A Married Man - Part 12
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Part 12

'But - what on earth were you doing,' Rose turned to Rozanna, 'at the House of Lords?'

'Oh, I was with my father. Lord Belfont.' She regarded Rose steadily and didn't flinch for a moment.

Rose did, though. 'Oh! Really?' She eyed her suspiciously. Archie continued to nod furiously, staring hard at the ground. 'Hmm, yes, Belfont. That was it,' he muttered.

'Well, how lovely to meet you, my dear,' Rose collected herself at length. 'Always a delight to meet Lucy's friends. Do excuse us if you would though, my husband and I simply must go and talk to the rest of our guests. So many people to get around. Archie, come.' She called him sharplyto heel and he followed sheepishly.

'Oh please don't tell me,' I groaned as they disappeared, shutting my eyes. 'Please don't tell me, Rozanna . .

'That he was one of my clients? Prospective, actually, but I turned him down. Much too old, and anyway, he couldn't afford me. Tight as a drum, old Archie Fellowes, but through him I met a much younger, nicer chap who was a regular for years. His loss, not mine. I must say, I had no idea he was your pa-in-law, Luce. Just think, you could have b.u.mped into him on the stairs of Royal Avenue! Imagine how entertaining that could have been.'

'Hugely,' I muttered grimly. 'And you realise Rose has beetled straight off to the library to look you up in Debrett's?' 'Which is precisely where she'll find me,' she said sweetly. 'Oh!' I blinked. 'Really?'

'Really.' She glanced around. Sighed. 'Rather a lot of people I know here, actually. Might have to make myself scarce. Can't have too many men biting through their champagne gla.s.ses and trying to avoid my eye, can we? I must say, it's a novelty to see them with their wives. Amazing really,' she mused. 'I could clear this place in seconds.'

'Well, please don't,' I said nervously. 'I shall have to live with the consequences. Oh look, here's one you hopefully won't know since he doesn't have a wife to cheat on. Hector, this is Rozanna Carling'

Hector sidled up blushing and shook hands, his enlarged Adam's apple bobbing up and down in his throat. Rozanna, spotting a gauche ingenu, smiled gently and engaged him in what pa.s.sed, for Hector, for animated conversation, whilst I took the opportunity to wander off. I was vaguely looking for Teresa and Jess, hoping they were OK, but I needn't have worried. As I glanced around I spotted them leaning against the terrace wall, giggling like schoolgirls, and being thoroughly chatted up by a couple of older, hearty-looking hunting types, who clearly couldn't believe their luck to come across such a pretty young London duo at one of Rose's bashes. Jess and Teresa, minus their husbands thank you very much, appeared to be having a whale of time, and were flirting their little socks off. I watched as Jess, head back and roaring with laughter, gaily plucked a gla.s.s of champagne from a pa.s.sing tray, apparently having conquered any qualms she might previously have had about consorting with the ruling cla.s.ses.

I jumped as Lavinia suddenly seized my arm from behind. 'I think you should meet Simon,' she hissed urgently, teetering to a standstill beside me and trying to focus her pink, road-map eyes on mine. 'In fact, I think it's imperative.'

'Simon?'

'Yes, lovely man. G.o.d, Mummy's invited some real duffers this evening, I can't tell you how shocked I am at the standard, Lucy, and I'm so sorry, but Simon's sweet. You'll like him. Bit of a rectory.'

'Sorry?' I glanced across as she jerked her head in the direction of a pallid, narrow-headed man in a shiny dinner jacket.

'That's what he's got. Wouldn't do for me of course, you'd be pushed to even call it imposing.' She sniffed, and waved her gla.s.s in the direction of the pallid man's back. 'Handsome though.'

I peered. 'D'you think?'

'No no, the rectory.'

'Ah, right' I recovered. 'Oh, I see. Oh, well then no, Lavinia, in that case he wouldn't do for me at all. You see, unless it's Grade I Georgian and moated, with four thousand acres and a safari park in the back garden, I'm afraid I'm simply not interested' I bestowed a sweet smile and moved on.

