Chapter 6.

Not meant to be.

At ten thirty, I walked into Cafe Du Monde. Satisfied that there was no blue peacoat in sight, I took a table on the patio next to one of the heaters. I needed a few minutes to calm my nerves, but of course, the cafe au lait did nothing to ease the jitters. I was celebrating the loss of four pounds, and with that, I found the resolve to resist the lure of beignets.

At five till, Charity arrived. I saw her first. Her dark hair was cut short in an inverted bob, heavily highlighted. She was thin, and that made me a tad self-conscious, even though I was wearing a pair of jeans I couldn't get into a month ago. She had a beautiful smile that lit up her face when she noticed my wave.

"h.e.l.lo," she said as she extended her hand. "My real name is Stacy."

I stood and took her hand. "It's nice to meet you, I'm Shannon."

"You're definitely not pitiful y ugly," she said as she took a seat.

"Thank you," I said, flattered by the compliment.

"I'm so glad you managed to find a spot near one of the heaters. The wind is really chilly out there."

"I have on flannel-lined jeans." Oh, my G.o.d, what a dumb thing to say. My mind scrambled for something intelligent to add.

"I know that's ridiculous to admit living in the South, but I can't stand the cold."

"That's brilliant. I'll have to invest in a pair."

42.

*I wanted to get her talking so I wouldn't have to. "So what's it like working at Charity?"

"It's often sad but extremely rewarding, too. I love working with babies. They don't argue, and they're always happy when you show up with a bottle."

"I imagine it gets pretty stressful."

Stacy nodded and ordered a coffee when our waiter appeared.

"It can be, yes. That's why I love gardening. Everything slips away when I'm working with my plants and flowers. Accounting can be stressful, too, I'm sure."

"It is sometimes, but for the most part, what I do is simple.

Payroll is done by another company, so I mostly manage the money, pay a few bills, and fill out loads of tax forms. The rest of the time is mine."

"So aside from reading and movies, what do you do with the rest of your spare time?"

Nothing was the truth, but I wasn't going to admit that. "I sometimes fish with my brother-in-law. The rest of the time, I'm shopping with my sister. She has a pa.s.sion for antiques, so we're often muddling through shops." I sounded like I was ninety. I should've added cross-st.i.tching and shuffleboard.

"Do you like horses?"

"I don't know any personally, but I think they're generally okay."

"I love to ride," she said, ignoring my stupid joke. "When I'm not in my garden, I spend a lot of time with a friend who has a few."The conversation seemed to flow well after that. We talked about growing up in New Orleans and shared silly stories about our childhoods. I found myself relaxing and enjoying her company, until...

"So..." Stacy leaned in closer. "Let's talk about things of a more personal nature. I like to get this out in the open because it spares embarra.s.sment later. How many dates do you like to go on before things get intimate?"

What happened to I'm looking to make a friend first, and if that develops into something more, that's fine by me?

4.

*"I...uh..."

"Don't be bashful," she said with a grin. "We need to know if we're compatible, right? We're adults, and adults have s.e.x."

I had no problem with s.e.x, although I didn't care to discuss it when I wasn't doing it. But I did have a problem with her bringing it up at our first meeting. "I guess your question just took me by surprise."

Stacy aka Charity leaned even closer to me and stroked the back of my hand. "I'm a cut-to-the-chase kind of girl."

I watched her fingers and noticed the indention on her left ring finger. Somewhere in her pocket was a gold band that probably matched another worn by a girlfriend who had no idea her lover was meeting me for coffee, or worse, a husband waiting for her to bring home an extra plaything.

"How do you feel..." she lowered her voice, "about a.n.a.l s.e.x?""What?" I practically shouted. "Oh, my G.o.d! You touch babies with those hands?"

"Don't get all prudish, and lower your voice." Stacy looked over at a few stunned onlookers and smiled. When she looked back at me, the smile dropped from her face with what little charm she had up until that moment. "Look, I don't think things are going to work out between us."

"I'll say."

"I'm gonna go now, it's been a treat."

It sure was, I thought as I paid the tab and left.

I was disgusted when I burst through the courtyard gate. As was becoming a habit, Hailey met me in the courtyard.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"I was just thrown for a loop."

"Were you mugged?" she asked with a horrified expression.

"No, metaphorically speaking. I just had an eye-opening conversation with someone."

"You want to have a coffee with me and talk about it?"

"No, no coffee!"

