I ignore the innuendo. Lady Twombley, I am aware that for a successful _entree_ into Society I requiah a--ha--a substantial guarantee. I 'ave, therefore, the honour and the 'appiness to put myself under your sheltering and I 'ope sympathetic wing.

LADY TWOMBLEY.

You--you will drive me mad! You won't dare to call here, to contaminate my bell-handle, to send up your hideous name!

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

Oh, Fan, I really can't! This is descendin' to a mere wrangle. Pray cut in.

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

No, Lady Twombley, as the Season is drawing to a close, Joseph certainly does not intend to attach himself to your London establishment.

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

Not for Joseph--excuse my humour.

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

But he and I do mean to take our flight from town with the rest of the swallows. [Pointing to a paragraph in the journal she still carries.]

Look here, we saw this paragraph in the paper yesterday. Read it.

[LADY TWOMBLEY knocks the paper to the ground.]

LADY TWOMBLEY.

Insolent!

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

Jo, pet--read it.

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

f.a.n.n.y, this is really most trying. [Picking up the paper and reading.]

"There are already signs of an exodus from town. Among the first of the notabilities to turn their faces northward are Sir Julian and Lady Twombley, who will spend the autumn at Drumdurris Castle as the guests of their nephew, Lord Drumdurris."

LADY TWOMBLEY.

What is this to you?

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

What's that to us!

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

Fan, what's that to us! Lady Twombley, we entertain a not unreasonable desiah to spend _our_ autumn at Drumdurris Castle.

LADY TWOMBLEY.

In the kitchen?

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

Oh, Fan, I really can't! You must cut in again.

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

As the guests of Lord Drumdurris.

LADY TWOMBLEY.

Never!

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

Bill Number One falls due next month when you are at Drumdurris Castle!

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

No, no! Fan, do _not_ mix up business with friendship. You know my rule.

MRS. GAYl.u.s.tRE.

Get us to Drumdurris and we renew!

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.

Oh, f.a.n.n.y, how plainly you put it! Don't!

LADY TWOMBLEY.

Never!

[MR. MELTON enters.]

MR. MELTON.

The carriages are here, Lady Twombley.

LADY TWOMBLEY.

I--I'll come.

[DRUMDURRIS enters talking to VALENTINE. IMOGEN, LADY EUPHEMIA, and BROOKE follow; then EGIDIA and ANGeLE with the infant.]

MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.