'Good for you,' I heard her mutter behind me. Then, rather belligerently to a pa.s.sing lackey, 'To the top, please, young man. Yes, I'm perfectly sure. Just pour it, d.a.m.n you!'

Hector reappeared at my elbow. Alone again, naturally, and looking awkward, as I suspected he always did at these shindigs.

'You look lovely,' he said wistfully.

I smiled, surprised. 'Thank you, Hector.'

'Everyone says so. And everyone keeps asking me who you are. When I say Ned's wife, no one can quite believe it. I suppose they remember you years ago. You know, when you were quite fat. With darker hair.'

I giggled. No one could accuse Hector of being a smooth talking charmer, and with such a seductive line in small talk, was it really any wonder he hadn't found a wife yet?

'You'll be telling me next I don't sweat much, for a fat girl' 'Don't you?'

I sighed. 'Oh Hector . .

'And she was a sweet girl too,' he went on, jerking his head back in the direction of Rozanna, surrounded now by admirers.

'Rozanna?'

'Mmmm' He sighed. Looked thoughtful for a moment. 'You know,' he said suddenly, 'it occurred to me the other day, Lucy, that maybe I should just marry you. March you up the aisle and be done with it.'

I jumped, horrified. 'Me!'

'Yes, what d'you think?'

'Well, Hector, I really don't-'

'You know, do the right thing by Ned and all that. Look after you. For him.'

I smiled. Squeezed his arm. 'That's really sweet of you, Hec, but I'd say it's above and beyond the call of duty, wouldn't you? That sort of chivalry went out with the Indians.'

'Oh, I don't know, it wouldn't be too bad. Just think, you wouldn't have to get to know a new set of in-laws, and from my point of view, you're a known quant.i.ty and all that. Pretty, too. And being married of course, you've done it all before. Wouldn't come as too much of a shock. Probably know more than I do, actually.'

Suddenly I had a violent desire to be elsewhere. The lavatory, perhaps. Perfect, that would do. I informed Hector of this and scurried away, glancing back nervously over my shoulder as I walked up to the house.

Deciding I might as well take refuge in the loo for a bit anyway, I walked through to the back hall and tried the one by the butler's pantry, knowing it wouldn't be familiar to the rest of the guests. As I rattled the handle, a shriek went up.

'Hang on! Just a moment!'

Two seconds later Pinkie emerged, living up to her name, with a hectic glow about her cheeks. Her hair was tousled, and she was frantically smoothing down a very tight little black dress. She was followed, a moment later, by an equally flushed young man, doing up his flies.'Oops! Sorry, Lucy.' Pinkie giggled.

'Ah,' I purred, with what I hoped was cool elan. 'This must be Ludo.'

'Ludo?' He glanced up from his flies, looking blank. 'No no, Peregrine Vesty, actually. Delighted.' He smiled toothily and extended his hand.

I took it briefly then disappeared into the sanctuary of the loo, locking the door firmly behind me. G.o.d, this family, I thought, flicking up my skirt and sitting down with a vengeance. No wonder Ned had avoided them like the plague.

I emerged a few minutes later, looking about cautiously and keeping a wary eye out for Fellowes. Happily, though, the aunts had arrived and were causing a welcome diversion. Having roared throatily up the drive momentarily scaring the party in the rose garden into silence as they no doubt imagined the local boy racers were about to career straight through them, scattering them like skittles the red Fiesta had then spun around the fountain, and paused, leaving everyone in an agony of antic.i.p.ation. I arrived just in time to see it not scorch backwards into the hedge, but spring forwards, up onto the lawn, narrowly missing a waiter who had to leap out of the way, tray flying, and skid to a halt. The aunts emerged looking unperturbed. They were resplendent in matching floral frocks of an eye-searing pink and yellow combination, emblazoned with a bird of paradise design. It came to me that of course, these were the curtains. Hence the newspaper at the windows. On their feet were huge court shoes the size of boats, again identical, and presumably bought as a job lot in a outsize sale.

As we watched them march determinedly into the middle of the party, I heard Rose whisper to Archie, behind me, 'We'll have to get them back to the doctor again, Archie. Get him to order them to give up driving. They'll kill someone one day. Betty Partridge says they roar through the village like that every day!'