"Okay, calm down." Hailey held her hands up and backed up a step.

44.

*"I'm sorry. I guess it was all for the best. She was more than likely going to be a pain in my a.s.s." I ran my fingers through my hair and let out a long breath. "I'm sorry."

"A prospective client, I presume?" Hailey asked.

I should've come out and said a prospective date, but I wasn't ready to reveal the fact that I was gay. I'd begun to enjoy Hailey's company, and I didn't want any awkward tension between us.

"How about a walk? I'll treat you to a cup of coffee if you'd like," I said as I began to calm down.

"A walk sounds great, and maybe we can have lunch. That'll be my treat."

"Will Fuzzy be joining us?" I asked when I noticed the dog wasn't with her.

"No." Hailey pushed open the gate and waited for me to walk through. "She's watching a movie."

I noticed that she didn't crack a smile when I walked past her.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah, she likes Grease. She can be chasing a ball or ripping up a stuffed toy, but when that movie comes on, she stretches out in front of the TV and doesn't move until it's over. Don't try to sing along, either. That just p.i.s.ses her off."

"She's good company, isn't she?"

Hailey pulled a pair sungla.s.ses off the top of her head, turning her curls loose. She looked s.e.xy with the dark gla.s.ses and her hair all wild, but I missed seeing her vibrant green eyes. "She's loaded with unconditional love. She never argues or complains unless I interrupt her movie. When I'm sad, she knows it and curls up next to me."

"Maybe that's what I'm missing in my life. A pet, something to take care of." I shoved my hands into the pockets of my hoodie as the cool January wind pushed in behind us.

"There's no significant other in your life then?" Hailey asked.

"No," I said with a shiver. "Sometimes, I doubt there ever will be. I'm not very good at playing the dating game."

"Sometimes it's just easier being alone," Hailey said as she dodged a sewer grate. "No hurt feelings, no obligations."

4.

*We strolled up St. Ann to Bourbon Street. When we got to the intersection, Hailey turned right. If she noticed all the rainbow flags waving above us, she didn't let on. She was new to the neighborhood and probably unaware that she'd just led us into the heart of the gay district. She was telling me about meeting the couple who lived in the apartment behind hers. When we pa.s.sed two drag queens, she didn't bat an eye. She smiled and said h.e.l.lo to them unfazed. I took that as a good sign. Maybe when I revealed I was gay, she wouldn't be put off.

As promised, I bought her a cup of coffee, and we found an open bench dappled in warm sunlight and took a seat. "So where did you move here from?" I asked. Her lips twitched for a second before she answered.

"I was on Tchoupitoulas Street for a while."

"Oh, so you didn't move far. You're probably pretty well acquainted with the neighborhood." She'd taken her sungla.s.ses off in the coffee shop, but she put them back over her eyes before answering.

"Not really," she said after her lips twitched again. "I never really ventured down this way much. You don't really get to know an area until you live there, I guess. How long have you lived here?"

"All my life, but I've only lived in our building for about six years. It's funny, I never experienced Mardi Gras until I was eighteen. My parents would take us to Harahan to stay with my grandparents every season. They'd drive us to school in horrendous traffic, it took forever. I remember sleeping under a blanket in the backseat for most of the ride."

"You never got to see the parades?"

"The smaller ones in Harahan, but not in the city until I was an adult. My parents weren't prudes, but they didn't want to expose us to the crowds. My mother was terrified that we'd get separated."

Hailey took a sip of her mocha latte and purred in delight. "I guess my parents might've been the same way."

"I take it they don't live in the city?"

"No." Hailey shook her head. "Washington, my dad is retired military."

"How'd you end up here then?"

4.

*"Work." She gave my arm a squeeze. "Now that you're calm, do you want to tell me about why you were so upset earlier?"

I looked at her for second, wishing she would take off her gla.s.ses. I wanted to see her eyes when I told her the truth. "I'm a member of an online dating site. I met a girl there that seemed really nice. We agreed to meet at Cafe Du Monde, and everything was going well. I kind of got my hopes up that she'd be someone I would be interested in dating." I waited a second, watching her face, waiting for her eyebrows to rise over the gla.s.ses, but they didn't. "Anyway, I was put off by her directness. I just didn't think where she was steering the conversation was appropriate for having just met in person. And then I noticed that her left ring finger had a definite dent in it."

"Did you talk to her a while online before you met?" she asked coolly.