he wouldn't use what I'd asked of him against me, that he might still care about me-a little. Maybe not as the woman who had warmed his bed for so many months, maybe not even as the woman who had nearly given him a son. But at least as a friend, as someone he still respected-a little.

I should have known better, though.

Now as I quietly moved around the bus, deciding on what I could take with me, I was mentally cursing myself for thinking otherwise. I was blinded by a haze of red anger and heart-broken tears. I didn't want to leave Emmie and the little family I'd found for myself, the woman who had become just as much a sister to me as I'd always thought of Raven being. But I knew I couldn't chance Jet running his mouth to anyone who would listen to him and Emmie getting into trouble for something I'd done.

A tiny sigh had me glancing down into the crib where Jagger was sleeping peacefully. A small smile lifted at the corners of the adorable little baby's lips, as if he were having good dreams, and my heart broke a little more. This little boy had been my true saving grace. Getting to care for him had healed the gaping wound that had still lingered after Westcliffe's beating. Getting to hold him, feed him, read to him, and even bathe him every night had finally given me the peace to let go of the pain of not getting to hold my own little guy.

I wiped away my tears before stroking a finger down Jagger's baby-soft cheek. He let out another little sigh and his grin grew bigger. "Bye, sweet guy."

A sob threatened to escape me and I quickly swallowed it before moving back into the living room. I wiped away the last of my tears, not wanting to go back outside, where I'd left Jet, with the evidence of my pain on my face. It wasn't like he would care anyway, but I didn't want to show him how much he could still break me.

I left a note for Emmie on the kitchenette table and grabbed the small bag I'd packed. It only held a few changes of clothes and the things my heart ached to leave behind. I couldn't take everything with me, not on the back of Jet's bike. Maybe Emmie would send me the rest. Or I could come back.

Yeah, maybe I could come back. When Jet got bored with having me around, when I became nothing more than a pa.s.sing thought to him again. It was sure to happen. It always did.

Stepping down off the bus, I gave a nod to the two men still standing by the door. Their eyes had been on the huge biker standing several feet away. As I started toward Jet, one of the guards caught my wrist. Surprised, I looked up at the man. He was one of Seller's men who had been added right after the first attack on Shane and Harper's bus. I had talked to the guy several times and had even liked him. He hadn't told me his name, but then again none of them really did that.

"Is this what you want to do, Miss Bolton?"

I felt the tension radiating off of Jet before I felt his heat. He stepped behind me, whether to intimidate me or the guard, I wasn't sure. I couldn't risk a fight breaking out. It would wake Emmie and Nik and who knew who else from the buses parked nearby. "Yes, I'm sure. Take care of them for me." I gave him a smile and carefully pulled my wrist free before turning to Jet.

His face was full of that scary menace that he used when one of his MC brothers had p.i.s.sed him off. That look was deadly. I put a hand to Jet's chest and his face softened slightly. His pale, olive-jade eyes lowered to my face and he took the bag that I'd packed. "Ready?"

"Yeah," I murmured and he gently clasped my hand in his as he led me away from the buses.