'Awfully difficult to live in Netherby if you haven't got a car,' observed Archie mildly.

'Much harder in live in Netherby if you've killed half the residents!' she snapped back, before stalking off.

'Actually, it wouldn't make much difference,' said a dry voice in my ear. 'Most of the residents round here are half dead anyway.'

I spun around. 'Jack!' I said delightedly, as I was swept off my feet in a huge bear hug. 'Oh Jack, how lovely! What are you doing here?'

Jack was Ned's cousin, a lovely, irreverent, dissolute man; tall, and with the Fellowes blue eyes, but with dark chestnut curls and a disreputably handsome face.

'What d'you mean, what am I doing here? I'm family, aren't I?'

'Yes, but I thought you couldn't bear these bashes!'

'Oh, I wouldn't miss this one for the world. I'm here in a professional capacity, you see, in anthropological mode. Come to watch another world go by. A dim and distant one.' He grinned. 'And anyway, I'd heard you were here, so I thought I'd come and pester you for a bit.'

'You're staying?'

'Oh yes, most definitely. Most definitely on the scrounge for some hospitality, but unlike you, not for ever. That would be unscrupulous. No, I'm just here for a month or so while myhouse is being renovated.' He regarded me mischievously over his gla.s.s.

'Jack, I am not on the scrounge,' I said furiously. 'I don't know what you've been told, but I was kindly offered the barn by Rose, and for the boys' sake, simply for the boys' sake-'

'You thought you'd be mad to look a gift horse in the mouth. And quite right too.' He grinned. 'Don't worry, Luce, I'm just seeing if you still rise as spectacularly as you always did. Just reeling you in'

'Ah, the Compleat Angler,' I observed drily.

'Absolutely, and keen to do a bit of the real thing too, while I'm here. The river looks perfect. Still,' he mused, glancing around, 'be interesting to see if you can stay the course. They haven't driven you to drink then yet, like someone we know?' He raised his eyebrows as Lavinia staggered past, breathing heavily, muttering to herself and clutching a champagne bottle to her breast.

I groaned. 'No, but I have a feeling it's only a matter of time. I'd forgotten - well' I stopped, guiltily.

'How ghastly they all are? Ah no, not me,' he said shaking his head, lips pursed. 'I only have to walk through that front door and it all comes flooding back in glorious technicolour. Still, needs must, and I have to say, I am a bit needy at the moment' He drained his gla.s.s cheerfully.

I smiled. Jack was a university lecturer of sorts, inasmuch as his wild social life would let him hold down a job at all. He hung onto his post at London University by the skin of his teeth, and when he wasn't being hauled up before the Dean for reprehensible behaviour, taught English and Theatre Studies. He was a bit of a poet, too, on the sly, but as he always rather ruefully observed, poetry wasn't quite merchant banking, and he always seemed to be lurching from one financial crisis to the next.

'Not in gainful employment at the moment then, Jack?' I enquired sweetly.

He straightened up. 'I'll have you know I'm about to have a small volume published, for which I've been slipped a not inconsiderable advance. Added to which I've also been made head of my department, but it may have escaped your notice, Lucy, that the holiday season is upon us, and as such, my services are not required. I told you, I've come to annoy you.'

'That'll be fun,' I said, and meant it.

Undeniably wicked, and with an appalling reputation for unsuitable dalliances with beautiful women, Jack, nonetheless, was terrific company. He radiated vitality, and was the only member of the family Ned had ever had any time for. The first time I'd met Ned, years ago, at a dance here in Oxford, he'd been with Jack. The pair of them had been propping up the college bar and getting exceedingly drunk - quietly in Ned's case and noisily in Jack's - and Ned had bought me a drink. We'd then danced the night away in something of a euphoric trance - eyes locked in recognition of something really rather wonderful - and didn't see Jack for the rest of the evening. The next morning, however, there was a terrible rumpus when he was discovered in bed with the warden's daughter, and had to make a speedy exit, naked, but for an ap.r.o.n, from a second-floor window. I smiled into my gla.s.s, remembering the sc.r.a.pes Ned and I had hauled him out of.

'And you, Luce. Are you better?' he enquired gently, breaking into my thoughts.

I startled. 'Oh! Oh yes, much better thanks.' I blushed. Poor Jack had been party to some miserable evenings with me after Ned had died. I'd sobbed all over him, and not just at the time, either. Up until relatively recently he'd been subjected to some very maudlin company in Royal Avenue, when I still hadn't quite recovered.

'It took me a long time,' I said ruefully. 'As I'm sure you're aware. But you know, Jack,' I glanced up, 'I think I can safely say that four years down the line I'm as well as I'll ever be.' I smiled. 'And you? Still the seasoned Lothario? Still hustling your wares around the university, simultaneously breaking undergraduates' hearts and colleagues' marriages?' I glanced around. 'Unusual to see you unaccompanied, I must say. What happened to that pneumatic Brazilian beauty I met you with last time? She was gorgeous'

'Two Planks?' His eyes widened.

I giggled. 'Oh come on, she wasn't that bad'

'Oh no, not that bad. In fact, very good, in many respects -mostly horizontal - and very easy on the eye too, but pretty devoid of grey matter nonetheless. No, I decided her best friend, Ursula the Nord was more of a challenge. A mistake, as it happened, since Ursula was a big girl, much bigger than me, and I still have the bruises to show for it.' He gave a mock shudder. 'But actually,' he mused, 'I'm grateful to old Ursula in many respects. She was the catalyst, you see Lucy, the turning point in my career. After Ursula I felt drained, exhausted, a mere hulk of a guy, but I rose up, and these days - well, I'm a changed man.'

'Oh really? How so?'

'It's quite simple. I've decided to abandon the predatory s.e.xual role I've been forced into all these years. I've grown weary of it, you see.' His blue eyes widened innocently.

I chuckled. 'I don't believe that for one moment! And who says you were forced into it, anyway?'

'Ah but it's true.' He sighed. 'All of us unattached males who don't suffer too much from dandruff or gushing armpits do feel a dreary sense of obligation to chase the fairer s.e.x, you know. And sometimes well, frankly I'm just not in the mood. Haven't got the energy. I sometimes long for the days when the back of a neck, underneath a wimple perhaps, bent to study some charming needlepoint, could keep a chap going for months, before galloping off with your mates to have a b.l.o.o.d.y good battle in Scotland. Must have been marvellous. So much more restful, and actually,' he mused, 'more s.e.xy. All that pent-up desire and never actually doing it . .

'Except with your wh.o.r.e, of course.'

'Oh, of course. Chap's got to let off steam.' He drained his gla.s.s and sighed. 'No, I've had it with women I'm afraid, and I intend to withdraw from the whole tedious charade. I plan to build myself a nice little Platonic world where I'll have more time to appreciate literature and the arts, because frankly Luce, I'm just a s.h.a.gged-out old wreck at the moment.' He gazed mournfully into his gla.s.s.

I laughed. 'You'll perk up.'

'Oh absolutely not. No, I'm past perking. G.o.d, you've no idea. It's all so utterly predictable. All that obligatory chasing to sustain your reputation, and then when you do get a night off, that terrible moment when some Lycra-ed b.u.m slides onto the bar stool beside you and bang goes a quiet evening with a pint and a book as you realise you're committed to yet anotherevening's full-blown flirtation. Christ, the effort, the brain-power expended, the attempts to be winning and charming and then back to her place to execute some supposedly cla.s.sy manoeuvres and prove your magnificence in bed, and then waking up the next morning, surrounded by cuddly toys, with a sore head and no clean underpants.' He shuddered. 'I'm too old for all that' He shook his head ruefully and sank into his champagne gla.s.s again. 'In fact, I sometimes think ... h.e.l.lo?' he said suddenly, without quite rising from his gla.s.s. 'What have we here? Rather pretty.'

I followed his gaze to where Trisha, who was supposed to be employed handing round canapes, was roaring with laughter in the middle of a clutch of male guests, dressed in a low-cut top and a sarong skirt.

I laughed. 'You see? You see! Always on the prowl!'

'Not at all,' he said quickly, 'I'm merely continuing the anthropological study I mentioned earlier. Merely making observations, because study, is, after all, a major part of my new Platonic venture. And speaking of study, young Lucy, what do you intend to do with yourself down here? Thinking of going back to work at all, or are you just going to continue bringing up those two young scamps I ran into earlier? They seemed to have found a friend, incidentally, a certain Pietro, and the three of them set about tackling me and pinning me to the ground in a horribly expert manner. I let them think I was subjugated, then roared like fury and rose up like a Phoenix from the ashes, arms flailing as- Lucy?'

But I wasn't listening. I was still watching Trisha, whose conversation was clearly about me. She was nodding and smiling in my direction in an animated fashion, and now she was pulling the arm of her friend, a man who had his back to us. I caught my breath, tightening my grip on the stem of my champagne gla.s.s. The man turned his head, and looked in our direction. My heart leaped up into my throat and rattled around like some crazed pinball. They were coming towards us now, the pair of them, and the man Trisha had by the sleeve of his jacket - was Charlie.

Chapter Ten.

The pair of them came across the lawn towards us; Trisha, clearly over-excited, gesticulating wildly, and talking nonstop, and Charlie, looking even more devastatingly handsome than I remembered. He was wearing an elegant, biscuit-coloured linen jacket, and his head was slightly c.o.c.ked to one side as he listened to what Trisha was saying. Despite the-incline of his head, though, his dark eyes were bright and focused. Princ.i.p.ally on me. I felt the blood drain right through me, down my legs, and away into my witty little Italian shoes.

'Lucy,' Trisha called. She flagged me down with a long brown arm as she approached. 'Hey, Lucy, listen!' She halted breathlessly in front of me. 'This guy's called Charlie Fletcher, right, and - oh boy,' she rolled her eyes dramatically, 'are you gonna be thrilled to bits. Are you gonna just be so pleased I got you guys together!'

I couldn't speak. Had neither wind nor words to draw on. I couldn't look at him, either. Kept my eyes firmly on her.

'You won't believe this,' she swept on, 'but I was like, prattling away to Charlie just now about all your antiques and stuff in the barn, telling him how it had been your thing in London and how you'd like to get back into it and I'll look after the kids and everything, and suddenly Charlie was like "Oh, OK. Well hang on, Trish, I've got this friend, right, who's got an antiques place near here, and he's looking for some help. D'you think that would be her kind of thing?" So I was like, "Oh, what? Her kind of thing? That would be totally her kind of thing!" Well, wouldn't it, Luce?' She beamed. 'Lucy? Charlie?'

She glanced back at Charlie, but he was staring intently at me. He didn't appear to be listening to her at all.

'But how extraordinary,' he said finally. 'It's you. We know each other, don't we? Please tell me I'm not going mad.'

I could feel my cheeks burning up now. 'N-no,' I stammered. 'You're not. I mean, you're right, we do. Know each other. From London.'

'From London,' he said, nodding slowly. 'That's it. That's it exactly. How peculiar.' He blinked. 'D'you know,' he said suddenly, taking his eyes off me and turning to Trisha, 'it was the weirdest thing. Up until a few weeks ago, I used to see this girl constantly. Practically every single day. It was quite extraordinary. And now well b.u.g.g.e.r me,' he turned back, ran a bemused hand through his hair. 'Here you are again. Down here!'

Trisha frowned, confused. 'Hang on, how d'you mean?'

'It was just bizarre.' Charlie shook his head incredulously. 'Literally everywhere I went in London, every shop I went into, every bus I got onto there she was!' He paused, gestured towards me. 'Lucy, is it?'

'Yes, Lucy,' I gasped, horrified, and positively dripping with perspiration now. Oh come on, I thought, aghast. Not everyday, surely, and not every bus, and every shop that was a little far-fetched! I was aware of the deep blush spreading down my neck to my chest now, and of Jack's eyes upon me.

'But wouldn't you agree though?' persisted Charlie relentlessly. 'We were always b.u.mping into each other. Crowded street, busy supermarket, you name it, there we were behind each other in the queue and d'you know what's really uncanny?'

I shook my head. Just about managed an uncanny little whinny. Wondered if I could slink away and die without anyone noticing.